(11-28-2017, 09:22 PM)Determined Wrote: [ -> ]Lol, you're actually a twat. In no way was that an attack but somehow you've taken it as such
While K-Train is discouraging you, I'm commending you for having a desired outcome and going for it. There are numerous ways of getting to it, how you're going to do it is up to you.
Lol, my bad?
I do that a lot, I'm trying to fix it. But understand, when someone tells me I have an issue but offer no solution, it doesn't really come across as helpful.
I thought ktrain was quite insightful tbh.
Anyhow, thanks for the kudos.
I'm confused on this too Determined, how was I being discouraging to Sarge? I was reading what you were saying and trying to (but apparently failed to do since it may or may not be what you intended) communicate it to Sarge because he did not understand what you meant by "running back to that" .
@Sarge: My advice would feature possibly moving on depending on how things go and what type of relationship you specifically want from her.
I've always wanted a FWB situation with any woman I've been attracted to.
Not sure what that has to do with moving on, but like I said, it's not up for discussion.
If you're worried about oneitis or me not going after other women, don't. I approached a girl today as a matter of fact. Nothing became of it thought.
My point is, I'm not hung up on her, I just want to get with her. Big difference. Now, I've said this enough times. Either help me achieve MY goals, or leave me in peace. That goes for both of you. And everyone for that matter.
Ultimately it's my life. I have open arms for anyone who will help me achieve my goals, but not for people who try to get me to do what THEY want me to do.
I trust I've made myself clear.
If you don't agree with me irt my HD, I can always use help with my many other approaches or online endeavors.
(11-28-2017, 09:46 PM)K-Train Wrote: [ -> ]I'm confused on this too Determined, how was I being discouraging to Sarge? I was reading what you were saying and trying to (but apparently failed to do since it may or may not be what you intended) communicate it to Sarge because he did not understand what you meant by "running back to that" .
@Sarge: My advice would feature possibly moving on depending on how things go and what type of relationship you specifically want from her.
Initially I shared your same sentiment now, that Sarge should move on. It was only after this
"So I'm gonna do DMSI 3.0.1a for the rest of the week. That was the one my hairdresser responded best to, and I'll use Xist to hopefully reset her. Then, next week, I'm visiting a different city for a job offer. I may stay there for a long time, so we'll see how that goes. I'm hoping the sudden change will be anough to shake my HD into a "wanting" state. But this is mainly a hail mary."
That I see he's doubling down and going for it. I commend him on his tenacity.
(11-28-2017, 09:32 PM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ] (11-28-2017, 09:22 PM)Determined Wrote: [ -> ]Lol, you're actually a twat. In no way was that an attack but somehow you've taken it as such
While K-Train is discouraging you, I'm commending you for having a desired outcome and going for it. There are numerous ways of getting to it, how you're going to do it is up to you.
Lol, my bad?
I do that a lot, I'm trying to fix it. But understand, when someone tells me I have an issue but offer no solution, it doesn't really come across as helpful.
I thought ktrain was quite insightful tbh.
Anyhow, thanks for the kudos.
It's not my place to tell you what to do, you have to figure that out for yourself.
K-Train may or may not be aware of your other history with that girl such as you having already taken her out on a date and making out with her. Usually with women you have to strike while its hot. Very rarely if ever they give second chances. Though after seeing how much you desire her, that may change her mind.
Honestly in that paragraph I posted before about subtext, if it wasn't blindingly obvious to you what she was saying (women talk sub-textually while men talk overtly) she was basically telling you why she isn't interested in you and why she's interested in the fire man "he's done well for himself. He's a chief now, etc etc"
Combine that with the fact that she's full time employed, divorced with two children to feed. Having a fuck buddy is probably low on her list of wants and needs, lower than finding a stable guy who can support her.
(11-29-2017, 12:32 AM)Determined Wrote: [ -> ] (11-28-2017, 09:32 PM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ] (11-28-2017, 09:22 PM)Determined Wrote: [ -> ]Lol, you're actually a twat. In no way was that an attack but somehow you've taken it as such
While K-Train is discouraging you, I'm commending you for having a desired outcome and going for it. There are numerous ways of getting to it, how you're going to do it is up to you.
Lol, my bad?
I do that a lot, I'm trying to fix it. But understand, when someone tells me I have an issue but offer no solution, it doesn't really come across as helpful.
I thought ktrain was quite insightful tbh.
Anyhow, thanks for the kudos.
It's not my place to tell you what to do, you have to figure that out for yourself.
Which is what I'm doing...
(11-29-2017, 12:32 AM)Determined Wrote: [ -> ]K-Train may or may not be aware of your other history with that girl such as you having already taken her out on a date and making out with her. Usually with women you have to strike while its hot. Very rarely if ever they give second chances. Though after seeing how much you desire her, that may change her mind.
Honestly in that paragraph I posted before about subtext, if it wasn't blindingly obvious to you what she was saying (women talk sub-textually while men talk overtly) she was basically telling you why she isn't interested in you and why she's interested in the fire man "he's done well for himself. He's a chief now, etc etc"
Yeah that could be. I figured she was just trying to see if I'd get jealous. But I'll take your experience over mine in that regard.
EDIT: However, I thought that in order to be alpha you SHOULDN'T be a provider.
(11-29-2017, 12:32 AM)Determined Wrote: [ -> ]Combine that with the fact that she's full time employed, divorced with two children to feed. Having a **** buddy is probably low on her list of wants and needs, lower than finding a stable guy who can support her.
Yeah but I have no problem wit her finding a stable guy... while we are FB's on the side.
I don't get why that can't be a thing.
So, had an interview at a gym today. I won't mention the name for privacy reasons but it's a prominent one.
I don't feel like I nailed it, otherwise they would have hired me on the spot methinks.
I heard a few "good answer" and "I like that" but overall I feel like I'm just too green, especially when it comes to more social-dominant (as in, social intelligence is a major factor) jobs.
We'll see how it goes. They said they'd let me know by Friday (today's Wednesday). That's probably a bad sign.
Anyhow, just trying to be realistic. The upside is that I didn't over represent myself, stayed honest and kept my integrity.
There were 3 interviewers. 1 guy and 2 hot girls (one of them smoking hot, and when asking me a question she winked at me, but I think it was a wink that said: "come on, give us a better answer")
Still, maybe DMSI was affecting the girls. One can hope.
But anyhow, now I have to figure out what I'm going to do.
I have 2 other jobs I applied for pending. If I don't get either of them, I have to decide what I'm going to do because I'm running out of money.
Interestingly, that one I had in another city has presented me with blatant proof of my social issues. They require references... and I don't have any (I did manage to find 2 people, but it was tough). But it just goes to show you need EVERYTHING to succeed in life. Social skills, friends, integrity, honesty, skills, experience, and on and on.
I really think if Shannon focused on making subs that IMPROVED a user in these areas it'd be much better, both for the customer and for him.
Analogy-Time!
So, I like to believe that everything in life is connected and the Fibonacci sequence can be applied to everything as well, even patterns of behavior or what works and what doesn't.
So, if we assume that any potential friends or romantic interests are potential customers or employers, we have to conclude that they will only buy or hire based on what WE can give them.
If you go into an interview and misrepresent yourself, you may get the job, but you won't keep it. Same with everything.
So, tying this back to DMSI, even if we SEEM to be a ladies man, we'll soon be found out if we can't display our skills in that area.
At least, that's my current theory.
I don't know, it's all so complicated but basically I'd say if Shannon can develop subs to help us learn how to do/be what we need to do/be in all areas of life, that would be much more useful than having an aura that says we do.
But I could be wrong about everything. I know Shannon keeps his cards close to his chest, which is fine. I only say this because I think it may help, not to complain or criticize.
In other words, it's just my opinion.
Just some more brainstorming as to what DMSI and subs in general may benefit from.
I wonder if making subs where we are more "others focused" is actually a bad idea.
If you think about it, most people are selfish and will do whatever they can get away with. I wonder if being too "others focused" makes a person unrelatable at a very deep/core level. Even perhaps untrustworthy.
So DMSI notables:
- Went to Denny's with my mom. I got there first, they sat me down then left me alone for over 10 minutes. My mom came in and went to the bathroom and the waitress came over and I was like "I don't know if I want to stay because I've been waiting so long". She says "Sorry, well the new shift is on so that's why things are slow." and I'm thinking "You couldn't tell me that?"
Plus, this was the same girl who made me and my brother wait a few weeks ago so I wasn't buying it.
Anyhow, mom and I decided to leave and go to another location. In there we had a waiter who was from the previous location. We greete3d each other and he recognized me. I was like "Hey, I know you! How's it going? What are you doing here?" anyhow we chat for a bit, then he brings my mom and I coffee and from that point forward he rarely comes around and seems angry and distant suddenly. I'm thinking "WTF am I projecting to get people like this?!" So that was odd.
In the Denny's a toddler came over to the booth beside me and stared at me. Eventually her parents grabbed her. Then at the front while waiting to pay, a girl (16-18-ish) smiled at me. I smiled at her to but she was there with her dad or grandpa.
I dunno. Maybe I'm just getting paranoid, but seems crazy things are happening and I'm affecting people negatively.
Of course I'm smiling and more engaging than ever before.
EDIT: OR, I could be misinterpreting all this stuff like I did with Determined's posts and seeing negativity where there is none. *shrug*
@Determined: Ok man I see what you’re saying now. I actually forgot that Sarge made out with her. Although now that I know that, my I would actually double down on the advice I would have originally given however I will respect Sarge’s wishes and his journal.
@Sarge: No problem man. Do your thing. My intention was not to try and attack you nor discourage you. It’s just that your situation kinda reminded me of a situation that took place very recently. Basically, me and this chick had been friends for a while although she in the past had feelings for me in a romantic sense but earlier this year when I decided to reciprocate she reneged because she only saw me as a friend at which point I said in so many words “either we date/f*ck or we don’t hang out at all” . She accepted that and we parted ways amicably. A couple days ago, she first asked me about a review on a recent movie that came out and then a day later asked me if I would like to go with her this weekend. I replied “It depends...are we going as ‘just friends’ or something else?” I wanted to make it clear that a platonic friendship was NOT an option for me.
It slightly reminded me of your HD situation because you mentioned that your HD (and other women) would show a lot of interest and then it suddenly would fizzle out. I know that in MY situation I wanted to actually date the chick I was talking to and at minimum f*ck her but I knew I wasn’t willing to settle for just a friendship. My objective in this particular circumstance was to get her to admit to me either through words or actions whether she was going to a) reciprocate my desires, interests and intentions or b) reject my desires, interests, and intentions. Either option would help prevent me from wasting anymore time with her.
But that was MY situation, not yours. My main objective in that particular interaction was a bit different (from what I’ve gathered) from your objective with your HD. That’s why I’m honoring your request to not give you advice because my advice may not help you with your goals. Please don’t take what I wrote as something that I want YOU to do. I wanted you to clearly know my thought process and to understand my desire was NOT to try and amog, derail, “player hate”, or any sh!t like that.
Tldr; we’re different people, with different objectives and I respect your wishes to leave you in peace as you requested.
Peace.
Hey K-Train, I appreciate your input, really. I didn't think you were attacking me at all, I just had to draw the line and let you guys know where I stood on this.
As I said, I have no problems with advice if it is helping me achieve my goals. If you can't give me any advice aside from "next her" irt my HD, you can by all means offer me advise about other women (I should post more approaches I guess so you guys can
)
In the case of my HD, we are not hanging out. I'm not following her around, I'm not texting her everyday. So I really don't see why guys think I am. I see her twice a week when she cuts my hair. If she's ioi-ing me or boobing me and laughing with me I shoot her a quick text to see if she wants to hang out. If not, I simply don't text her again. I'm not chasing, only responding to her ioi's.
So yeah, it's a bit different from your situation, but I also think that a woman never wants to take responsibility, so if you can ignore the urge to need her to overtly say "ok, we'll f*ck" you might be able to f*ck her anyways.
Anyhow, thank you for respecting my wishes. Just please don't mistake my boundary for a "don't ever talk to me or comment on my journal", that's not the case at all, and your insight and anecdote has been helpful in clarifying things for myself. So thank you.
End of an era.
Today was my last day working at my sales job. Can't say I'm sad to see it go, but I do wonder how things would have been if I had made some key changes earlier.
Now it's to another city to do sales there. If I got the job (still waiting on them. Though I've signed contracts already, they just need to check my references). So yeah, we'll see how things go. Moving forward I really want to get my social area handled. That means friends and dates. I also want to get my career handled, and to start playing basketball, and move further towards my weight goals (Really hard to shed all the fat I put on and recently I seem to be getting more fat even though I know I'm not eating as much due to job hunting)
Anyhow, We'll see how things go. If all the jobs I've applied to fall through, then I'm thinking I'd better go to school to up my skills as I obviously am not good enough at my current level.
Reading more Tony Robbins. Great stuff. Always helps me see solutions or that nothing is impossible.
I'm already longing to be back on AM though lol. The confidence and the zen is so good. I don't really have that atm.
Tony Robbins says we need to ask better questions to get better results in our lives. He told the story of a man who went to a concentration camp, watched his entire family get shot before his eyes, then went on to escape. He escaped by constantly asking himself "How can I escape? How do I get out of here?"
I wonder if it works the same with social skills.
"How can I get people to respect me?"
"How can I have lasting relationships with quality people?"
Gonna think on this.
I'm sure I'm not the only one, but I wish there was an "everything" sub.
Alpha Male with DMSI included.
Reading all these self-improvement books makes me see I really need to get back to my core mission. But the downside of AM is it isn't really helpful with regards to seduction.
Just wish a sub helped you become the man you want to be in all areas.