(12-07-2016, 01:20 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (12-07-2016, 01:04 PM)Mr. Anderson Wrote: [ -> ] (12-07-2016, 12:03 PM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]That being said, I trust Shannon implicitly, and the way I see it, the subliminal instructions are his Voice.
I remember he said once he is using computer voices.
Not sure RT is being literal in saying that...
Yeah, maybe...
(12-07-2016, 01:24 PM)Mr. Anderson Wrote: [ -> ] (12-07-2016, 01:20 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (12-07-2016, 01:04 PM)Mr. Anderson Wrote: [ -> ] (12-07-2016, 12:03 PM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]That being said, I trust Shannon implicitly, and the way I see it, the subliminal instructions are his Voice.
I remember he said once he is using computer voices.
Not sure RT is being literal in saying that...
Yeah, maybe...
Was literally not being literal.
I feel like the OE is creating healing/clearing scenarios that are bringing up situations causing me to increase my expectations and then be disappointed, specifically to clear whatever is holding me back from achieving the goals of DMSI.
It's "little stuff," that I've found impacts me emotionally, and it's necessary to get rid of it all. I hope as it comes up it's cleared out completely, totally, and forever.
What's coming up are thought patterns I've seen before - again, again, & again (in some form or another since frickin' puberty!). They haven't been prevalent recently, and now, here they are. Get rid of it all - weaknesses that don't benefit anyone in any way, needy BS thoughts. They aren't good if you're single, in a relationship, or married.
Healing is definitely still the focus.
Same loops, volume.
Made it to the gym. Lifted with my jacked buddy again. I was benching, and he asked to spot. I said I didn't need it. He said, "What, you trust me, don't you?" I said, "Yes." Then he looked relieved and said, "Oh good, because your trust in me is really important to me."
Hmm, odd thing to say, no?
At the dip station two women who circuit train according to their PT's instructions came over and asked to work in. One of them is a chick in my Top 3. I've caught her checking out my crotch in prior DMSI versions, and as of today, I hadn't seen her in a few weeks. I noticed that as we interacted, the other girl (who's much more attractive than I previously thought) suddenly had very erect nipples, and was shooting shy glances my way.
Then my friend, may as well call him B, offered his hand to them and introduced himself. They did back, and I figured next it was my turn. Yet, the ladies wouldn't look at me. So I thought, fuck it, I'm not going to waste my time on them. I told B I'd be right back, and went to get a drink. Then I returned and basically ignored the women. Whatever that was all about.
Later B told me he was about to introduce me when I walked away. I just said that when they wouldn't look at me, I didn't have time for that and decided to walk away. I said I decided to remain more of a mystery.
When I picked up my son from the gym daycare, one of the prettier gals actually talked to me about him for a few minutes. She's never done that before. In fact, until now, she's barely acknowledged my existence.
EDIT: Forgot to mention a dream where my dad was being critical of me, and after asking him repeatedly to stop, he kept at it and I choked him out with my forearm. It's strange, because my dad and I have a really decent relationship now, but there must be some unresolved issues there.
(12-08-2016, 10:34 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]Same loops, volume.
Made it to the gym. Lifted with my jacked buddy again. I was benching, and he asked to spot. I said I didn't need it. He said, "What, you trust me, don't you?" I said, "Yes." Then he looked relieved and said, "Oh good, because your trust in me is really important to me."
Hmm, odd thing to say, no?
Yeah, very odd. If I was in your shoes I would have made a huge forum post about it.
(12-08-2016, 10:34 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]At the dip station two women who circuit train according to their PT's instructions came over and asked to work in. One of them is a chick in my Top 3. I've caught her checking out my crotch in prior DMSI versions, and as of today, I hadn't seen her in a few weeks. I noticed that as we interacted, the other girl (who's much more attractive than I previously thought) suddenly had very erect nipples, and was shooting shy glances my way.
Then my friend, may as well call him B, offered his hand to them and introduced himself. They did back, and I figured next it was my turn. Yet, the ladies wouldn't look at me. So I thought, **** it, I'm not going to waste my time on them. I told B I'd be right back, and went to get a drink. Then I returned and basically ignored the women. Whatever that was all about.
Later B told me he was about to introduce me when I walked away. I just said that when they wouldn't look at me, I didn't have time for that and decided to walk away. I said I decided to remain more of a mystery.
I recognize this kind of behaviour in myself sometimes. Its a deep seated fear. Can't put my finger on it exactly, but it has definitely something to do with not wanting to feel rejected, fear of abandonment, pride, not wanting to feel hurt etc. There's no sane reason to walk away like that. And there's no reason to feel bad about yourself if your friend is drawing the attention or introducing himself. But for some reason I too sometimes feel bad if I don't get all the attention or if someone else in my vicinity is receiving it. It's an insane behavior if you analyze it..
Will be interested to see if DMSI clears this.
I'm definitely all for clearing up any insanity. There's more where that came from!
Man, 12 hours post-loops fucking sucks for me. Every damn night I get anxious and emotional, thinking shit thoughts.
It's kicking you butt, eh?
(12-08-2016, 04:47 PM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]Man, 12 hours post-loops ***** sucks for me. Every damn night I get anxious and emotional, thinking shit thoughts.
I'm getting that too. I feel like I'm living in solitary confinement.
(12-08-2016, 05:01 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]It's kicking you butt, eh?
Yup. Even had a 2-hour nap beforehand thinking that'd help, and maybe it did. It's worse when I'm alone with my thoughts, and today I've been mostly home alone (no other adults, anyway).
But, I've experienced the breakthroughs before, so I know what's coming will be completely worth it.
Wife worked a 24-hour shift last night, so I opted to listen on my Bose speaker.
Before the loops started, I probably got a good 5.5 hours of sleep. My sleep was LITTERED with dreams, which I experienced and remembered VIVIDLY at the time, but now can't remember. I only vaguely remember one of them had my brother in it. Strange that he's been in at least two dreams since starting this version - I don't really know why.
Then the hybrid TS started - and startled me. It was SO LOUD! I turned it down a few notches. I slept, then woke up thinking, "Geez! It's SO LOUD!" Turned it down again. I think, all-said-and-done, I turned it down to half the volume it started off at. It was so annoying! I don't have this issue wearing earphones.
I woke up to my alarm, which never happens. I would have happily slept for another few hours, even though I had already slept at least 9 hours (which is unheard of for me). Even as I sit here typing, I can already tell I will be napping this afternoon.
Still no extra hunger to report. I wonder if it's because my home has crystals, magnets, and orgonite all over the place. I also use a far-infrared sauna every other day, which possibly could be used as an energy source as well.
My libido is raging, though I have little-to-no desire to take care of it myself or watch pornography.
I have no desire to run the DMSI-B-track. I don't see the point. I'm going to ride DMSI-A all the way to the next release. I gotta get rid of every last bit of crud. Every-last-bit! I can't imagine how well the rest of the script will execute when that happens.
(12-09-2016, 08:57 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]I have no desire to run the DMSI-B-track. I don't see the point. I'm going to ride DMSI-A all the way to the next release. I gotta get rid of every last bit of crud. Every-last-bit! I can't imagine how well the rest of the script will execute when that happens.
Same here. The prescribed 3 months at the very least. The healing and clearing alone is worth the price of admission.
Listening to today's loops was so annoying for me. I was wide awake reading a book, but I felt like I should toss my headphones in the bin. I knew it was resistance and let the sub do it's thing.
(12-09-2016, 08:57 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]Wife worked a 24-hour shift last night, so I opted to listen on my Bose speaker.
Uh?! 24 hours is three days of work in most European countries. Even those in the health industry in the UK do 12 hours max per day, and then do 6 hours the next day or have the day off completely. 24 hours looks insane to me. Is this normal in USA?