Subliminal Talk

(11-03-2014, 07:06 AM)athanas Wrote: [ -> ]I admire your resolution, I have a hard time going sober myself. It's just too tempting if I know my game could be 10 times better just with a bit of alc. Well at last the first half of the night, the second half the right calibration of tension just gets harder and harder making me **** up much of what I built up with my awesome care free state in the beginning.

Nowadays I usually feel like I need 1 or 2 beers/drinks to counter the performance anxiety I create for myself during the initial part of the night, e.g. I need to find something to do, somewhere to be, approach girls, have fun, etc. I can get the sexual vibe going sober and dancing sober isn't too much of an issue anymore either. So once I get "settled in", I can switch to coke or water. Then again if I can't find anything to do, or anyone to approach, I'll start getting a bit anxious so I might have a drink again. But really its probably a much better option to just feel the anxiety fully, then go home at the end of the night and pstec that shit away. I only drink alcohol to be free of those anxieties, so better to actually just accept & deal with them. As you said, the alc is very tempting every time, but if I really think about it... its a weekly activity that I have been doing and will continue to do for a long time.. so which would I rather do: cover the anxiety up with alc, or clear it away with pstec? In 3, 6 or 12 months, how would my results differ? lol. I'll still probably have that 1st drink as that's just often so enjoyable.

I'm down to 1 or 2 cups of coffee most days, sometimes none. I'll have a cup just before I go out and then 1-3 big cokes at the club. Its all fine if I go out just once a week, but the alc + caffeine + lost sleep makes it much harder to go out the following day (and enjoy it). I hate forcing myself to go out if I'm not feeling like having fun. On the other hand I know I'm just afraid that it'll go badly, but on the other hand it just sounds needy to have to go out if that's not what I really want to do.
--------------

Stage 3, Day 9. I went out with girl #2 yesterday. I tried to get her to come to my place directly, but she wasn't having any of that and seemed like she might start playing hard to get by the way she was texting me that day. But it was all good when I finally saw her, lots of fun actually. She's is really freaking sweet & gorgeous, imo. We went for a drink and talked. She was very responsive, asking me questions, contributing, good eye contact, sly smiles, at one point she was biting her lower lip and such. I stopped speaking mid-sentence once or twice b/c there was so much hinting in the eye contact somehow. I was in my affectionate touching mode, mostly thighs under the table, and she did it back to me a few times. I then took us to another bar for a beer. After that we just left and walked directly to my place. Neither of us suggested or mentioned it, we just both knew we were going there. Then inside I actually tried to make some tea first, but she was coming on so strong I had to throw her on the bed, lol. We did not have sex yet, because she didn't want to, and I honestly don't mind the wait. She seemed very relieved that I was so fine with not rushing the sex and just enjoying the fun, joking about it. I want to have that relaxed & trusting human connection, not shields-up regret-later achievement sex. And there was so much kissing, touching, stroking and painfully suggestive finger sucking anyways that.. its all good :)

One thing I found interesting was that she seems quite a bit younger than me, but she has never asked me about my age at point. And she's definitely not too shy or anything, so its a deliberate decision on her part. Anyway, I hadn't been on a date for a long time and its a lot of fun to go with someone who really wants it go well, instead of holding back and/or trying to enforce their selector frame on me.

Please update your picture to Mufasa

The moment you opened your door to your place and closed it, you should have pinned her to the wall, thrust, kiss her neck till the back of her ears, and moved towards your sofa without stopping the kisses and etc, and you would have fucked her that night. Although good to see that you didn't force her when she wasn't as horny anymore and more in the "Thinking" about what she feels is right at that moment. Keep it going, you're getting some good results looks like!

Geodude - Ha, maybe I will.. but I like the boyish feel for now, maybe after I've graduated from SM3
http://images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/3...0-2813.jpg

lokko - That was actually almost exactly what I did, just 10 to 15 minutes later. I was going to going to heat up some tea, but she was pressing into me so I stopped that, pinned her against the kitchen counter, smelling and kissing her neck, wall, bed, ... she was on my bed, topless, while I was massaging her down there with my hand on her panties. I was moving my hand sideways under the panties when she stopped me and I felt she didn't want to go further that night. Playing continued for a good time afterwards anyway, and it was a fun night.
--------------------------------

Stage 3, Day 10. There are 2 girls who I've really been wanting to talk to for the last several months. I see them from time to time when I'm on break from work, or going to work. They're always either in the middle of a group of ~6 women or otherwise in "difficult" spots, and I'm a bit careful at work. Anyway, this morning I found I'd stepped out of the morning bus, all sleepy and out of it, and one of those girls was walking right behind me. So I stopped her, made her take her headphones on and tried to say something coherent.. It was reaaally awkward and I was stammering and whatnot, but it actually went well! Wow. She was saying she's sorry she's a bit out of it now b/c she had to hurry (I was in a hurry myself). I expected her to not open up to me for some reason, but it was all eyes open, facing me and "yeah, so my number is...", sounding like she was into it. I asked her out later, but she sent me this long list of stuff she needs to do this weekend and suggested we go out next week instead. Ok, we'll see how it goes.

The girl from the day before (girl #2) came for a 2nd date today. Absolutely no resistance, she basically came over to have sex. Overall the date was more fun the first time though, because it just had more energy to it somehow. My performance wasn't too short, but it was a bit too limp. I guess I was holding onto some slight anxiety about the 1st time being too quick before it actually happened, and also I've had a wet half-boner for a few days straight thinking about her so I guess its just been a bit too much. She had to go before round 2, but yeah.

Right now I'm leaning towards WM2 after SM3. It was definitely the right choice to do SM first, and I love it, but WM is probably more my style in the long-term. I mean, I can't meet, fall in love with and start having sex with 2 girls per week, every week... I'd have to drop them at the same rate and that's not what I want long-term. I guess I'd like to date 2-3 quality women + flirt around and WM is probably a better fit for that (after this SM sexual enlightenment). Hate to lose OGSF and OE though :/

Stage 3, Day 17. Not much has been happening, except that I've been busy with various stuff. Its possible that stamina results are starting to show, though I'll hold off from proclaiming it just yet. At the same time there was also a period where my sex drive was suddenly quite low, whereas just before it had been very high. And it was not due to pstec, btw, didn't use it then. I noticed I haven't really felt anxious in a while and its not a feeling than comes up too much anymore. Sometimes there's this cautious feeling in meetings at work or similar situations, but nothing above a 3 or 4. Walking in the streets feels good, like a boss ;) Eye contact I'd say is pretty good. I've mostly seen women in the gym, but that gym is very small so I'd usually have to go talk to them while there are 5 people working out within a few meters, all of who I see there at least every other time I go. And no music.

What Shannon said to Sarge is turning out to be interesting. I posted elsewhere that I'm worried about if there's a "moral problem" for waiting until about 1-3 hookups before coming out with the non-exclusivity talk. I've been feeling some other things as well, so today I did PNs: "I have nothing to offer (to women)" and "I don't deserve sex with beautiful women", then followed up with PPs: "I have a lot to offer" and "I deserve sex with beautiful women". I was getting bored too, but I noticed that during that last one my mind wandered to an image of me doing AM6 again and going through all kinds of difficulties and issues it brought up, and I think it was implied that going through that kind of hard training would finally make me worthy, i.e. deserve sex w. b. w. Of course that not right, so this follows:

I wouldn't say that I've been putting of my responsibility to the subliminals. I know they're inanimate, and I often think of them as listening to instructions, like I'm at school and I'm learning something useful. But what is true is that there has definitely appeared this new concept of my subconscious, who is separate from me. Whereas before I'd say I took responsibility for my action and went out 2-5 times a week for some 1.5 years every week, now I've been trying to take responsibility by examining and trying to perfect this subconscious (beliefs, etc), and then its HIS responsibility to throw me into situations and make shit happen for me.

Its pretty clear that results wise, I was talking to a shit ton more people a year ago, and I was only having way more sex. When I started with this belief-centered thing, I drifted away from taking direct action. Which was good, because I was doing all I could, I didn't really know what I wanted and I didn't have the self-validation and sense of direction that I have now. Once I started to see that I'm doing a lot of stuff that I don't really want to be doing just to get "practice", or laid without a decent connection, it had the effect of pushing me away from that kind of action. But now it seems I'm, in fact, not taking direct responsibility of my results anymore. If I wanted to have 4 girlfriends again, I don't see any reason why I couldn't make it happen now as I did then. I don't want those kind of results, but I'm also not making the effort to get what I DO want now. Basically I'm waiting for it to become effortless, which is NOT a proactive way of doing things.

My in-person interactions are going really well atm, but with stuff like texting, I somehow don't assume responsibility anymore. I feel like its a waste of time and fake and that I'm such a catch now anyway that I should just be able to say "let's go out tonight at eight, meet me here" to a new girl out of the blue after a week of silence. And when it doesn't work out, I'll blame her. But really its still my responsibility to at least first get a feel of where she's at and then see if I can quickly pace and lead her back to a more suitable state. I don't even know any NLP tricks, but you know, go with her.

Well, I'll try to keep my mind on this for a while. I'll do a PP with "I take full responsibility of my results" for 30 days straight starting today and I'll try to start seeing things more through that perspective. Feels very empowering, but what pops up instantly is "Its too much work. If I'd take full responsibility, I'd have to work 36 hours a day, I'd break everything I've built just searching for alternatives and I'd burn out in a week". But yeah, we'll see. And maybe another run of AM6 could be a good choice after SM3, even if it is in the summer ;) Just because I should already be able to have a good social life if I assumed full responsibility, and AM should support that attitude best.

I noticed during AM5 my approaching went way down because I was waiting for AM5 to make it easier for me rather than take action which was what I used to do. I think the best results of subs will happen when you are taking massive action towards your goal as well as playing the programming your subconscious.

I would it see more as take action but more to find what is blocking me. Like Shannon said to take responsibility for your own mind (subconscious behavior). For example when you see a girl and you have some anxiety I'll try to find what is blocking me. The first step is to find the problem then you can clear it. The question would be: how could I improve my behavior around girls. What past even I need to clear and replace to get better emotionally. And then when you have done that you take action and you test if your anxiety/fear has been removed.

What I have done until now is to forget about AM6 and let him do his things and I don't want know about it. It's there I have been stupid instead I should search what is preventing me from being better.

(11-13-2014, 02:13 PM)guilotine Wrote: [ -> ]I noticed during AM5 my approaching went way down because I was waiting for AM5 to make it easier for me rather than take action which was what I used to do. I think the best results of subs will happen when you are taking massive action towards your goal as well as playing the programming your subconscious.

Agreed. It'd probably be for the best if I could stop monitoring my results with the sub, because if I'm monitoring what I'm doing, then I'm not actually doing it, I'm waiting for something to happen and then trying to grade it.

And if I am my subconscious, then me selecting to not act could in a way mean that I'm giving my sc. an instruction to not act, too. And in reverse, if I am choosing to take responsibility and action, then that choice could be effective on all levels.

(11-13-2014, 11:30 PM)maniac360 Wrote: [ -> ]I would it see more as take action but more to find what is blocking me. Like Shannon said to take responsibility for your own mind (subconscious behavior). For example when you see a girl and you have some anxiety I'll try to find what is blocking me. The first step is to find the problem then you can clear it. The question would be: how could I improve my behavior around girls. What past even I need to clear and replace to get better emotionally. And then when you have done that you take action and you test if your anxiety/fear has been removed.

^^I have been doing this. But the thing is, in that example what you (eventually) wanted was to approach the girl and you didn't take the responsibility for making that happen. You could have, but you delegated the responsibility to you "mind (subconscious behavior)". It seems like what I was reasoning: my responsibility is to clear any blocks I can find, manage beliefs and so, and its my subconscious mind's responsibility to actually take action. Doesn't that seem like a cop out if out look at it closely? Maybe you had anxiety and maybe it wouldn't have gone perfectly, but who is the one who could've at least tried something? For me at least, all those anxieties are already much lower than they we're before, so how low do they have to be before I can be bothered to actually do something.. I mean, it might work but if applied to all areas of my life, that's just a slow approach.

Clearing blocks is great and I fully intend to be doing that full-Geodude style But I'll try to take the responsibility for non-perfect action in the moment when the situation presents itself, and then work on the blocks after to make it easier the next time for me to take action.

(11-13-2014, 12:28 PM)LionKing Wrote: [ -> ]Stage 3, Day 17. Not much has been happening, except that I've been busy with various stuff. Its possible that stamina results are starting to show, though I'll hold off from proclaiming it just yet. At the same time there was also a period where my sex drive was suddenly quite low, whereas just before it had been very high. And it was not due to pstec, btw, didn't use it then. I noticed I haven't really felt anxious in a while and its not a feeling than comes up too much anymore. Sometimes there's this cautious feeling in meetings at work or similar situations, but nothing above a 3 or 4. Walking in the streets feels good, like a boss Eye contact I'd say is pretty good. I've mostly seen women in the gym, but that gym is very small so I'd usually have to go talk to them while there are 5 people working out within a few meters, all of who I see there at least every other time I go. And no music.

What Shannon said to Sarge is turning out to be interesting. I posted elsewhere that I'm worried about if there's a "moral problem" for waiting until about 1-3 hookups before coming out with the non-exclusivity talk. I've been feeling some other things as well, so today I did PNs: "I have nothing to offer (to women)" and "I don't deserve sex with beautiful women", then followed up with PPs: "I have a lot to offer" and "I deserve sex with beautiful women". I was getting bored too, but I noticed that during that last one my mind wandered to an image of me doing AM6 again and going through all kinds of difficulties and issues it brought up, and I think it was implied that going through that kind of hard training would finally make me worthy, i.e. deserve sex w. b. w. Of course that not right, so this follows:

I wouldn't say that I've been putting of my responsibility to the subliminals. I know they're inanimate, and I often think of them as listening to instructions, like I'm at school and I'm learning something useful. But what is true is that there has definitely appeared this new concept of my subconscious, who is separate from me. Whereas before I'd say I took responsibility for my action and went out 2-5 times a week for some 1.5 years every week, now I've been trying to take responsibility by examining and trying to perfect this subconscious (beliefs, etc), and then its HIS responsibility to throw me into situations and make shit happen for me.

Its pretty clear that results wise, I was talking to a shit ton more people a year ago, and I was only having way more sex. When I started with this belief-centered thing, I drifted away from taking direct action. Which was good, because I was doing all I could, I didn't really know what I wanted and I didn't have the self-validation and sense of direction that I have now. Once I started to see that I'm doing a lot of stuff that I don't really want to be doing just to get "practice", or laid without a decent connection, it had the effect of pushing me away from that kind of action. But now it seems I'm, in fact, not taking direct responsibility of my results anymore. If I wanted to have 4 girlfriends again, I don't see any reason why I couldn't make it happen now as I did then. I don't want those kind of results, but I'm also not making the effort to get what I DO want now. Basically I'm waiting for it to become effortless, which is NOT a proactive way of doing things.

My in-person interactions are going really well atm, but with stuff like texting, I somehow don't assume responsibility anymore. I feel like its a waste of time and fake and that I'm such a catch now anyway that I should just be able to say "let's go out tonight at eight, meet me here" to a new girl out of the blue after a week of silence. And when it doesn't work out, I'll blame her. But really its still my responsibility to at least first get a feel of where she's at and then see if I can quickly pace and lead her back to a more suitable state. I don't even know any NLP tricks, but you know, go with her.

Well, I'll try to keep my mind on this for a while. I'll do a PP with "I take full responsibility of my results" for 30 days straight starting today and I'll try to start seeing things more through that perspective. Feels very empowering, but what pops up instantly is "Its too much work. If I'd take full responsibility, I'd have to work 36 hours a day, I'd break everything I've built just searching for alternatives and I'd burn out in a week". But yeah, we'll see. And maybe another run of AM6 could be a good choice after SM3, even if it is in the summer Just because I should already be able to have a good social life if I assumed full responsibility, and AM should support that attitude best.

My eye contact is so powerful , that I am afraid to look at people because I am afraid I am going to see through them and sort of dismantle them. You should only approach girls if your heart is in it . In other words approach knowing your INTENT. You Don't need any ladies validation look at you ,you did AM and now your doing SM how many people would do that and sacrifice being tired all the time not many. The sub is like pages of a book you read it internalize it and then you take action. As far as your negative beliefs I came across the one that I don't deserve to have sex with beautiful women , but how can that be true when I stand for truth , love and etc.. in the end looks can be deceiving beautiful women are very insecure and they know why.

(11-14-2014, 02:54 AM)Jackpot_100 Wrote: [ -> ]My eye contact is so powerful , that I am afraid to look at people because I am afraid I am going to see through them and sort of dismantle them. You should only approach girls if your heart is in it . In other words approach knowing your INTENT. You Don't need any ladies validation look at you ,you did AM and now your doing SM how many people would do that and sacrifice being tired all the time not many.

I approach very few girls, but when I do its always a girl that really turns me on and I always approach with intent and suggestive eye contact. My approaches go really well 90% of the time, the problem is just that I'm doing so very few of them. I may not even see such an interesting girl in many days, but I should be making more of an effort to go out consistently so I COULD see them, and I should make sure I actually do something when I see one. And not just go home and click track it going badly or something, or wait for SM3 to progress and for them to come to me. If I don't try, I will not succeed. If I fail, I'll probably not care, and then I'll have something to click track.

(11-14-2014, 02:54 AM)Jackpot_100 Wrote: [ -> ]The sub is like pages of a book you read it internalize it and then you take action. As far as your negative beliefs I came across the one that I don't deserve to have sex with beautiful women , but how can that be true when I stand for truth , love and etc.. in the end looks can be deceiving beautiful women are very insecure and they know why.

Yeah, I wrote a one-page list of why that belief is not true just prior to doing the pstec negative track. Sex isn't about deserving anything, its about 2 consenting people having fun and making each other feel good. I know I have a lot to offer sexually, as well as in regards of being open, making her feel good about herself, etc. There just was, and maybe still is, something I can't place that's still bothering me inside. I guess the "beautiful" part isn't really about her looks, its about that she has a lot of choice b/c of her beauty. So I guess its really about comparing myself to the (imagined) other guys who'd be going for these very beautiful women.

I just realized last night... I've know my "main girl" for a year now, and I don't think she's ever acted badly in any way towards me. No testing or negativity or anything like that, its always positive and non-needy. There was quite a bit of resistance and testing at the very beginning, but nothing after we properly got going. And she's very extroverted, so I don't think she's holding it in. I'll have to plan a small reward for her soon ;)

Stage 3, Day 21. Weekend was a bit special so its hard to compare progress. I've sort of lost that uber-sexy feeling I had at the start of stage 3 and even before in st. 2 - its been tuned down for maybe 2 weeks now. Now I have to dig down for it, whereas before it was on all the time. Maybe I'm just tired, though.

Anyway, I haven't noticed anything new, except there was a situation where I was out with a small group and this one woman would NOT let me go.. she's not my type, is happily married with children and overall it'd be a really bad idea for us to hookup, but she started leaning in my ear and asking me if we'd go get a drink, if we should move on to another place.. many times. "I'm going to ask you one more time: do you want to go somewhere still?" I said no several times and she got angry and left the bar for a while after that last one, lol. Eventually she pleaded so hard I agreed to go for one more drink and luckily managed to dissipate any tension by our choices of topics. It actually turned out as a nice heartfelt chat on both sides, for which I received very nice "thank you"s. And on the other night I went out, some reactions were good and some bad, but what is certain is that I definitely wouldn't have been as confident a year ago. It was a really busy night and I got rejected straight out of the bat several times, but wasn't phased at all. The interactions that actually got going went pretty well, but all ended for different reasons, mostly b/c the girls were taken and b/c it was so crowded people had virtually zero attention span. Not my type of place in that regard. Fun night overall though.

I finally remembered to check out Good looking loser and he was completely different than I though he'd be. Good stuff. Similar to RSDJulien in that he can expand your "dark side" a bit. Something like Masculine Intent, but.. well, angrier. I'll have to read more when I have some time. I'll have to switch up my gym routine soon too, so I'll see what he has to say about it.

With regards to pstec, I'll do some on the side. I'll either go through any negatively-charged memories I can find or clear something that just happened. Otherwise I'll try to take action/responsibility for it when I can. The fun side of taking responsibility is that you're ONLY responsible to yourself, so it kind of helps with stuff like screening harder for girls that are actually down for something happening. Meaning that my own permission to do so is enough, because I have a responsibility to myself to make something happen, and to not waste my time on girl who are not open to anything. Atm there's a kind of lingering hopelessness wrt to meeting interesting women, partly b/c I'm meeting so few and still screening them out pretty easily atm.

I tapped on some memories yesterday and did 2 accelerators before going to bed... felt nothing special, but it was completely impossible to get up after 8 hours of sleep, it was just NOT gonna happen. lol

Peace.

Stage 3, Day 24. So, change of tactics again. I have seen some results from SM3, but they have been very inconsistent and it even seems like some results only lasted for a short while until they we're gone from where they came. Or maybe its a naturalizer thing, idk. Anyway, for various reasons I'll drop the tapping and increase my listening hours. I'm hoping to see some effect purely from the sub. I've been doing around 12-14 h/day, but I'll increase it to around 14-21 depending on what's practical for any given day and if I get too tired.

Another thing is that Geodude mentioned NG which I have meddled with a bit in the past. I watched a few videos yesterday and its actually even better than I remembered. I think its a good simulation for the open/appreciative feeling I've been using with women lately anyway. Gets you out of your head and into an observant, meditative state. So I'll replace any late-night tv watching and such I might've been doing with NG, while SM3 plays in the background.

I'll paste here what I wrote elsewhere on NG. Its of course all IMO, its just to tell you why I choose to do some of that again.

(11-20-2014, 03:17 AM)LionKing Wrote: [ -> ]NG is looking at feminine women on video, so its a simulation of spending time one-on-one with such a woman. I think the point that NG would make you more feminine is thus the same as saying spending time with feminine women will make you feminine. Well it might, if you start acting like the women you're with. The way I'm seeing it, it should be fine with SM as long as you don't "join in" on their fun, you just look at them like they're flirting with you in a girly way, while you remain in the masculine. If you start singing along with the songs, you might be in the Danger Zone ;) But there's no subliminal messages, beats or anything special.

Anyway, thanks Geodude for reminding me. I actually did some NG yesterday and turns out I get the exact same feeling looking at those girls that I get with real-life girls when its going great. I was trying to describe it in my journal with something like "I like them and I let it show", but its basically this mix of "you're so ***** cute/adorable", mixed with a deep sexy feeling and maybe looking at them up/down once in a while that I also get with NG.

Lots of subs + some NG + going out, seems like a simple enough setup to start seeing more consistent external results, if such are to come. I'm also reading the How to become an alpha male book again (3rd or 4th time).