12-25-2014, 02:07 PM
AM6 STAGE 1 - Day 5
Xmas is cool. The AM6 subs are screwing up my sleep, I wake up after a few hours thinking about the changes I must make. Then I wake up mid-day, next year I plan to be walking at 6am and hopefully jogging before I start the day, I only hope this sub stabilizes before then or I might have to change the listening plan.
Family Manipulation
Besides that my brother has always had power over me, I cultural obey your elder’s thing. This Xmas he tried sending me around but I didn’t comply he shouted and all but I was cool about it, before I would react like a dear in head lights.
My mum also sent my sister to get something and I was standing close to the door. I thought that was weird been the youngest and all and been the closest, to the door. For some reason I don’t like been told what to do anymore.
Why try to improve people?
Tried speaking to my brother about ADHD and ADD since I done the research and saw the professional about it, it seems everyone thinks it’s just an excuse and anyone can claim to have it. Its been known to run thru families at different intensities. Don’t know why I have this urge to “help” people. Even got on someone else’s trend trying to get him off porn coz it almost utterly destroyed my life. I don’t know why am the only one in my family that’s trying to better myself, and they not been helpful, always teasing me about the self-improvement stuff I do. I would have spent my life struggling with ADHD and Dyslexia because they think I choose to be lazy even tho I have potential. Cant wait to break free from they influence and be independent of thought, emotions, validation etc. Otherwise all’s well cool holiday and I still cant wait to start my meds and start my new life next year.
Xmas is cool. The AM6 subs are screwing up my sleep, I wake up after a few hours thinking about the changes I must make. Then I wake up mid-day, next year I plan to be walking at 6am and hopefully jogging before I start the day, I only hope this sub stabilizes before then or I might have to change the listening plan.
Family Manipulation
Besides that my brother has always had power over me, I cultural obey your elder’s thing. This Xmas he tried sending me around but I didn’t comply he shouted and all but I was cool about it, before I would react like a dear in head lights.
My mum also sent my sister to get something and I was standing close to the door. I thought that was weird been the youngest and all and been the closest, to the door. For some reason I don’t like been told what to do anymore.
Why try to improve people?
Tried speaking to my brother about ADHD and ADD since I done the research and saw the professional about it, it seems everyone thinks it’s just an excuse and anyone can claim to have it. Its been known to run thru families at different intensities. Don’t know why I have this urge to “help” people. Even got on someone else’s trend trying to get him off porn coz it almost utterly destroyed my life. I don’t know why am the only one in my family that’s trying to better myself, and they not been helpful, always teasing me about the self-improvement stuff I do. I would have spent my life struggling with ADHD and Dyslexia because they think I choose to be lazy even tho I have potential. Cant wait to break free from they influence and be independent of thought, emotions, validation etc. Otherwise all’s well cool holiday and I still cant wait to start my meds and start my new life next year.
If you can't manage the little you have now, who will trust you with more, if you can't control yourself long can you rule over others for? Its easier for a king to rule a kingdom than himself and who does want an empire? Being unconquerable lies with yourself!
