Subliminal Talk

Day 131 / 180 OFF

Depressed today for literally no reason.
Boredom has set in about the sub.

Day 132 / 180 OFF

2nd OFF day this cycle. I now have less urgency to run the sub as much as possible or to skip OFF days. I stick with the schedule.

Day 133 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 5/15 volume

Feeling better today.

Day 134 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid

I'm flowing today. All the weights of life don't pressure me.
Had an amazing last night with a girl, she has madly fallen for me. She has only been seeing me, but I haven't promised her exclusivity (yet).  At some point, while in bed, she told me: "I just wish you were mine and only mine"
Her feminine presence was so soothing. I was super leading and dominant with her, she loved it. This is now my reality, my way of being.

Day 135 / 180 ON & Day 136 / 180 OFF

4 loops Hybrid(on Day 135)

OFv3 continues to make me a Self-validating individual, I simply now lack the need to show off, to receive validation or compliments on social media. My mind is focused on more important things.
Extreme levels of non-neediness also. I will not chase anyone at this point.
I've become much less impressed or intimidated by a woman's beauty. I am conscious of the fact that no woman is irreplaceable. There are an abundance of beautiful women. So her beauty has no power over me. I now look for much more than that, for traits such as femininity, kindness, good style...

Thoughts revolve around getting money, also considering a potential LTR / relationship with a girl...

Day 137 / 180 OFF

Quiet day.
Taking more interest in Crypto. Used to be a gambling addict.

Day 138 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 5/15 volume

Another cycle. Realizing how much I've been playing it safe in my financial life.

Day 139 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 5/15 volume

Something strange happened for the last 2 nights. I am not entirely sure I actually listened to the required loops overnight.
I use earphones and the foobar2000 app where I have my playlist of 4 loops. Last night I do remember pressing play right when I went to bed, but when I wake up, the playlist slider was stuck at minute 15 of first loop. Either I somehow stopped the track in my sleep unknowingly, or I did play the whole 4 loops and it started over again.
And the night before this, I woke up with the playlist finished at the end, but I don't remember actually pressing play, only that I put my earphones on.
Perhaps a form of sabotage / resistance or my subconscious telling me I need more loops.

More inclined to take calculated financial risks.This might be OFv3 influence.

Day 140 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 5/15 volume

Had a myriad of dream sequences last night. All revolving around the theme of fear: feeling the fear, facing it, overcoming it, getting out of fearful / dangerous situations alone...
Woke up in the morning feeling bold, optimistic.

Day 141 / 180 OFF

Less than 40 days left on OFv3. I will reach 180 days in mid-December. As previously said, I am tempted to run ME as my next sub. Even though I am aware that LTU6 or E5 would be excellent choices for me.

Day 142 / 180 OFF

Had some kind of a sex dream last night - it was quite pleasant, I was kissing and having foreplay with a girl. We don't know each other in real life, but I do recognize her from social media.
Otherwise, I've been mellow, apathetic, depressed lately.

Day 143 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 4-5/15 volume

Quiet day.
Having aspirations about getting a car in the near future, becoming more financially powerful

Day 144 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 4-5/15 volume at midnight + X loops during the day

Had trouble falling asleep last night. Today I've felt depressed again, a recurring theme of my OFv3 run. Feels like I'm not executing the sub, which is such a shame, it makes me angry.
Going all out on 7-8 loops starting today, after seeing @THolt journal. If this doesn't work, I will switch to Masked or US for the remainder of my scheduled days.

I wanted to run ME next, but I'm not yet in my strongest mental state. In which case, I'll have to run either E5 or LTU6.

(11-08-2021, 07:12 AM)GreekGod22 Wrote: [ -> ]Day 144 / 180 ON

4 loops Hybrid at 4-5/15 volume at midnight + X loops during the day

Had trouble falling asleep last night. Today I've felt depressed again, a recurring theme of my OFv3 run. Feels like I'm not executing the sub, which is such a shame, it makes me angry.
Going all out on 7-8 loops starting today, after seeing @THolt journal. If this doesn't work, I will switch to Masked or US for the remainder of my scheduled days.

I wanted to run ME next, but I'm not yet in my strongest mental state. In which case, I'll have to run either E5 or LTU6.

I've had a few days of depression/blues here & there.  The longest instance was recent, just this last week.  It eventually went away.  Full disclosure, I ran DRS solo for a few loops, and that actually helped me feel a lot better.  Makes me wonder if what I'm feeling is always me, or someone else projecting at me...