Man, navigating my own mind has been one of the most difficult things for me in my life. So many twists and turns, distractions, tactics. I'm learning more and more that my obsession with over analyzing stuff and procrastinating is due to my belief that I can prevent any type of unfavorable circumstance if I'm just careful enough. With the healing in DMSI I was trying to cover absolutely everything, fix it all 100%, then move on with my life.
It's like a really bad feedback loop. Being really afraid of potential stuff that could go wrong in life -----> hold off and prepare, avoid facing fear------> never face fear, never overcome fear ------> back to the start with being afraid.
Every time in the past I tried to push myself I was met with a feeling that it was a bad idea, and I listened to it. My mind was always like "No! Wait, we need to figure all this out first!" And so I'd ruminate and get nowhere. Waiting until I felt I was ready to take on challenges was the worst thing I ever did because in life I don't think you're ever ready. There's always going to be surprises and things you don't know and if you try and control that all the time it's just going to be a bad time all around.
One other thing I realized, I have to take personal responsibility for this fear. I'd often use it as an excuse, like telling myself the fear was so big and insurmountable, so it wasn't my fault. But regardless of where it comes from it's me, assuming it existed in some isolated untouchable part of my mind closed the door to ever overcoming it.
One loop and I can already tell just how much power 3.2 has. I can physically feel how much it's working. Especially with the aura. With 3.1 I don't think I ever felt the aura while listening.
I'm going to try to keep this journal as updated as possible without it getting redundant. But prior to this I was a little wishy washy with dmsi's goals. I told myself I'd just do the healing, I didn't need the women. But now I'm like screw it, let's see what happens. I told myself I wasn't the type of guy to sleep with a bunch of women but now I'm pretty sure that's where I'm heading lol. Kinda feels like I'm on a rollercoaster right now and I just need to sit back and enjoy the ride.
But talk is cheap and results are what's going to determine if I'm executing or not. But from running one loop I can already see how much stronger this reality is going to get.
(02-23-2018, 05:07 PM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]One loop and I can already tell just how much power 3.2 has. I can physically feel how much it's working. Especially with the aura. With 3.1 I don't think I ever felt the aura while listening.
I'm going to try to keep this journal as updated as possible without it getting redundant. But prior to this I was a little wishy washy with dmsi's goals. I told myself I'd just do the healing, I didn't need the women. But now I'm like screw it, let's see what happens. I told myself I wasn't the type of guy to sleep with a bunch of women but now I'm pretty sure that's where I'm heading lol. Kinda feels like I'm on a rollercoaster right now and I just need to sit back and enjoy the ride.
But talk is cheap and results are what's going to determine if I'm executing or not. But from running one loop I can already see how much stronger this reality is going to get.
That is pretty neat that you can feel the power of 3.2 on your first day but something cut my attention when you said you're not the type of guy to sleep with a bunch of women I tell you what my friend from experience it is hella fun to have beautiful women throwing themselves at you haha I'm sure you're going to love it guaranteed
(02-23-2018, 05:14 PM)Sanbosay Wrote: [ -> ] (02-23-2018, 05:07 PM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]One loop and I can already tell just how much power 3.2 has. I can physically feel how much it's working. Especially with the aura. With 3.1 I don't think I ever felt the aura while listening.
I'm going to try to keep this journal as updated as possible without it getting redundant. But prior to this I was a little wishy washy with dmsi's goals. I told myself I'd just do the healing, I didn't need the women. But now I'm like screw it, let's see what happens. I told myself I wasn't the type of guy to sleep with a bunch of women but now I'm pretty sure that's where I'm heading lol. Kinda feels like I'm on a rollercoaster right now and I just need to sit back and enjoy the ride.
But talk is cheap and results are what's going to determine if I'm executing or not. But from running one loop I can already see how much stronger this reality is going to get.
That is pretty neat that you can feel the power of 3.2 on your first day but something cut my attention when you said you're not the type of guy to sleep with a bunch of women I tell you what my friend from experience it is hella fun to have beautiful women throwing themselves at you haha I'm sure you're going to love it guaranteed
Haha, no doubt. I think I just have a lot of "nice guy" programming still drilled into me. A lot of talk goes on about women and shame regarding sex. Men are shamed just as much and I think I internalized that.
So I wrote in Sarge's journal about my car's suspension breaking. Well turns out it was body rot. This car is old, 1993, and it was a beater. No more money is going into it. I told myself screw this, I'm doing a lot of mileage now and I need a reliable car so I'm going to be financing a used one. I'm buying a 2011 subaru legacy. Why I feel this is relevant to DMSI haha? Well for as long as I've been alive I've always lived in the broken reality, the one where I just get by, I'm not allowed to have nice things, I just have to settle for "good enough". But I feel like that old car is practically a metaphor for me breaking away from a old limiting reality and embracing a new one. I'm by no means splurging on this car, it's well within my ability to pay off. But a few months ago I was convinced I was just going to keep buying crappy car after crappy car.
It's not women related, but to me I see this as progress towards breaking out of a very limited scarcity filled mentality.
So onto DMSI. Part of the issue with me is I don't go out too much. I work mon-friday. All the women at my job are either married or in a relationship. While I did notice them all getting increasingly friendly with me, it's hard to say. If I notice anything more obvious I'll obviously write it down, but for now I'm pretty sure it's the celebrity effect. Sometimes I go out to the bar with friends friday. But the weekends are for my music really. To some extent I do believe I was avoiding women before and isolating myself with the music, but a part of me definitely feels a drive to make music my priority over this getting women thing. Now what I'm thinking is maybe DMSI will push me further with my music goals, get me to pick up DJing or something, eventually playing live shows and as a consequence of that meet more women I'm into. It's a long shot, but I could see it happening.
As for the physical effects of DMSI. Body heat, so much body heat. These past few days I feel like a furnace which is funny because I used to be cold 90% of the time. When listening to my loop I feel the resistance, it gets bypassed, my body heats up, then I feel this almost magnetic feeling sensation around my whole body. So far it feels like I'm getting further with 3.2 than 3.1 which is a good sign.
Don't you work in a supermarket? Or aren't you there anymore?
I guess if you're just stacking shelves then you aren't interacting with customers. But I worked on the checkouts from when I was 18 and that was when I did the best with women because i'd talk to so many, it was kind of like they were coming up to me as I was serving them. I miss that now.
(02-25-2018, 04:19 PM)Benjamin Wrote: [ -> ]Don't you work in a supermarket? Or aren't you there anymore?
I guess if you're just stacking shelves then you aren't interacting with customers. But I worked on the checkouts from when I was 18 and that was when I did the best with women because i'd talk to so many, it was kind of like they were coming up to me as I was serving them. I miss that now.
Nah, not anymore. I moved up lol. I'm working in IT now. Thank god I'm out of retail. But yeah that would have been a pretty good environment to test DMSI
Please share with me how the resistance feels compared to 3.1, how fast it gets bypassed, and what you think is causing the bypass.
(02-26-2018, 08:46 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Please share with me how the resistance feels compared to 3.1, how fast it gets bypassed, and what you think is causing the bypass.
Sure, I'll do my best. It's kinda of hard to put it into words but I'll try. The resistance in 3.2 feels a bit like anger or irritation, but more mild. Sort of like a minor discomfort. In 3.1 it would be more like a rage that made it harder to get things done. Also with 3.1 resistance manifested as hopelessness and despair, I'd have days where I'd lay in bed because a combination of the anxiety from life and feeling unable to overcome challenges made me feel paralyzed. I don't get that in 3.2, so far it redirects me automatically towards work I need to do to improve my life. I can try to be miserable and hopeless but it just flat out won't work because it now feels wrong or damaging. I'd say the resistance is bypassed in about 2 minutes. I honestly think it's due to the anxiety relief. It kills that super heightened fearful state. Once that happens it's like my conscious and subconscious can communicate better because my subconscious isn't in full on panic mode. Did you add depression relief aid as well? If so that might also be causing the bypass by eliminating that hopelessness that has resulted in learned helplessness in the past.
Anything else don't hesitate to ask. I'm trying to avoid getting too hyped up about 3.2 lol. So far things feel good and I'm not used to that, so I think I might be exaggerating or imagining things at times. Usually due to anxiety I'm always expecting really bad things to happen when I'm in these more positive states.
Quote:Also with 3.1 resistance manifested as hopelessness and despair, I'd have days where I'd lay in bed because a combination of the anxiety from life and feeling unable to overcome challenges made me feel paralyzed. I don't get that in 3.2, so far it redirects me automatically towards work I need to do to improve my life.
Very cool. That is a big difference. I can point to similar on several other subliminals AM, WM, E2.. i'd just not care about anything in a bad way, just want to play games, watch movies and do nothing and just be like "fuck the world".
Instead if that is channeled into diong things to improve your life.. that's fucking awesome! I like it. Hopefully it'll have a similar effect for me when I eventually use 3.2.
(02-26-2018, 10:31 PM)Benjamin Wrote: [ -> ]Quote:Also with 3.1 resistance manifested as hopelessness and despair, I'd have days where I'd lay in bed because a combination of the anxiety from life and feeling unable to overcome challenges made me feel paralyzed. I don't get that in 3.2, so far it redirects me automatically towards work I need to do to improve my life.
Very cool. That is a big difference. I can point to similar on several other subliminals AM, WM, E2.. i'd just not care about anything in a bad way, just want to play games, watch movies and do nothing and just be like "**** the world".
Instead if that is channeled into diong things to improve your life.. that's ***** awesome! I like it. Hopefully it'll have a similar effect for me when I eventually use 3.2.
Absolutely. I was always really bad with that. I really think it's just procrastination and procrastination stems from anxiety. Most people procrastinate in some form. I really think it'll work for you too.
So another update. I think I broke through the first layer of resistance and now I'm being hit with something even deeper. It's like 3.2 is drilling down hard. It keeps pushing me along, even if I get anxious or whatever type of distraction I'm always returning back to the goal. One thing I do notice is the effects are much more pronounced when I'm at home. I think part of me thinks executing DMSI in the work place is inappropriate. But it's gonna happen, I can feel it. It's really just an on or off switch for being sexy and at this point I'd rather just have it on and to stop worrying.
I do however notice something that might be good to report. At moments during the day I'll find myself sort of zoning out, body heat goes up, aura feels more powerful. It's like my brain diverts all it's processing power towards execution and I can't focus on anything else. But the good part is this is very brief, maybe 2 or 3 minutes. It's like a rest period for my brain to soak in whatever DMSI is sticking in there. Not sure if that's an intended effect or my minds reaction to the power of the sub.
Can't really report too much on reactions from women. But I've noticed an increase in shit testing. Nothing too abrasive, just almost like they are trying to get a rise out of me and I'm chill about it. I just laugh.
But yeah sitting here I feel myself executing a lot more. I wonder if it has to do with feeling safe? Or maybe just because I'm not working my mind can dedicate all it's power towards executing.
One more thing. Sleep is a bit weird lately. I notice when I really relax for the day and go to bed I start executing the script hard. My body heats up, sometimes I'll get these intense sexual visuals and scenarios, and it feels similar to when you're wired from drinking coffee. I'm not complaining though, I'd rather this than resisting during sleep. Perhaps when it balances out more during the day and I'm executing 100% of the time it will be more steady. Right now it sort of feels like I hold back a bit and once I'm really relaxed I'm flooded by all the stuff I was resisting.
Hmmm really interesting. I'm just going to keep journaling the whole inner workings of DMSI. I'm really attuned to how my subconscious behaves now and the things it does to derail me. One thing, it's a bit like OCD, I'll feel like I need to go inside myself and prepare or figure out something. It's hard to explain, but you know when you have a problem and you try to think of the solution? But you can't solve the problem and you sort of keep hitting that wall? And even though you hit the wall, you just want to solve it so you keep obsessing on it. Haha, just realized maybe this is my subconscious trying to figure out how to bypass the wall and it can't. Interesting how that was the first word that popped into my head when thinking of metaphors.
All I know is that I have to stay on track. At this point it feels like a mental itch I want to scratch. But when I do there's nothing there or no relief. Which is good because then my mind doesn't have things to dwell on and procrastinate with. However that initial impulse is rather annoying, I'm hoping as I get further down the line my mind is more aligned with the goals of DMSI and I don't have this back and forth thing as much where it feels like 2 sides pulling back and forth.
And it begins. Found my headphones pulled out of my mp3 player this morning as well as from my ears. Going to be switching to speakers. It may not give perfect stereo integration but at least I'll know I'm getting consistent exposure. On the weekends I'll use headphones during the day. But during the work week I just don't have time so the only option is listening at night. Going to be setting the speakers up on both sides of my head to the best of my ability.
We'll see what happens. I have a suspicion that I've been cutting off the sub early at night and not getting the full loop. So I have to close that escape route.
Well after running my loop with speakers it's clear that these past few days I wasn't getting all of dmsi. Going to be treating today like day one and starting over with the 14 day count. The resistance I ran into recently must have been due to not being exposed to the entire loop. Lesson learned, if you're going to use headphones at night make sure they stay on your head. In my case I'd be half asleep and pull them off once I didn't want to listen to dmsi anymore. Speakers worked great and I feel noticeably better today.