Day 16 - (2.1 - means 2nd loop cycle and 1st loop/day) - Sunday 11th March 2018
Time: 1.44pm
Not listened to the loop as yet. Normal listening time is 9pm and I want to change and bring this to around 8pm and earlier slowly so will try and listen today on or before 9pm if possible. (admittedly ive been listening past 9pm though lol)
Woke suddenly around 11am or 12pm.
Woke before that for a bathroom break but the point is that I was again tired.
I have had some things to deal with so will eat breakfast after typing this update and go shower and try to be productive today.
Nothing major to report except that I was dreaming and now forgotten what the dream was about. I think the dream though not sexual may have had a healing purpose but unsure now. All I do remember is that I thought pornchat girl had replied which so far she hasnt as she hasnt got back onto the site.
Nothing else to report unfortunately.
Day 16 - (2.1) - update 2
Time: 9.28pm
Not listened to loop yet.
Feeling major major tension/struggle/restlessness due to simply sitting down to work.
Im not even studying what I should, its watching youtube videos on how to study better and this is causing me major angst.
I need to shower too as well as listen to the loop and feeling kinda lost.
Got a match on tinder, were messaging but shes now on phone so will see.
Nothing else to report.
Dude, Stop searching on video on how u study better. Its only gonna cause u tension.
Believe me its better that u stop being hard on urself.
Don't make study a chore instead make it something fun. Like if u study for 10 min or 20 min and then after that watch some video or listen to music.
Before studying try visualizing how good u r gonna feel when u top the class and when that good feel takes over then try studying for 20 min and give urself and break and reward.
Just divide 20 min in 3 - 4 parts in 24 hours and study whatever u feel like.. U need to form a habit that's all and once that habit is formed u will be able to study any boring subject.
Don't watch the video.. Instead study whatever u like ask urself what u will like u study.. and go with it.
(03-11-2018, 01:06 PM)Zane Wrote: [ -> ]Dude, Stop searching on video on how u study better. Its only gonna cause u tension.
Believe me its better that u stop being hard on urself.
Don't make study a chore instead make it something fun. Like if u study for 10 min or 20 min and then after that watch some video or listen to music.
Before studying try visualizing how good u r gonna feel when u top the class and when that good feel takes over then try studying for 20 min and give urself and break and reward.
Just divide 20 min in 3 - 4 parts in 24 hours and study whatever u feel like.. U need to form a habit that's all and once that habit is formed u will be able to study any boring subject.
Don't watch the video.. Instead study whatever u like ask urself what u will like u study.. and go with it.
thanks alot bro, appreciate it and will try this. I think and not sure why but theres alot of fear and confusion around this and ive no idea why.
Day 16 (2.1) - update 3
Time 1.34am
Listening to loop.
Nothing to report except that I was horny and yet havent and didnt fap.
Ive asked shannon if me fapping will derail the sub at all incase I do finally think what the hell.
After my late night/midnight shower I had a thought/a reminder that the time that I started to increase in weight, suddenly and quickly was when I broke up with a gf. I went and started a relationship with another that was my rebound and soon after that got into another relationship as another rebound. I realise that therefore there must be alot of negative thoughts and emotions within me that perhaps are the reason for my fears and my weight gain and so Im hoping these get cleared and healed with Track A.
The only other thing is that ive become more unproductive than productive and im seeming to have oneitis for that pornchat girl :/
Beyond that ive been reading alot of posts where people are giving their pov on DMSI and suggesting how guys need to make the first move or series of moves once a female gives IOIs.
I have both read it from Shannon in a post as well as on the DMSI sales page that that isnt the design goal at all. The goal is for women to come and want to fuck u and to instigate the whole thing and push you into a fuck fest! I wish guys would stop putting their own spin on what DMSI is supposed to do or not do. lol
Information:
Shannon has replied to me and so fapping should be avoided as thats the scripting of DMSI and it has a purpose in being there so guess no fun for me for as long as I can hold off.
I have to admit I have been imagining fapping, or calling an escort over to fuck simply to get over my horniness but I havent done either and im not going to.
Day 17 - (2.2) - Monday 12th March 2018
Time: 11.35pm
Servers were down but were back and running!
I listened to the loop for today around 6pm
After this listen i was exhausted and still exhausted and didnt expect this at all so going to bed soon.
Fightgirl: been on phone again for 2+hrs. Shes dropped invites to go get some donuts as well as to come over to mine as we used to do to hang out and eat delivered food etc.
Her friend (a mutual friend now) then got messaging me and we got on the phone for an hr or so too and shes said we should hang soon too.
Im grateful and glad that people want to hang out with me as there are other friends out there, male buddies that constanly say we should hang out cos im a funny chilled out guy and its all great but im eager for DMSI to bring to me the girls I find super hot.
No fapping now for 17days. I still go to the porn site more to see if pornchat girl has replied and she hasnt logged on at all yet for last 2 days and while on there ill favourite porn. I also do still check out local escorts and its all so tempting but im not fapping or actively watching porn or anything.
So is no fap all im gnna get?
addition info:
I had to log back in because I totally forgot about this, but I had a dream lastnight and in the dream Shannon told me the ARSB for me is 1:1. I think that means listen for 1 day and 1 day break. No idea if this is a message from my subconscious to me but ive asked shannon and will await his reply.
I managed to be the first posted in his new #3 Journal - yes im happy with myself lol
Jake,Your life is not gonna change in 17 days. Its gonna take time.
A plant cant become a tree in a Month.....Takes Years
A baby isnt born in a day..Takes 9 month
Everything takes time buddy..
You say nofap is all u r gonna get? What if u didnt even got that?
Seriously, you are chatting with girls and boys and girls want to hang out with u...Dont u think thats a change?
The change has to start somewhere buddy..Small changes can lead to big changes.
What if nofap thingy also didnt worked for u? Wont u be disappointed?
I can bet you that u try reading ur old Journals and u will see that u have changed..
The most interesting thing about change is that sometimes it happens so smoothly that we dont even realize it.
One thing u must learn is to be patient. Believe that things will change. Cause when u start believing that then u will love life even more and things will happen smoothly
(03-12-2018, 02:41 PM)Zane Wrote: [ -> ]Jake,Your life is not gonna change in 17 days. Its gonna take time.
A plant cant become a tree in a Month.....Takes Years
A baby isnt born in a day..Takes 9 month
Everything takes time buddy..
You say nofap is all u r gonna get? What if u didnt even got that?
Seriously, you are chatting with girls and boys and girls want to hang out with u...Dont u think thats a change?
The change has to start somewhere buddy..Small changes can lead to big changes.
What if nofap thingy also didnt worked for u? Wont u be disappointed?
I can bet you that u try reading ur old Journals and u will see that u have changed..
The most interesting thing about change is that sometimes it happens so smoothly that we dont even realize it.
One thing u must learn is to be patient. Believe that things will change. Cause when u start believing that then u will love life even more and things will happen smoothly
thanks alot bro I appreciate the reminder. It seems I always fall back to being inpatient or doubtful, a skeptic and need reminding.
When it comes to the women side that hasnt changed, its always been this way, being chatty and friendly and having their company though all these girls being friendly all at once is whats changed I think for sure.
You're right, ive got some kind of result from this sub, that being the no fapping so its working and finally ive stopped stonewalling. I should no matter how small be happy about this because yeah if I had stonewalled again i would be so very disappointed for sure!!!
Im still feeling tired as if ive had so much stress that im trying to get sleep and recover, and im unsure if this is DMSI or uni/a bitch of a teacher in particular whose clutches ive managed to escape from now lol
Day 18 - (2.3) - Tuesday 13th March.
Time: 1.05pm
Not listened to loop yet. I have a class at 3, so will listen once I am back home.
I am very tired. I slept around 2am and woke around 12. I did wake at 1 point at 7.45am but I stayed in bed.
I woke feeling very tired. Yesterday after listening to the loop I was more tired than I usually feel.
Still no fapping though.
Day 18 - (2.3) - update 2
Time: 12.16am on Wednesday 13th March
Listening to the loop now as I type.
I am listening late as uni finished late and I ate super late too.
I am already getting tired and so its a confirmation that DMSI is the cause and thus I am at some level trying to resist the sub. That proves to me that:
1) The subs work as I am trying to resist.
2) If DMSI is as powerful as I hope then there is no more resisting left....it will smash through 1 way or another!!!
I am also now sure that I am NOT stonewalling but executing as I have not fapped for 18days.
This is joyous and a moment to celebrate people.
My run of stonewalling is at an end.... now things can only get better...can only get....better.....
I know there is a long way to go. Not fapping is a huge start.
I have yet to stop going to porn sites, I have yet to stop chasing women and I have as yet to improve upon myself in so many ways for DMSI to execute.
However can you all offer me some suggestions now or later.
Quote:From Shannon:
A is a gentle approach. B is a forced march. They will both achieve the goal if you execute, but not in the same way or at the same speed.
What you run when A comes out is up to you.
I wonder since track A will be more gentle and perhaps a slower route and B will be more direct and rough and harsher whether to stay on B or move to A.
What do you all think and why?
That's up to you, only you can decide. If B is too harsh then you could try A when it comes out to see.
(03-13-2018, 03:03 PM)Benjamin Wrote: [ -> ]That's up to you, only you can decide. If B is too harsh then you could try A when it comes out to see.
Thanks bro, thats the thing I cant honestly tell that B is harsh. All I get from listening to it is tiredness/sleepiness which is fine as I tend to listen and sleep.
Im not sure if the daily tiredness ive felt is due to B either.
What is 'harsh' therefore please so I have some idea what to look for?
Day 19 - (2.4 loop) - Wednesday 14th March 2018
Time: 6.35pm
Just got back from uni, will eat then start the loop at some point tonight.
TODAY I WAS EXHAUSTED!!!!
I couldnt sleep last night until around 5am and woke many times and missed my 8am class and rushed to get in for my 11.15am class for which I was 30mins late.
All day I was tired.
I also saw today that the group of girls in the class I thought were giving me some attention (in the TID/pre DMSI days) today werent and its easy to think maybe lack of sleep played a role in this but no idea.
EDIT: I SHOULD ADD THAT THE GIRLS WERENT GIVING ME IOIS BUT THE OPPOSITE. IT WAS AS IF THEY DIDNT EVEN NOTICE ME TODAY AND IF THEY DID THEN THEY WERE QUICK TO AVOID NOTICING ME AGAIN. IT WAS SUCH A STARK DIFFERENCE TO BEFORE.
I am also alot more insecure about my hair loss and about my weight today.
19 days of no fap. Not feeling anything else to report.