Subliminal Talk

Three years after losing everything, I'm about to take it ALL BACK. Without apology. Without remorse. It is my birthright. It's what HE left us.

All joking aside, I'm going hyper-metaphysical and philosophical with this journal. For those of you that don't know, I just got a well paying job and I'm back out in the world again for the first time in three years. That means I can FINALLY use DMSI without having to worry about ridiculous logistics and the such.

v3.1 will likely be my last DMSI for awhile before switching to MLS and MHS for martial arts training purposes. So... let's make it a blast and explore what it truly means to be an ascended alpha male in today's society.

DMSI 3.1 will be the greatest invention since the microwave. Shannon has mastered the art of using solar energy thereby turning users into human batteries i am so amazed.

I suspect that Shannon is the son of Nikoli Tessler or him reborn into a new body.

And I'm doing the hyping. lol

(02-28-2017, 06:47 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]And I'm doing the hyping. lol

All aboard the hype train ! :angel:

V3.1 *might* be my last DMSI for a bit as well since I'm going to be going back to school shortly and I really want to give MLS 5.5G a shot especially if Shannon manages to crack the code and break my procrastination habits. Of course I say "might be" because if V3.1 works well and is able to achieve its design goals on a consistent enough basis for me then, well...I might be tempted to *ahem* "test" it while visiting other campuses looking for graduate programs...for social networking purposes strictly of course.

Day 1:
Format: Masked

Went to see LOGAN at 10:00p last night. What an amazing, deeply emotional film. It's "No Country for X-Men" with awesome action sequences and some fine acting on Jackman and Stewart's part. For any "X-Men" fan, that final shot will definitely cause some misty eyes.

Anyway, got home and downloaded v3.1 masked. I lasted about two minutes before the sub totally knocked me the f*ck out. I didn't stand a chance. Woke up this morning with a SPLITTING headache and intense hunger. I'm also beyond exhausted. This sub is much more taxing than MHS and I miss the latter already. With MHS, I would wake up, hop out of bed within seconds and be ready for the day. Today, it took around 45 minutes for me to drag myself out of bed. That's partially because of the headache, though.

Anyway, I downed two Goody Powders and a BIG ASS CHOCOLATE BROWNIE just in case it was a sourcing issue. The brownie alleviated the headache a little bit. It's not so intense and "clenching" around the back of my skull.

Emotionally, I'm oscillating between extreme highs and lows. One moment, I feel like I'm approaching a breakthrough and I'm perceiving flashes of greatness. Then, I'll plunge into an equally fleeting moment of sorrow.

It's also really hard for me to think, concentrate or construct sentences (a common resistance symptom for me) and I want nothing more right now than to just go back to sleep.

I hate to be "that guy," and so early on in the game, but I can't deal with these headaches and the exhaustion. I know my brain is probably looking for a loophole to quit the sub, but that doesn't change the fact that my new job requires intense concentration and focus for long periods of time and I can't do that while suffering from debilitating headaches and sleepiness. Hopefully, this isn't something that will happen often and I'll tear through whatever resistance is causing it.

Glad to hear Logan was awesome, can't wait to see it. I better see it alone if it's that emotional. I don't cry at funerals, but certain movies get to me, as I go into pure empathy.

I wonder if your headaches, etc. is turbulence. So far, I've had none-of-the-above - the sub didn't knock me out, no headache, woke feeling pretty great for having had a night of weird dreams and less sleep than normal.

I wonder how your experience will compare with others who have ran P4/P5 subs back-to-back.

(03-03-2017, 08:51 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]Glad to hear Logan was awesome, can't wait to see it. I better see it alone if it's that emotional. I don't cry at funerals, but certain movies get to me, as I go into pure empathy.

I wonder if your headaches, etc. is turbulence. So far, I've had none-of-the-above - the sub didn't knock me out, no headache, woke feeling pretty great for having had a night of weird dreams and less sleep than normal.

I wonder how your experience will compare with others who have ran P4/P5 subs back-to-back.

I actually suspected that the headache and/or the emotional rollercoaster is turbulence. I don't think the headache is -- I resist DMSI a lot harder than most people realize. v3 was a very taxing sub on both my mind and body and I was constantly battling these headaches.

The highs and lows, though? Yeah... this isn't common. It feels like MHS and DMSI is fighting for dominance. It's weird, I didn't experience this going from DMSI to MHS. But vice versa is a different thing.

As for LOGAN -- if you're familiar with the X-Men mythos, it'll hit even harder. Just the bleakness of the situation they're in and how Xavier's dream obviously never came to fruition. The movie never really goes into detail about what happened. They just drop a lot of subtle clues here and there, opting to focus instead on the regrets of the superhero formerly known as Wolverine.

But I'll stop, let you enjoy it fresh. Great movie, I kinda wanna see it again.

Getting a lot of "wtf is this dude" looks...

Me too man. It's awesome.

Long report coming tomorrow as I've been traveling from VA to NC to GA and back for the past few days but I'm experiencing some very massive shifts in my thought patterns and habits in just three days.

For example, I suddenly became overwhelmed at the outpouring of warmth and kindness I received from my ex and her new husband this weekend. It was nice feeling part of a family again and I indulged in that moment. I've spent the last decade just pushing people away, never letting them get close... and there was something very real about just being able to let go and have fun. Feels like I released something.

Then, I was in the gas station, eyeballing this very pretty blonde. Well... pretty to me -- she looked kinda weird / hipsterish, but was still my type. And all of a sudden, I broke out in song. This song to be exact: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqtmXnQZ6Qk (which I used to sing to my daughter over the phone when I was in CA and she was in NC).

When I realized what I was doing, the blonde spun around, started grinning and asked why I stopped. Said she loved that song.

I would've gotten her number, but... I was in South Carolina at the time, soooo...

Anyway -- that weird resistance passed, and it's been pure bliss since then. Also, got the strong urge to switch from masked to hybrid. Doing that now.

If I remember correctly you were singing in a grocery store last time you broke into song. A girl noticed you then too. Time to change careers?

Day 3:
Format: Hybrid

Last night, I had this dream that I was railing the F*CK out of my aunt (on my father's side, by marriage -- but still). Like, I was really giving it to her. In my head, I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I just didn't give a flying f*ck. Well, actually, I gave a lot of flying f*cks. To her. Then we cuddled in bed like a couple and I woke up like wtf is this sh*t.

v3.1 is a really weird sub. I can't quite put my finger on what's happening, but it's really like my reality is being twisted, warped and bent into something new. Internally, I don't know who the f*ck I am even more. Even the way I write and sign my signature has changed. It's freaking crazy.

Then, the wild ass manifestations. I had little to no OkCupid and Tinder manifestations over the past few weeks. Three days of v3? Suddenly, the floodpipes have opened. Weird thing is, they're all from far off places. F*cking Boston. Canada. The UK. All messaging and just saying "hi." I'm not even sure how they even found my profile, as both OkC and Tinder generally limit your searches to your local area. Get this SH*T: I matched with this pretty Latina, who we'll call Izzy, almost two weeks ago, but never messaged her because I was too busy training. Well, I was on the road all weekend. Drove about 400 miles away from where I live. Guess who then decides to message me. That's right -- Izzy. She told me she was interested in MMA, so we're supposed to be meeting up at a park on Saturday so I can go over some basic moves with her. Free first date that lets me show off my skills? Count me in.

I was like, wtf? Did the long range sniper kick in after I left? This weirdness keeps happening incessantly. I'll be out and about and will just sense that someone's staring at me. And it's a really weird look, like... "who is this ALIEN?" In the women's case, I can tell there's some slight attraction there, but it's different from anything I've ever experienced, and I can't put my finger on it. It's like a stare and a slight smile. Not really animalistic lust (I think), but almost like they want to have my children.

I've also been using some mental alchemy to check my subconscious and I keep sensing this feeling that all my limits are being dissolved. If I keep running v3.1, I will have NO limits soon.

The sub is smooth. Very smooth. It reminds me of v2.4.

(03-06-2017, 08:51 AM)chaosvrgn Wrote: [ -> ]Same. Getting very surreal and just plain weird dreams. One involving having to survive some kind of crazy ass flood and being voting in as the new "Noah."

And then... there was last night's dream...

(03-06-2017, 09:01 AM)chaosvrgn Wrote: [ -> ]Day 3-6:

Last night, I had this dream that I was railing the F*CK out of my aunt (on my father's side, by marriage -- but still). Like, I was really giving it to her. In my head, I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I just didn't give a flying f*ck. Well, actually, I gave a lot of flying f*cks. To her. Then we cuddled in bed like a couple and I woke up like wtf is this sh*t.

v3 is a really weird sub. I can't quite put my finger on what's happening, but it's really like my reality is being twisted, warped and bent into something new. Internally, I don't know who the f*ck I am even more. Even the way I write and sign my signature has changed. It's freaking crazy.

Yeah it is. I feel like whatever is happening is beyond my control, but somehow I'm not resisting it. I'm just like "well, I guess this is happening"

Kind of makes me think of Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men and how he always just goes with the flow.

(03-06-2017, 09:01 AM)chaosvrgn Wrote: [ -> ]Then, the wild ass manifestations. I had little to no OkCupid and Tinder manifestations over the past few weeks. Three days of v3? Suddenly, the floodpipes have opened. Weird thing is, they're all from far off places. F*cking Boston. Canada. The UK. All messaging and just saying "hi." I'm not even sure how they even found my profile, as both OkC and Tinder generally limit your searches to your local area. Get this SH*T: I matched with this pretty Latina, who we'll call Izzy, almost two weeks ago, but never messaged her because I was too busy training. Well, I was on the road all weekend. Drove about 400 miles away from where I live. Guess who then decides to message me. That's right -- Izzy. She told me she was interested in MMA, so we're supposed to be meeting up at a park on Saturday so I can go over some basic moves with her. Free first date that lets me show off my skills? Count me in.

I was like, wtf? Did the long range sniper kick in after I left? This weirdness keeps happening incessantly. I'll be out and about and will just sense that someone's staring at me. And it's a really weird look, like... "who is this ALIEN?" In the women's case, I can tell there's some slight attraction there, but it's different from anything I've ever experienced, and I can't put my finger on it. It's like a stare and a slight smile. Not really animalistic lust (I think), but almost like they want to have my children.

I've also been using some mental alchemy to check my subconscious and I keep sensing this feeling that all my limits are being dissolved. If I keep running v3, I will have NO limits soon.

The sub is smooth. Very smooth. It reminds me of v2.4.

Awesome that you got some OKC manifestations tho. Mine has been the opposite, but something tells me it's cause reality is shifting. There's always that bit of "lag" when switching realities, amiright?