I am preparing this journal in time for the release of DMSI 3.2
I seem to be a stonewaller so im going for DMSI to see how it does for me.
I am eager for DMSI's healing and clearing to work on me more than anything else right now.
If it will work on me and will be much more stronger than E2 (EPRHA) than awesome!
Listening will be done via AudioEngine A2+ speakers at night, connected to my S4 Samsung phone, and volume will be set to around 7/15 (same as Shannon) on the S4 and the A2+ will be at max.
I have no idea as yet if there will be 2 tracks, an A track for clearing and a B track for the goal so will wait to see. If there are 2 tracks, im going to be super focused on track A for healing and hopefully this is the track that has "THE WALL" that can break through my stonewalling/resistence etc.
I also have no idea as yet about the number of loops etc so this will be revealed upon release.
Finally..... I cant wait to get started
and share my experiences.
ps: I chose the Heart Emoji for this thread, as its the only thing I could find releated to the sub and also to reaching into me deep and getting through my resistance.
For anyone new: My previous journal was MLS 5.5G.
My learning from that are:
I am still a heavy procrastinator in regards to studying.
I am a sub resistant chap, also known as a stonewaller.
I have trouble listening consistently but im fixing that!
New Learning: Today (12th Feb 2018) I had the realisation that I may have some level of social anxiety. I do get anxious however small when I go out and I am conscious of how I appear - basically I always hope I am seeming and looking hotter and sexier than I do.
Thanks for reading and sharing me on my journey of discovery.
Here's hoping we can make progress with you.
Buddy there is this App in Playstore.. Called Macrodroid. I have configured it to play the sub everyday on 10 pm and pause at 4 am.
This way I don't bother about it and I can really set and forget.
Thanks alot Shannon
Zane, thank you ill take a look at that app later today after uni
An early update (because unsure if its TID or just me)
So today in class, is this girl, from russia whose pregnant with her 3rd baby and shes showing only a mild bump.
Today in class she was at times looking straight into my eyes. I looked back of course and looked straight into her right eye - I dont know much about where to look when it comes to eye contact, is it the eyes, the nose, in between the eyes etc.
Anyway at 1 point she came and sat in front of me, and well I thought it isnt anything anyone would look deeply into but I was simply because I know I will start DMSI even though DMSI itself isnt my immediate concern lol
That being said, at times I do feel that Im getting more attention from female friends that I already know - and by attention I mean more smiles but this could also be due to it being the start of a new semester and were all seeing each other again.
So the above is just something im thinking is worth putting here for now.
Another change in me is that i am exercising. For the past 3 or 4 days now, ive managed to do 10mins quick pace on my stationary exercise bike (with 5 mins warmup and 5mins cool down before and after the 10mins).
I am also more disciplined in making a to do list of things to do and get done.
I am not studying and 1 of the reasons I have realised is a lack of trust in my self in knowing how to study. I know how to cram but I actually know the best way to study, im not sure. The solution is that I had been talking to another tutor from the USA but until he now reads my email in which I share how the uni is set up there is little more to be gained from him.
Another I have been in contact with is an academic coach and she has told me its best to purchase her course which may answer all the questions I have regarding studying and I havent purchased it as I have been focused on other things from my to-do list as well as attending class - this the first week of the new semester - and also fitting in 20mins exercise as per above.
This all has been in the planning for this semester since January I believe if not since xmas but im actually doing it which is a relief.
Another big major change is that im slowly/daily reshifting my sleep from crazy time in the early morning to a more sensible time.
I am waking earlier too. The ultimate aim is to sleep by 8.30/9pm and to wake around 5.45/6am every day so that I can get in an early cardio, and an evening bodyweight session, and in between get in class and self studying time.
Thanks for reading and feel free to offer any feedback and insights please. thanks
Hmmm... It does looks like u r Experiencing TID effects. I guess this also means that DMSI 3.2 will work pretty well on u.
(02-13-2018, 10:27 AM)Zane Wrote: [ -> ]Hmmm... It does looks like u r Experiencing TID effects. I guess this also means that DMSI 3.2 will work pretty well on u.
I hope so
but dont want this to be just me trying so hard to make it work via TID lol
(02-13-2018, 11:03 AM)Jake2015 Wrote: [ -> ] (02-13-2018, 10:27 AM)Zane Wrote: [ -> ]Hmmm... It does looks like u r Experiencing TID effects. I guess this also means that DMSI 3.2 will work pretty well on u.
I hope so but dont want this to be just me trying so hard to make it work via TID lol
As long as it works, it doesn`t matter how
(02-13-2018, 11:31 AM)cataleya Wrote: [ -> ] (02-13-2018, 11:03 AM)Jake2015 Wrote: [ -> ] (02-13-2018, 10:27 AM)Zane Wrote: [ -> ]Hmmm... It does looks like u r Experiencing TID effects. I guess this also means that DMSI 3.2 will work pretty well on u.
I hope so but dont want this to be just me trying so hard to make it work via TID lol
As long as it works, it doesn`t matter how
haha so true! thanks alot Cataleya
2nd update:
Im gonna keep updating until I start using DMSI if I notice anything thats out of the ordinary in any way.
So besides exercising on my bike for 3 days (I made it easy by saying that every evening after uni, I get back to my apartment and hit that bike and stretch before I eat - I plan on making it harder to procrastinate on this), I have tried to get more organised etc.
Last night I couldnt sleep at all until 6am, even though I was in bed from 11pm.
I just couldnt get to sleep and my brain was so active it was shocking to be honest. (I decided not to exercise on my bike today and have a rest, just in case it was the exercise that kept me awake this 1 time).
I did eventually sleep for a few hours not alot, but I dreamed. It was a very vivid dream and maybe it was about love or something im not sure but I woke thinking that since its a dream which I dont usually have or remember then its worth mentioning when I get on but ive forgotten what the dream was exactly.
Besides the dream, today my friend came over and showed me how to use Google Drive so I can share my files and notes across all my devices and boy have I have been behind times, this Sh:t is good lol
We however wasted 3.5hrs of study to actually sort it out because a large PDF textbook wasnt being viewed on my tablet but its been sorted now.
We went to play pool, im still rubbish at that lol but I wasnt in the mood because we wasted so much valuable study time.
The study time is stressing me because already 2 days into the new semester, we have a strict teacher that wants us to be prepared for the next lesson next week, we have a test with another teacher in another subject next week and this week I have to read and prepare for a class on friday. so yeah not enough time.
I got my hair cut, came home and then ate.
Nothing new to report except that for the past 1hr or so whilst ive been updating my google drive with more files, I got a message from a girl that was in my year who fell a year down to 2nd year.
I dont necessarily fancy this girl but she is female so im not going to complain.
I had messaged her on facebook in october as she wasnt on my friends list. I had heard she had a bf and that she fell a year due to smoking weed. ive never heard of anyone fall a year for smoking now and again but anyway so she messages me today and conversation continued until I closed it down moments before coming here to type this, as I want to hit the shower and get ready for bed.
So the conversation was that its valentines and shes lonely and single. I didnt take the bait immediately as she could be messaging me for that reason or for a reason such as stupid students wanting to tease me or see if I take the bait like some naive chump.
Anyway she then reveals that her bf did dump her, and it was today of all days lol and that he got her into weed and she smoked it every 30mins affecting her head and thus exams and she fell back a year and feels bad and promises to make this year better and hasnt smoked for over a day ago hahaha so oh well good luck to her on that front.
Anyway I was doing my google drive while replying to her and have now taken her snap chat and added her where I can chat to her there if I want.
thats all to report for now.
any thoughts?
oh oh oh and ps, 1 more thing : I forgot to mention that yup I think im procrastinating on actually studying for the various lessons mentioned above :/
3rd Update:
So again no idea if all this is in my head, or if its TID or if its absolutely nothing and just my RAS (reticular activating system) looking for things since it knows that im going to go on DMSI and this is from a stone waller but ill begin....
So today I had to go to my physiotherapists for sports massage. I go due to some previous injuries I sustained a long while ago.
Anyway there is a female therapist there, shes quite bi polar and sometimes friendly sometimes not.
Today she was super friendly and almost flirty with me and I noticed. When I went to my therapist, and he started on me I said to him that XXX seemed very happy didnt she and he laughed with me cos he also noticed it was bizarre for her.
I havent noticed anything else, I went to uni after and class was cancelled.
I walked home and a somewhat shy looking older female walked past and looked straight into my eyes but I cant read into that I suppose.
Im home now, made myself a cup of green tea (trying to be healthy lol) and sat to do some work, but instead of uni work (procrastination?) im going to watch a webinar that I started this morning on how to study. Hopefully this will help me feel more confident and not procrastinate.
On another note, I went to bed at midnight and set my alarm to wake at 6am. I need 9-10hrs sleep yet I was adamant that I would wake today early so that I can fix my sleep cycle.
The alarms on my phone went off and an hour later at 7am I woke. I was so happy because this is early and it revealed to me that I may need to set my alarm an hour earlier than I want to coax me out of my slumber.
Its now 3.41pm and the day seems to fly by.
If shannon can make a sub or add something into a sub that helps time slow down for us (since its relative) so that we get alot done and feel that we have got alot done then that would be truly awesome!
Im still hopeful that DMSI will work on me since it will the most powerful sub this side of the galaxy so bring it on!
3rd update part 2:
So time is 3.48pm, not long after I posted the last update above and a female friend that I sent some notes to on whatsapp has replied back with a simple thanksx.
She doesnt ever put an X at the end of her messages to me .... so hmmmmm lol
Besides that the girl who had that break up and was a weed smoker was messaging me on snapchat till i went to bed cos sleep comes first of course lol and then this morning too.
Im not doing anything except be in my own space and head and try and focus on what I need to which is study and exercise but all this is note worthy for now.
3rd update part 3:
Ok again im trying not to make this seem as if its TID but is it? I dunno but im posting here to look back in the hope something is happening and that my stonewalling is a long ago story lol....
Basically a girl that was a friend from last year got in touch. This girl and I were friends and she lived across the road from me and would come to mine to eat and study.
We had a fight, I still feel it was her fault and she mine and anyway everything stopped. This happened xmas of 2016.
Slowly slowly we got to being cordial in public and thats its, such as hi and all that jazz.
Now her friend became a good friend of mine, and this mutual friend would share info with me related to uni etc. The friend from the fight would share info with my friend and he to me.
Now today out of the blue she sent me some uni info. It wasnt at all expected and she could have sent it to my friend or to her and my mutual friend, to send to me.
I hope im not reading into this but anyway she sent it so I said thanks and thought fuck it and so asked how she was and she replied and then I did.
So thats all for now folks.
Looks like as the release date for DMSI is getting closer the TID effects are increasing.