Subliminal Talk

Day 95 / 180 OFF

Woke up this morning from some quite disturbing dreams, of which I remember little. All I know is that multiple fears collided and were coming from all angles at me. I was very fearful in this dream. It was kind of a fear training for my subconscious.
So I decided to play a loop this morning to wash over last night's dreams.

Day 96 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid.

For a lot of time, I had the impression that the reason I became so shy, fearful and suppressed my masculine core, was because I was bullied and had a hard time in high school. But yesterday I actually realized / remember that I was like that well even in my childhood years, since I was little. In the first couple of years of my life, I was raised by my grandmother, and she instilled a lot of fears in me. She had good intentions, but her over-protective, fearful and precautious nature have not done me good and stunted my development. She was always very self-aware of potential dangers in the environments(dangerous dogs, burning myself, falling off the bed, being in conflict with other boys...) so much that she molded my personality a lot.
As a boy / man in this life, you have to develop courage, boldness, to explore this world and expand your knowledge / experiences. This is what I've been lacking.

Day 97 / 180 ON

3 loops Hybrid

Increasing libido.
Yesterday I had moments where I felt genuinely happy. 
Woke up at 5am with a racing heart after 5 hours of sleeping and another disturbing fearful dream. It seems like OF is trying to get me to man up and face / process my fears in my dreams, yet I'm still scared and encounter a lot of dangers and fears in my dreams, and I just freeze...

Day 98 / 180 ON

3 loops Hybrid 

Had a 23-year old girl come over last night. I was super confident, calm, assertive, dominant with her and she couldn't help it but be attracted to me. We had great sex.
Very minimal  anxiety, which quickly went away. The goal is to completely get rid of any form of anxiety. I am confident that by the end of OFv3 and a run of either LTU6 or AM6, that will be accomplished. 

I went to bed at 2AM and had 3 loops in my playlist. Woke up with a dull headache, so I wonder if it's time to dial it down to 2 loops / day. @Shannon Any thoughts on why exposure needs may vary like this?
I am currently following a 3 days ON - 2 days OFF cycle.

Day 99 / 180 OFF

Been killing it in the gym lately.
Confidence and Non-neediness in my dating life are at high levels.
Tempted to run AM6 as my next sub.

Day 100 / 180 ON

3 loops Hybrid

Confidence and cockiness at high levels.
3 loops back to back in a playlist when going to sleep is now my preferred listening pattern. Haven't had any dreams in the last couple of nights.

Day 101 / 180 ON

3 loops Hybrid

Life is going well now. I definitely feel an identity shift that OFv3 has caused.
One of the girls I am seeing came over last night. She gave me sh*t tests at the beginning, but I handled it very well and remained dominant & held my frame. And she quickly turned sweet and submissive towards me, she couldn’t help it. She also complimented me, saying I am very good looking and how much she loves my eyes.
I now strongly feel I should run AM6 after I’m done with OFv3.

Day 102 / 180 ON

3 loops Hybrid

Day 103 / 180 OFF

Quiet couple of days.

Day 104 / 180 OFF

Craving exposure time. Will go back to 4 loops starting tonight.

Day 105 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 4-5/15 Volume

My birthday is coming up in a week. Feeling optimistic about my life.
It was a restless first half of the night, playing the sub prevented me for falling asleep deeply. There was 2 fears that came up in my mind in the form of visual scenarios / imagination. One being the fear and anxiety of / around pitbulls. The other one, can't remember which one it was, but it was an attempt on my physical health / integrity.
I seem to have a lot in my subconscious surrounding the possibility of getting hurt, being injured, chased. Hope OFv3 will deal with it.
The more I run this sub, the more I realize how vast the scope of this sub is. So many fears to untangle. Not sure 6 months will be enough.

Day 106 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 4-5/15 Volume

OFv3 is slowly turning me into what I hope AM6 would turn me into. It is turning me into a non-needy, self-validating man. I am much more self assured and confident in my worth / value as a man, it is making me realise my strong points and raise my standards with regard to women.

My anxiety is a 3/10, goal is to lower it to 1/10. 
I also desire to become fully at ease with myself and with the world and unafraid  to express my authenticity. 
Being more entitled and unafraid to approach women I like is another big goal of mine.

Day 107 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 4-5/15 Volume

Woke up in a good mood, have the whole week free, so I will reflect a lot these days on my financial future.
Confidence going at high levels.
My relationship with porn has improved & I don't stress about it that much. Porn use has reduced. I will admit I do masturbate a few times / week, but without the use of porn. I am much more drawn to chatting and meeting up women in real life.

Day 108 / 180 OFF

Bouts of depression, apathy and impulsive drive to watch porn today. It seems to come in cycles. Definitely OFv3 stirring something.
It’s my OFF day, but I am going to play a loop tonight.