My confidence and dominance gets off the charts. Its madness, I can't even begin to describe what this stage does. The zen state gets more and more an reality, worries and doubts are reduced, yet im still shifting in attraction and sudden something kicks in that it is ridiculous. Im growing cold splitsecond, disinterest and just feeling of it being an drag. Going along those lines I can dump someone icecold, almost lacking empathy.
Getting more looks at the gym, one fit girl made eye contact, said goodbyes when I was done at the gym. another guy was almost dying to talk to me, like following me until I took my head¨phones out.
Walked out of the gym and an girl in an car parked next to mine smiled and said hi. No tension, just doing my thing.
I was somewhat taken back by my eyes this morning, like, they were different and very intense, like way different and I have an noticable aura. Like an walking king on the earth and transcending everything. Everything is possible, this stage makes it all possible.
Edit1: this whole dreamy feeling when being turned on makes me feel in ways beta and my behaviour still gets beta. I don't know what or how to think about it but I'm getting suspicious when its not 1 on 1, like, still an part of me doesnt believe it. feels pretty messed up.
Old patterns but realize I'm very dominant in ways. sex doesnt bother me, at times I have moments of hatred and not giving an fuck about it all, like leave the fuck alone or something.
Im taking it really far with the girl i'm currently busy with but something feels not good, I'm one moment pretty stable, the other moment I''m feeling not stable at all. Makes me think about the other journals in which one becomes so high valuer and unbothered with it all. Feeling little bit depressed because of the thought and lots is swirling through my head.
Had the same kind of stuff with the former stages if I recall correctly. Sad, teary.
Thinking about the sentence "i love you"feels very beta to me and is something Ican't get out at this point and probably never will. Its one of the most beta sentences in my eyes. Also, am sort of aware about developing certain feelings, Im feeling pretty boss atm, and am for open relationships, no claiming and settling. Raw dominance perhaps.
I have an hard time with acceptance and it pisses me right off.
Slept with an girl last weekend and now the attraction seems to die down, mixed signals and shit while I'm awesome and don't give a shit, yet this flips to neediness in minutes. Im getting increased paranoid aswell, even after wtaht happened I'm getting still suspicious, like what the fuck. Simple eye contact causes abundance mindset, and there seem to be an increase in eye fucking aswell.
getting cocnrete plans and feeling attractive, no doubt, intertwining business with law of attraction and just running with the diea, launching stuff.
Some neediness is surfacing and it fucking sucks. The paranoia is kinda fucked up, and shows my overanalyzing behaviour, girls/women arent logical but emotional creatures. also realizing some fear and letting it go. Its an massive insecurity which I normally can't be bothered with, and it pretty much makes me foggy headwise and conflicting.It makes me even angry and pissed off.
Affirmations/law of attraction opens the world.
having an strong pull towards gratitude and am rolling currently on it, making all other stuff flow aswell, building my life up and shaping my reality.
I don't care what women think or want and it is liberating. I can't be bothered.
The programming is kicking in deeper, and walking in the store today I felt like the highest status person there and people seem to notice this, Eye fucking gets more intens, people turn heads from afar now.
Definitely have some breakthroughs going on and realizations. If I "lose"someone, it isn't an issue at all.
Starting gratitude lists and thinking in possibilities, embracing work as an continuüm, flowing, having new ideas popping up constantly, its pretty much unfolding before my eyes. Feeling unstoppable and euphoric. All is directed and set in motion. fear is dissolving further, Still can't wait for this stage to kick in even deeper. My focus is insane and my mind runs with lots of ideas but clear this time. I know I am alpha, yet I'm already going beyond that. having lots of business ideas goign around and am certain I will bring it out. Leadership and dominance, so many concepts are falling away simultaneously and am very focussed on myself aswell. Focussed on the world aswell, AM^makes me review my life and life in general ( seeking the challenge? )
makes me wonder how well I would respond on BASE. When done with AM its not the end of business work and selfdeveloping ( limiting former belief )
Its an almost obsessive focus, very intens. I don't need an break, I can go on for hours and keep working. Strong Drive in every way. reviewing my own behaviour aswell. I know what I want.
Girl at work showing massive IOI's suddenly, chatted her up a bit. She mirrored me, smiled, made multiple times eye contact bui I can't be bothered. Talked with another guy about diet, plans and stuff, routines and what not. Also with another woman about business. Its all networking now.
Feeling very calm currently right now, in balance. reading some christian mcqueen stuff in terms of texting less then her and this was my urge aswell to do so. the rest feels very beta. Mission comes first, the rest is bonus. Its destroying by blowing up the phone. Time = precious. Trival things are waste. Qualification.
Its aswell refreshing to read on his blog, abaout how you basically owe her nothing. I had some guilt popping up, yet making me feel like shit simultaneously.
The current girl I have slept with and in which my attention was lost, suddenly tekst again after I became more distant, asking me what I do and stuff, realizing I'm in control. tekst overload only kills and smugs it all up. Doing what ever I want to do.
Note to self, You owe nothing to an girl, having my own life to live, doing my own thing, my mission and keep working at it. In fact, she has left 3 messages currently but I will not respond right now. Be okay with losing her, its in fact an fucked up mindset to start off with. Abundance.
Got the flu I suppose, feeling all weak and stuff. Also realize that I'm getting in contact with my softer side only to transcend it and going beyiond, becoming more fully realized. Not happy with the flu as it feels like time wasting.
Thoughts on becoming apex predator, tribe leader, dominance. How I will leave the old stuff behind and it feels like the beta inside of me is dying. I'm also growing more indifferent and self-actualisation and development is central, not women. I can't stand weakness in myself. I'm feeling different. Leaving the old program behind and becoming more alpha. In ways I don't really care anymore about alpha.
The approach stuff from stage 2 is less apparent. I'm easily chatting and in the moment but some part of me can't be bothered. Something to dig deep in to as I want to have the full spectrum. Had thoughts about control and letting control of that and being just present. Control is abstract.
Man. You're journal is getting me to look forward to my next run of AM6. Being self actualised is such a beautiful thing
Wondering if my voice is hypnotic as the girl I slept with fell in trance on my voice like she never did before. Also suspecting I am working her sexual triggers.
People qualify themselves by asking for advice. Also realisation instead of theory that I shouldnt ask but lead, sucking her and people in my frame. I don't really care. Not being indifferent but when people expect you to lead. Sort of oblivious to that.
More dominant through presence.
Still getting paranoid but know fucking multiple girls is mine. Paranoia roots in overanalyzing.
The subs eems to make come in contact with my softer side and spoke with someone today about it. Its like all those weaknesses surface one after another. Becoming all needy and soft feeling, almost the opposite and just an bit whiney and very affectionate.
Porn ruins for me, real experience is way better, and looking at porn makes me feel lower value.
Had an reality shift today which was Obvious. external reality switched almost, everythign was different suddenly, like my perception on people and teh traffic.
getting eye fucked pretty much lately, smiles yet this feels all so natural.
Seeing myself as absolutely high value to the point I'm looking upon people from some helicopter view kind off place. Definitely the sub doing something deeper. Its growth every time, every moment. Like, I vibe with someone but its all good, no matter what happens, no outcome just enjoying, not caring.
Still having the flu and my whole body is sore. Had an disturbing dream involving underage stuff which I resisted strongly, running and fighting, involving kids being all cheery and involving some silhouette morphings. I was conscious the whole time and fought it. Feels like an very important part and still something thats going on right now while I'm awake.
My presence amongst friends seems to become stronger and stronger. Very direct and open, all tension is stonewalled over through my presence.
If I feel the urge to quit listening it reflects myself and my character. Its almost like an mastering of the sub in that way, as in some sort of rite. Just keep listening, those moments are transforming and put you to the test.
For some reason I'm really looking forward to stage 4.
Lots of memories from my childhood surfacing including flashbacks. I also seem to get in touch with my child side which is progress. Also am unphased by people judging, it doesnt mean shit to me, aswell as seeing how few people actual take responsibility for themseves while lots of people go all external blame and stuff. Powerfull to realize I am in full control yet dont have to at the same time.
Something other has awakened in my aswell in terms of being sexual, like an fire ignited. Im having sex cravings aswell as becoming more arrogant and vey dominant and not giving an fuck at all. yesterday when meeting up with some people I outright ignored and showed disinterest and it made them very uncomfortable, felt very high value and just powerfull forcefull in presence. I socially flow really easy lately and just talk. I can't place the feeling of what it is, only that it is alpha.
More inclined to succeed in self sufficiency in terms of financials and life itself. Being high value in all areas, fucking women, yet dont give much of an shit right now about them. There is still some neediness in me which causes and stirrs up some anxiety and clouds my mind but I see myself with multiple women at the same time. Pretty non emotional as I write this.
My presence seem to be noticed, no matter what I say or do, in some way I easily hook up girls, like knowing eachother for years and stuff, almost as if I naturally shift and succeed in the deal. Clearly the sub doing its thing. Also, there is no area that is excluded to meet women/girls. All is possible, may it be tinder, chats, on the Streets, whatever. No exclusion.
lately gravitating towards undoing social/socitial programming and its layers Black Dragon style. AM makes me encounter many layers and beliefs one after another only to grow furtherm, becoming more agressive and not giving an shit at all. My mind is catapulting.
Also getting more agressive in traffic when people mass and am even ready to become physical and dominant aggressive. No bs programming kikcing in. Yet also playing eye games in traffic and just enjoying life.
Feeling almost arrogant confident yet it doesn't bother me. I have so many ideas going around in terms of business and living abundantly.