Two nights of running 9 loops of Version B - multiple formats - moderately loud, headphones, FLAC.
Last night, 6 loops, Version B, hybrid, headphones, loud, FLAC.
Having dreams, just can't recall them. This is a small change, as I wouldn't even wake up thinking I had any dreams at all (even though I am aware we all dream every night, regardless of level of recall).
Lots of resistance. Today thoughts of DMSI "not working" (lol) and frustration. I am sexually frustrated, at the moment. We're just passed the 6 week mark, so my wife has been cleared for sex, but we can't because - lucky her - she is suddenly getting her period, even though she's breastfeeding. WTF.
I'm also frustrated by the fact that my wife isn't responding to the program in the ways I want her to. My dream is to turn her into my personal sexually-experimental nymphomaniac. But, we've got a long way to go.
I feel like the state shifting is overcoming my caffeine usage, in the sense that I don't feel affected by caffeine much anymore. I'm sure it has something to do with being exhausted from A.) My workouts, B.) Parenting an energetic 3-year-old and a constantly crying infant, C.) 9 loops of B two nights, 6 loops the next, D.) Stress from last week/mother-in-law.
About to head to the gym for some "me" time, and to see what ego-boosting IOIs are in-store for me today.
Haha...cheers to sexual frustration.
I wonder if your wife already having had kids with you is a factor.
I am really looking forward to seeing how she reacts to the effects of 3.2 and beyond.
I'm gonna be blunt here because there's no other way to say it and I want to legitimately make this suggestion: have you considered breast feeding to help her along and also as foreplay?
(06-24-2017, 11:22 PM)apollolux Wrote: [ -> ]I'm gonna be blunt here because there's no other way to say it and I want to legitimately make this suggestion: have you considered breast feeding to help her along and also as foreplay?
Hey, man, when it comes to sex - I'm open-minded. I could be a downright freak. I'd mess with anything but...feces.
Unfortunately for me, most things get thrown into the "weird" category for her. And if it's "weird," it ain't happenin'.
Btw, I like blunt, so blunt away anytime you like.
Haven't felt this shitty for "no reason," (though we all know the reason) for a long time.
Pit o' Despair.
I got the Paintbrush of Negativity out, and lots of paint. Everything's gettin' a thick coat.
I don't know if those two days of 9 loops are just catching up to me, or what. Last night was back to 2 loops.
All of this was tipped off by reading an article about playing sex games to spice up your sex life. A lot of them sounded like an awesome time. Just knowing my wife would never be up for doing any of it really upset me. I feel like I'm missing out, and I'm going to be living the life of a monk and a missionary until I'm the old guy no one finds attractive anymore. Man, I'm just drowning at the bottom of a pity pool right now.
This, too, shall pass. Some part of me is about to give up, change, and open up a better world - whatever that may be.
Not tryin' to kick you while you're down, but it's good to know that what they say about marriage is true.
If I were you, I'd get a side dish.
(06-25-2017, 07:33 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]Not tryin' to kick you while you're down, but it's good to know that what they say about marriage is true.
If I were you, I'd get a side dish.
What, that married men get more sex over a lifetime than single men? That's true.
Of course, there are deviations to that statistic. I'd say, if you know sex is going to be a cornerstone for you, find a relationship with a woman (or women, plural, lol) who is on your level. Trying to get them to change for you is difficult at best.
My wife has said multiple times, with the intention of me "reading between the lines," that if I need a side dish, to make sure it happens in a way that will never involve or embarrass her. I'm not sure I'd ever go there, but if this program can't get her to where I need her to be, I'm not sure I'll have much of a choice. I refuse to be miserable (or make her miserable b/c I'm miserable), but I'm not going to trade my family for the "chance" of finding a new woman just for sex. Having a legit mistress, who has no strings or need for a relationship, would be the only way to go in that case.
(06-25-2017, 07:41 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ] (06-25-2017, 07:33 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]Not tryin' to kick you while you're down, but it's good to know that what they say about marriage is true.
If I were you, I'd get a side dish.
What, that married men get more sex over a lifetime than single men? That's true.
Umm, yeah. That was it.
(06-25-2017, 07:41 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]Of course, there are deviations to that statistic. I'd say, if you know sex is going to be a cornerstone for you, find a relationship with a woman (or women, plural, lol) who is on your level. Trying to get them to change for you is difficult at best.
My wife has said multiple times, with the intention of me "reading between the lines," that if I need a side dish, to make sure it happens in a way that will never involve or embarrass her. I'm not sure I'd ever go there, but if this program can't get her to where I need her to be, I'm not sure I'll have much of a choice. I refuse to be miserable (or make her miserable b/c I'm miserable), but I'm not going to trade my family for the "chance" of finding a new woman just for sex. Having a legit mistress, who has no strings or need for a relationship, would be the only way to go in that case.
I'm sure lots of guys do it. The only question is: will you?
(06-25-2017, 07:41 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ] (06-25-2017, 07:33 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]Not tryin' to kick you while you're down, but it's good to know that what they say about marriage is true.
If I were you, I'd get a side dish.
What, that married men get more sex over a lifetime than single men? That's true.
Of course, there are deviations to that statistic. I'd say, if you know sex is going to be a cornerstone for you, find a relationship with a woman (or women, plural, lol) who is on your level. Trying to get them to change for you is difficult at best.
My wife has said multiple times, with the intention of me "reading between the lines," that if I need a side dish, to make sure it happens in a way that will never involve or embarrass her. I'm not sure I'd ever go there, but if this program can't get her to where I need her to be, I'm not sure I'll have much of a choice. I refuse to be miserable (or make her miserable b/c I'm miserable), but I'm not going to trade my family for the "chance" of finding a new woman just for sex. Having a legit mistress, who has no strings or need for a relationship, would be the only way to go in that case.
Whatever you ultimately choose to do Brother, I would say to you to remember that it doesn't mean you love your wife or family any less. Sometimes, life just happens in certain ways and when you need to scratch an itch, you need to scratch an itch. At the end of the day though, it will only ever be an itch that you scratched, and nothing more than that.
Geezuz, today was rough. I'm just now starting to feel a little better.
Here's a summary:
I haven't cleaned the pipes thrice in one day for a decade. Today was the day, lol.
I've felt energy flowing through my limbs whenever I'm laid out on the couch.
Had a mild identity crisis for about a half hour where I literally felt like I didn't know who I was, no path/no purpose, other than a father and husband. Don't know what that was about.
At lunch, I got irritated checking out a cute blonde, b/c she wasn't looking my way. I angrily visualized throwing her over table, ripping her clothes off, pulling her thong so hard it snapped...Completely violent! It was like a subconscious temper tantrum! I would never do that in reality, but the weird thing is afterward I felt better and she made sure to come up to me and shyly tell me to have a nice day as I headed toward the door. It's like I let go of something that cleared the way for attraction to occur.
Already researched the loops for tonight. 5 is the magic number.
May be seeing the good ole SIL tomorrow.
(06-25-2017, 07:17 PM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]At lunch, I got irritated checking out a cute blonde, b/c she wasn't looking my way. I angrily visualized throwing her over table, ripping her clothes off, pulling her thong so hard it snapped...Completely violent!
[...]
weird thing is afterward I felt better and she made sure to come up to me and shyly tell me to have a nice day as I headed toward the door.
Interesting.
I've had similar daydreams and girls always respond in much the same way as you described.
Watched The Bachelorette with my wife last night. There was a date where the chick took one of the guys on a one-on-one. He was "everything she wanted," on paper. He was an attorney, had perfect teeth, good skin, good looking, dressed well, was clearly intelligent, witty...
But he creeped the fuck out of my wife and me. I mean, we just couldn't put our finger on what was wrong, but we both shuddered multiple times as we watched them interact. He even had a cool name - "Jack Stone," like straight out of a Grishem novel or something. My wife said, "I don't think anyone has ever creeped me out through a television like this before..." She was right.
I'm sure this guy doesn't understand what's "wrong," with him. Good looking, well dressed, groomed, well spoken, intelligent, good career, makes money...and none of it matters, because he has baaaad energy. Needless to say, The Bachelorette sent him packing, and he looked as if he didn't understand, but that it was what always happens to him. I am going to try and get a clip of it posted to see what y'all think.
Here's a clip. I didn't watch it again, but it's 4 minutes long, so should show what I'm talking about. You'll see:
Jack Stone Clip