Subliminal Talk

The strip clubs are obviously different in America. The ones i've been to all have a no touching policy.

Not that i've been to heaps, because all they do is frustrate me and it's a waste of money.

(04-06-2018, 10:12 PM)Zane Wrote: [ -> ]Damn! I don't think u should be dissappointed.. This a big step to be honest. I think DMSI is slowly opening up a path for u and changing ur perception so that u can work on urself

I hope so I really do

Saturday 7th April 2018 - (43-2.4A) - 2nd cycle, 4th Day
Time: 3.29am on Saturday 8th.
Listening to loop as I type this update.

Woke, no dreams.

Spoke to personal trainer, got my macros and havent looked back at the notes I made to plan the meals etc.

I realised that once I achieve something, such as speaking and getting answers from my trainer, I then become complacent, confident and this is what is my downfall.

I felt good today after having an awesome day yesterday with my friend.

I messaged potsgirl today, by forwarding a funny viral video. I did use it as an excuse to make contact. She responds to my jokes and we really get on and I did kinda of try and probe if she liked me, but she declined and remember the way I asked was subtle yet her answer may have been simply her going along with the humour.

Either way since then ive been a little not down but not as excited and we havent messaged for ages. I do want her, I do like her alot

On Tinder, a female that matched with me many weeks ago if not months and with whom I had some messages got back in touch today. We chatted so much that I got her number and we continued on whatsapp.

She did say she didnt want to get intimate with me during our chat yet the chemistry and sexual open chat is there so maybe she has changed her mind.

I said yesterday that I didnt get an erection at the strip club, but today whilst talking to tinder girl - yes we had a phone call chat for around 5-10mins, signal was terrible so we had to then cut the call - I got an erection and was aroused, so phew my tool works again haha.

I also just checked the swinging dating site and a couple have messaged me. Seems clear its a man that wrote to me, and the profile could be fake but its something to add.

I got on with what I wanted to do today but ive also wasted alot of time eating and watching tv shows.

I want to lose weight, i want a girlfriend, someone like pots girl.

Im hoping DMSI will help with this.

I spoke to my friend from lastnight and besides happily chatting about our day out, he also said to me to focus on losing weight to get girls. He said I need to get that started and not being lazy about it and to do what I can. He said maybe potsgirl may notice me more if I was slimmer which im sure is true but wont DMSI help.... DMSI come on man help a dude out!! lol

I have nothing more to add. Once I finish listening ill go to sleep.

I have 7 days to:

1) finish backing up my phone and laptop to clear space.

2) Do a study skills course I paid for otherwise I wont do it and I wont know if theres anything left to learn.

3) I must plan and organise my diet

4) I must plan and organise and start studying for final exams this summer.

No Fap: 43days

Desire to watch porn or go on porn sites: reduced considerably.

Sunday 8th April 2018 - (44-2.5A) - 2nd cycle, 5th Day
Time: 6.46pm
NOT listened to loop yet.

Slept at 4am after listening to loop, woke at 4pm, just had shower, finished and here to update journal.

Drank 1.5litre water before shower.

I think I had a dream, it was a dream where I was afraid of being alone and not in love or not in a loving relationship or not with a girl (whichever take your pick).

Point is during the dream it was a worry and upon waking I realised it must have been a dream. I cant be sure since I did wake once in the morning and fell asleep but im no no im sure it was a dream.

Im assuming the oneitis I have on potsgirl coupled with a fun night out and also the concern about my weight/looks/image has all played a part with this dream. Hope its a good sign.

will come on later to update.

Sunday 8th April 2018 - (44-2.5A) - 2nd cycle, 5th Day
Time: 8.21pm
Listening to loop now.

Ate breakfast which was more of a junkfood meal.

Listening to loop earlier than normal to get it out the way.

Messaging with snapchat girl. Do like her too but besides nice friendly banter where she may name drop her bf in relation to something were chatting about theres not much else happening.

Tindergirl messaged me with a smile and ive replied in the same manner. Shes now asked how I am but ive turned phone to flight mode to listen to sub and ill reply later.

No fap: 44days

Nothing else to report, nothing else noticed so far.

Monday 9th April 2018 - (45-2.6A) - 2nd cycle, 6th Day
Time: 1.49pm
NOT Listening to loop yet.

So what happened huh?

well a few things to note:

1) Tindergirl - chatting got less cos I have seen her pics on facebook without her knowledge and shes worth a fuck but not much else.

2)Snapchat Girl - says I say better things to her than her bf. Shes still seeing me as a friend even though shes naive and has said that shes def willing to go on holiday with me etc.

3) Potsgirl - this is the big one. Last I heard from her was thursday. Friday I was out with my friend and then I think I didnt hear from her until Saturday morning. The chat was left in her court to get back to me regarding a song and a discussion we were having about a song.

Anyway the point is that she of her own self and accord got in touch with me, apologised that it was a delayed/late reply and then asked me what I mean about this song I was referring to.

I was on the phone to another friend, so i asked her if we could talk (as I prefer to talk and make it more real than just message with her) and she said sure.

What took place is a 2hour chat. During the chat, she went out of her apartment to go to a local shop to grab some chocolates as she had a craving, and during that whole time she was on the phone with me, even when paying she was talking to me.

The conversation went well and I made her laugh many many many times during it all and I have tried to build comfort with her which I believe has worked too.

I think I was talking 60% of the time, mayeb a little more or less I cant say but I know that im automatically in the friend zone since she dated my friend, however our chats are more cooler now, I mean I never spoke to her on the phone until now (this being twice as you know if you follow my journal).

I spoke to my male buddy (the one I went to the strip club with) and he said sure I have to lose weight thats a given but now I just have to meet her outside, not at my apartment or hers yet and go someplace for a meal and a chilled out time.

Ive no real idea what to do to be honest. I however know we get on so well or so it seems to me.

Any thoughts and advice would be welcomed.

I really hope that DMSI is helping me somehow, I just dont know how if it is.

I am fixated about my weight though and know I have to sort this out. i woke at 10am today and since have been drinking water and doing things on and off so some procrastination and some not.

I went to the porn site, no reason to really and I sent some introductory hello messages on the swingers dating site. Im sure this comes from fear of some kind but unsure what. Maybe fear its not real and shes not into me which would be hurtful of cos.

Anyway she said she would get back to me later today after listening to the song. The song is pointless its just a hook for her to get back in touch with me.

After the chat she was falling sleepy so we ended the call.

No Fap: 45 days

extra: I did have a scary type of dream. Not nightmarish but more sad events that took place. I recall this probably because I woke during it but yeah it wasnt a nice dream and dont want to share too much about it.

extra: I wanna add that with Version/track A there isnt any tiredness, sleepiness or issue when i listen to A.

Sometimes I listen and just feel restless to finish it but I dont at times, most of the times even notice the trickling stream, I just sometimes zone back into the sound but mostly im not aware of the trickling stream.

is this good? thanks

advice:

So potsgirl and I are getting into a kind of challenge where im betting here random stuff and shes like she will win cos she hates losing.

So I said we need to have a real bet with a real wager and forfeit.

I was thinking something like have a bet as to who can eat the most pizza slices or something like that.

Question is what should the forfeit be? Personally I wanted it to be that if she loses she has to kiss me.... but my friend (strip club buddy lol) he said that could be sleazy.

so any ideas?

(04-09-2018, 04:23 AM)Jake2015 Wrote: [ -> ]extra: I wanna add that with Version/track A there isnt any tiredness, sleepiness or issue when i listen to A.

Sometimes I listen and just feel restless to finish it but I dont at times, most of the times even notice the trickling stream, I just sometimes zone back into the sound but mostly im not aware of the trickling stream.

is this good? thanks

Thanks for this info.. Yesterday I was motivated and energetic as fuck.. . Today I am a lifeless zombie

Update 2

Monday 9th April 2018 - (45-2.6A) - 2nd cycle, 6th Day
Time: 8.50pm
Listening to loop now as I type.

Please read update 1 above, as I still seek and need your advice regarding potsgirl.

So whats new?

1) Tindergirl has been messaging me pretty mum non-stop so yeah shes definately either wanting to fuck me or shes just wanting to chat....either way its nice cos since im not bothered about her either way I have a idgf attitude to her.

2) Potsgirl I think woke up late, because her whatsapp didnt show any life until 6pm and she did go to sleep around 4am because I was still awake too. anyway she messaged me in regards to the song and commented on how it was funny. I asked her if she could talk but she said she was a little busy so weve been messaging back and forth ever since.

Its hard to tell now if shes being polite or if shes into me. I mean she replies and we get on but is she replying cos she is being polite or is she replying cos she thinks were JUST good friends or more?

Im trying to get to know her more so im asking her what her fav perfume is and other such stuff.

So any advice please?

thanks

ps:

3) a girl is chatting to me alot too on swingerchat site. shes too far away but im enjoying it. Im getting hard either cos of her or cos of tinder girl so Im relieved my tool works ok.

No Fap: 45days

extra: while im listening to the loop im backing up my phones memory (lost of pics and videos etc) and I came across a pic of me, and I look terrible. Im not handsome at all :/ and this thought and feeling isnt leaving me and this is especially while im listening to DMSI 3.2 A right now via headphones

Tuesday 10th April 2018 - (46-2.7A) - 2nd cycle, 7th Day
Time: 9.18am
NOT Listening to loop yet.

Woke at 6.30am - had set lots of alarms.

Happy that i woke early, just ate breakfast and will be off out to run some errands.

Tindergirl is messaging alot. She has way too much time on her hands. Shes fuckable, 34 year old MILF but thats it but she is a little wacky in the head lol

Potsgirl, no message now, last was from me which was a hahaha to her hahaha. I accidentally video called her at 7am from my whatsapp but hungup immediately. Shell see a misscall from me whenever she does but im not too bothered, because I can simply bullshit outta it.

I dont know however what to do now with her. I have asked you all to read my posts, all of them from yesterday and give me some advice. So please do.

thanks

update 2:

Tindergirl: Still messaging alot

Potsgirl: She did message me and ask me if I called, and I said yeah was a mistake. We laughed it off and continued to have our usual jovial banter, then she asked me about ticket prices to a comedy act thats happening in May. I said ill find out and let her know.

My friend told me to give it a couple of hours before I message her, basically to not seem too keen.

Im confused by that because if i dont show im keen some other guy may get in there but I waited a few hours and then messaged her.

During our chat, again me cracking jokes, she then called me "mate"

This could be her way to say im a mate/friendzoned or thats just something she says but either way I wasnt too impressed.

The conversation has died again, no idea what to do.

I feel that besides not fapping nothing else is happening

im exhausted, waking up at 6am is causing me to be super sleepy right now.

update 3:

So my buddy said dont worry about the 'mate' word. He said it seems clear she likes you as a friend anyway cos you were are her ex bf and so im already a friend and he agreed that she loves my personality so all I have to do now is lose weight!

he said to me to just get on the exercise stationary bike now for 10mins, but unless I get my task out of the way that im doing (backing up laptop) then ill feel overwhelmed to do everything else.

any advice from you all is welcome provided you read all posts on this page first, thanks

update 4:

Listening to loop. - tomorrow is my 1 day break.

6 days since I started drinking water. I dont touch it otherwise but ive set a goal to drink 4L a day during these easter breaks from uni. Today I have so far dran 3.8L (time: 5.51pm).
Its my 2nd consecutive day of drinking 4L so excellent.

46 days of No Fap.

Im back on the swinging/dating site and im back to checking pornchat site incase pornchat girl replies.

Im bored of tindergirl.
I have no news from snapchat girl - who sees me as a friend.
I have no extra news from potsgirl - im keeping it quiet for now to not seem too keen as my friend said.

My friend also said lose weight - he said I have the personality, girls love that but what i dont have is the looks due to the weight. Im thinning on top, doesnt thin well either as in not symmetrical or decent but I cant change that.

I dont get tired listening to track A whereas I was feeling drowsy or tired from Track B.

I asked for advice in regards to pots girl, so please read and give it if you can. thanks