10 loops of ultrasonic caught up to me days after, so if you find yourself absolutely exhausted during the week ahead, remember your 9 loops on Day 97.
(06-07-2017, 11:29 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]10 loops of ultrasonic caught up to me days after, so if you find yourself absolutely exhausted during the week ahead, remember your 9 loops on Day 97.
I'm not scared of exhaustion, I'm scared of anxiety. And so far I can manage it, even if only barely sometimes.
Day 98 - 1 + 1 loops
This was the first night in a long time when I could not sleep while listening to the hybrid. So I turned it off and feel asleep quite quickly. In fact last 10 minutes I simply suffered trough, wanting the loop to end so I can get this over with. My subconscious really send me a signal to end this earlier this time.
Other than that there is not too much to say. There are some results here and there but nothing mayor. My ex is acting a bit strange, sending me pieces of information instead of talking. Even if I try to hold the conversation I cannot as she won't reply for long. She won't bother to talk, but she does bother to send random message everyday.
Day 99 - 2 loops
Day 100 - 9 loops
Two things worth noting. First I lost 5kg these past 2 months, including 0.5kg this week alone. My weight was always issue for me and I would keep my weight out of fear of being attractive, so this is huge progress for me. I'm back to my best weight in my adult life and this is probably due to DMSI healing. So cheers for that, it is worth running this sub just for that.
Second this is I think my female friend starts fancying me, for an introvert she's extremely nice and goes out of her way to contact me. There is no flirting or excessive IoIs so far but something is up. Sadly, while she has great character, she's not my type and she is quite religious, so pursuing her would be kind of vain. Still at least something is happening.
Day 101 - 1 loop
I had a bad case of "I cannot sleep while listening to DMSI" kind of thing so I stopped at 1 loop. Even worse it was the first time since Easter that I could not fall asleep. Thankfully my female friend I was talking about last post helped me out with some conversations before I finally went to bed 4 hours later. Still I woke up on time and even not terribly tired.
Day 102 - 0 loops
Yep, 0 loops this time. And still yesterday was hulluva day.
I got sick. Quite badly. I was pucking like a cat actually and I have no idea why. Sure, I drunk some beer, but I can drink twice as much and be swinging on the swing no problem. I have no idea what hit me. Even now I do not feel my best, which is bad given I still have lots of work to catch up.
What was most interesting though were things about my sweetheart. I masturbated to her, something I was doing a lot in the past but maybe twice this year, and it was very spontaneous. I simply had a random thought about her and got to work.
But what's more interesting was that I dreamed about her that night. I were in a bus, going to some kind of event with my friends from Uni. Then suddenly she appeared, absolutely ignoring me like I was air. Then I realized this was a dream and I stood up and started making out with her. She was resistant but she would not push me away. The best thing is I could feel everything with my tongue and I could taste her. And while I can use all my senses while imagining things it never happens to me in dreams. I think it might have been the most vivid dream I've ever had.
I have no idea why she came back to my thoughts after all this time. Throughout entire DMSI run she gave me no sign, no IoI, no message. Interesting and almost a bit troubling as, given my history with her, she is the only person right now that could give me severe case of oneitis.
Day 103 - 1 loop
Day 104 - 6 loops
I've met with one of my DMSI girls yesterday. She still has boyfriend so I wasn't even trying to flirt with her more than simply friends do. Also if she was sending me any IoIs I could not possibly notice because of her neurosis (she was playing with her beer can so hard she cut herself o.O ). Anyhow it was very fun time, said some very interesting things as we were on our nth beer and conversation turned into relationships and such. Apparently she loves spending time with me and she was thinking about meeting me sooner but she knew she wouldn't have too much time and she'd rather spend some quality time with me. In other words heavy friendzone but I don't mind, while she's very cute there are some red lights and she's great friend to have anyhow.
I spoke with my ex how I do not like the way she's been treating me recently (i.e. I spoke my mind instead of being passive-aggressive) and it gave results. My today's texting with her was lots of fun and laughs. If I am to do something with her yet I need to be upfront with her and break her barriers that arose due to fear and disappointment of our relationship and today showed that something might still come out of this.
Day 105 - ? loops
Player on my phone turned off during the night so I have no idea how many loops I've done. It's not the first time this would happen, but most cases it would be due to my headphones' jack disconnecting, this time I have no idea what happened.
Resistance is high, I'm on my last strife to have everything done on my work but it's still stressful. I'm catching myself thinking I want to stop listening to DMSI but I will not do that unless I'll have to. To be honest I'm very mad at myself right now for procrastinating so long, if I were to do some work month or two ago instead of now I would be so much less stressed and quality of the work would be so much better as well (I feel I'm doing crappy job right now and it doesn't help my self-esteem as well).
Day 106 - 7 loops
Something's wrong, and seriously so. Yesterday for the first time in my life I had panic attack. Not to serious, but given a task all I could do is stare at it and do nothing, I was so paralyzed. It was late, around 10 PM, so I decided to just go to sleep and while it took me a while to fall asleep I calmed down a little.
Interestingly I had a nightmare that night, I was somewhere in the village, it was at night and I was small. I was scared of all the animals there and I was frantically trying to find my way home. Only after I started to scream for help I grew in size and path lighted for me. When I got to the front door I found people on their way to find me. Dream ended as I was lying on the bed trying to fall asleep.
Day 114
Long time no update for good reason. I went to
one week long camp and I returned yesterday. I knew I won't be able to listen to DMSI on regular basis during this time, so I decided to do an experiment and switched to version B. I ended up listening to about 20-25 loops all that time and those are my results.
First of all
I felt fine. I didn't feel too burdened and I was actually surprisingly light, given I don't enjoy trips like that very much. I was certainly more extroverted than usually and has quite good time all around.
As for women I didn't "score" anything, but there were some interesting IoIs, looks here and there etc. The most interesting one by the long shot was woman in her early 30s (which means quite older than me), divorcee with 3 kids. She was nice and shy, introverted and 9/10 on my scale. I swear she would glance at me every time we saw each other, but every time I made a move
she would run away. First time, during the lunch, she was sitting alone on the table and she left as soon as I asked if I can join her. Second time, during the party, I was dancing with her and she run away from me when I was trying to do some dance moves with her :/
On older fronts not much has happened, my ex plays the game of "you don't understand me so I will not bother to reach out to you so you can understand me". I explained to her that if we don't talk and try to reach out to each other all I can do is guess what she wants and thinks, and my guess is that she's simply manipulating and playing me. I'm getting to tired of playing with her to be honest, it's simply stops being worth the bother. Sure, she is scared just as me, but at least I'm trying to reach out, and not just waiting for who knows what. There were some minor things with other DMSI girls, but nothing worth the mention.
All in all version B was fun for me,
I will be running it a bit as I feel better on it, much less anxious and I even kinda sorta get some results. Also I have slight feeling something interesting might happen on Tuesday, so I wanna be ready for that if it happens
Middle aged women tend to run away from what they want if they assess that it reminds them of a previous experience that went bad. This will especially be true if she has kids, and moreso with more kids.
(06-24-2017, 11:55 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Middle aged women tend to run away from what they want if they assess that it reminds them of a previous experience that went bad. This will especially be true if she has kids, and moreso with more kids.
It's a shame, I've never been with MILF before and she was exactly my type (and I mean exactly, like if I were to imagine her beforehand she wouldn't fit so well!). And not only in looks, but also aptitude and character. As I said before, she was very shy and introverted, she run away from both encounters I initialized (first time during the lunch she left food at the table, second time during the dance she left in the middle of the song), which made me like her even more but it might have made her even more reluctant than most.
Still, damn, if I were to think a couple of months ago I would be going after a MILF I would laugh at myself...
Day 118
I always looked suspiciously at the fact, that Shannon's models tell him to run DMSI for financial success. Well...
I do not want to give you much details as it's private but I got very big scholarship today. I mean average salary in my country big monthly and for a couple of years! This is huge and even now, a couple of hours after I found out, I still cannot believe it. This will allow me to do what I wanted to do, but was hesitant because of financial reasons, with no worry whatsoever!
I was suspicious of it too, and I ran the models a lot to verify it. It strongly appears to be the ultra success programming and the programming for breaking through resistance and obstacles that is why I was being directed to run it for financial success: BAMM was not powerful enough to overcome the subtle resistance I was experiencing. But DMSI did it in less than a month, and now here I set with a brand new car and I'm definitely on my way to a lot of success financially.
I don't always understand why the models say what they do... but when they repeat themselves for days or weeks at a time, they've never been wrong yet.
(06-29-2017, 01:49 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]I was suspicious of it too, and I ran the models a lot to verify it. It strongly appears to be the ultra success programming and the programming for breaking through resistance and obstacles that is why I was being directed to run it for financial success: BAMM was not powerful enough to overcome the subtle resistance I was experiencing. But DMSI did it in less than a month, and now here I set with a brand new car and I'm definitely on my way to a lot of success financially.
I don't always understand why the models say what they do... but when they repeat themselves for days or weeks at a time, they've never been wrong yet.
It's amazing how a program not designed for wealth has done more to achieve that end than BAMM.
Can't wait to see how BAMM 3.0 turns out!!