Apex-Predator Evolutionary Log - AM6 RE-RUN Stage 2 - Letting go

[Dee]

Before - http://subliminal-talk.com/Thread-Apex-P...5#pid44715

After

Alpha Male 5 Training Set Objectives Part Two

Objectives of AM5 and my position after I done it.

New inclusions for Version 5.0:

• Acceptance of, and feelings of deservedness of, being treated well, Deserving respect from others

I do feel I deserve respect, I don’t look the respectable type, I understand this and am working on this, at times I feel like have achieved more than other because of where I started from, having a learning disability in an information age isn’t easy. Well am trying to say I respect myself more and feel other should do the same.

• Self-love and liking yourself

As my self-respect grows so does myself love.

• Valuing yourself

I know my ideas are valuable as in my less confident days people stole them and used them to great benefit. So I know I will offer the world a lot in time.

• Extended ego balancing
No comment

• Strong, centered masculinity and masculine presence

I know feel more like a man, and I refer to men as men and boys as boys whereas before I didn’t clearly make the distinction.

• Destruction of negativity within you concerning yourself and others, and replacement with positivity

“I am self-critical and I project that on everyone and everything I do, if it’s not perfect it’s not good enough.”
That where I was before, now I rarely think bad thoughts and when I do it’s like its projections from the past or memories gather than me thinking them in the first person.

• Self-acceptance with continual striving to be better than you are

“I need to be a perfect being to accept myself no less no more.”
I understand that no one is perfect, everyone has they own insecurities, fears and demons in the closet. If ever the was a reason for living it would be striving to be better. I used to want to be “perfect” as a way of escaping been criticized, but now I want to be “perfect” because it’s possible

• Destruction of laziness and Motivation boost

Well I still am lazy to do physical tasks and I don’t do chores if I can get out of them, but I have been working 8 hours a day on my business. I remember stage 2 or 3 when I was feeling like giving up on life and now am feeling like taking on the world.

• Doing what needs to be done, because it needs to be done, and that is the way of the Alpha

In terms of chores I still shy away from that. But in my business I am now doing thinks that I was expecting to hire people to do but because there was no way from progressing without those things been done I fine my self-doing those task. From where I was last year in terms of my feelings of competency to where I am now. I feel like am been guided to all the life changing tools by the hand of destiny for a reason beyond my confidence level right now.

• Extroversion enhancement and training

Well am more talkative to people I general but I don’t have any overwhelming urge to go out and make new pals

• Self forgiveness

I have accepted that I done the best that I could at the times that I could, now that I am wiser I can do better. And the more I learn the better I can become, next year I will be better than I was last year, so I can’t beat myself up on unrealistic wishes.

• Social stability, skill and strength

I need practice in this field, I doubt I can sit at home and have a sub make me a master.

• Overcome abandonment issues,

I don’t know how these manifest to know how there have changed

• Success training

Didn’t know what this is, but I win like am wining and I am.

• Gratitude

“I was ungrateful for my life, and everything in it, although I am fortunate in many respects, I still prefer to look at people with more stuff and compare it to my own.”
I am grateful not all the time but still, it’s like no one deserves anything, it’s like we all given life and blessings. An artist once said he was self made even thought I understand the saying I can’t help but think his fans made him. So am big on gratitude coz no one owes anyone anything.

• Self trust

Am learning to do this, as my memory improves and my cognitive abilities so does my self-trust. I have noticed how ever that I most get things right the first time but doubt myself and pick something else, instance feedback as proved this to be the case.

• Self-image of man, instead of boy

Funny but the tone in my head has changed from the non-treating boy tone to one of more authority, this is improving but it’s hard to be the man when you living in your father house under his rules.

• Leadership training and development, Decisiveness training

Maybe this has improved but I tend to change my mind a lot and debate stuff to my self after making a decision, it has cost a lot of hours of productivity.

• Authenticity and congruency training

Ave always been about been the real deal. Some guys are cool with lying to get chicks, I feel like I can be what I want to be and feel bad about lying and am saying am a fake to myself. So this would be big although am not sure I will notice its effects.

• Destruction of jealousy and possessiveness, and replacement with self security, self reliance and self satisfaction

I used to feel bad and disappoint with myself when I saw other peoples success now am cool with it, I’ll be successful too so, well I already am just not in the way people can see and touch and am not bothered by this.

• Constant self growth and progress

I had this before and will always have it.