(05-26-2020, 01:13 PM)Zubrowka Wrote: [ -> ]Hello Shannon. I’m reading a book and came over the term “high value man”. I just would like to see if this definition goes in line with what you had in mind when designing AM.
Sorry for being a pain in the ass with the rule 20 stuff the other day.
Quote:Are You a High-Value Man?
This book is for high-value men. Sometimes that term refers to a man’s income, or to the bounty on his head. Here it refers to the kind of man, rich or poor, whom women seek out for long-term commitment.
I didn’t invent the term. I’m not that clever. It comes from evolutionary psychology, a field of study explaining the behavior that helped humanity thrive. We have an amazing number of mental and behavioral predispositions that evolutionary psychologists refer to as adaptations. They keep us alive.
For example, worrying about the future is an adaptation that compels us to store food for lean times. A sense of humor is an adaptation that helps men attract women. Even pessimism appears to be adaptive. It’s a variety of error-management, a mental calculus that helps us prevent unpleasant surprises. It can be useful so long as it doesn’t get out of hand.
The high-value man, according to evolutionary psychologists, is one who possesses what women look for. In an outstanding review of evolutionary research, David Schmitt (2005) described the most basic, animalistic traits men and women seek in each other.
“Men place a greater premium on signals of fertility and reproductive value such as a woman’s youth and physical appearance,” he wrote. No surprise there.
“In contrast, women place a greater premium on a man’s status, resources, ambition, and maturity—cues relevant to his ability for long- term provisioning—and to his kindness, generosity, and emotional openness—cues to his willingness to provision women and their children.” Again, no surprises.
I know what some of you are thinking: we are all complex individuals with unique motivations. I agree, but beneath our individual complexities are ancient predispositions driving our desires. Men, in general, prefer a nice hip-to-waist ratio. Women, in general, prefer a nice debt-to-asset ratio.
So what constitutes a high-value man in the modern world? It appears little has changed since our ancestors were hunting and gathering. A man’s value to women boils down to those two words Dr. Schmitt italicized: ability and willingness .
High-value men have the ability to be long-term providers. That doesn’t necessarily mean they’re wealthy. It simply means they possess certain qualities like foresight, discipline, a social network, resourcefulness, intelligence, and humor.
High-value men also have the willingness to stick around. Willingness is evident in qualities like generosity, emotional stability, and the ability to maintain emotional bonds. Maybe that’s why so many young couples end up with dogs. Puppies were probably invented so women could test men’s willingness to commit to a noisy, hungry creature with poor bowel control.
Essentially, the high-value man is open to commitment and professionally squared away—or at least he’s headed in that direction. I’d like to add one more trait to the list: masculinity. The high-value man doesn’t relinquish his testicles or apologize for possessing them. He cultivates those male qualities that benefit himself and the people he loves. In our society there is a small, noisy contingent of women (and a few men) who insist that masculinity is destructive and outdated, but I can assure you they are the minority.
When I surveyed women a few years ago for a different project, I asked them what they liked most about men. Most of the women were quite vocal about the qualities they appreciate in a man:
“Humor. Protectiveness. Strength.”
“Their sense of humor, their masculinity and strength.” “Their confidence, strength, and tendency to be easy-going.”
Strength and level-headedness were a major theme. They expressed adoration for masculine traits like independence and competitiveness. In my decade as a psychologist, I’ve heard plenty of complaints about husbands and boyfriends, but I have never heard a woman wish that her man was more like a girl.
Ability, willingness, and a masculine nature. If you possess these traits, then you possess what most women seek in a husband or partner. Congratulations. You’re a high-value man. It’s good to be wanted, isn’t it?
First, there is a flaw in the article you included and that is that it assumes that all "high value men" are only "high value" because they have the traits that make them high value
to women. (We will leave the discussion of the potential change to this if the man and his admirers are gay men, as it complicates the subject enough to be distracting from my central point in this instance, without adding much to the specific discussion you bring up.)
That is only one definition, and a very skewed one.
AM6 is about a man's achievement of his own highest potentials as a self-leading, self-reliant and self-capable man,
for his own highest good.
It doesn't rely on what women want or think as a measure of what its goals are. It is about making the user a true, Transcendental Alpha. The nice thing about that is, when a man does that, everything else naturally and automatically falls into place. When he becomes his own support system, mentally, emotionally, financially, physically, he can (and typically will) do and achieve anything he chooses to. As a Transcendent Alpha, he is not beholden to the group hierarchy for his ranking. He is only beholden to himself. If he chooses to do something, nothing but his own choices is holding him back.
This type of man is at once invisible to, and very attractive to, women. Invisible because he may or may not choose to be noticed, and because some women don't understand what a real alpha is. They have been brainwashed into thinking only guys like Dwayne Johnson and Arnold Schwartzenegger are "alpha". They don't look twice at guys who don't fit that stereotype, unless they happen to get to know him. Then, his natural traits are going to trigger her natural attraction, to whatever degree her brainwashing has not subverted it.
This type of man is very attractive to women because once she notices him, once she realizes what he is, she's going to have attraction triggered naturally and automatically as a result. Different women will be more or less attracted to individual men who are TAs, but there will almost always be attraction resulting from his natural displays of his achieving some or all of his highest potentials as a man.
AM6 is about improving the man, and everything else is a natural consequence. And yes, I agree, I should not have added a SM lead in. That will not be present in AM7.
