Today I started SM3. As with AM6 I will journal my progress from time to time. I will try to do weekly updates but depending how much is going on the intervals can be shorter or longer. For now I just can tell that SM3 feels relaxing and comfortable at this time. Let's see how it continues.
Looking forward to following your SM journey
I had a crazy dream last night. I was in bed with four women, but not in a sexual way, we just slept. At some point one of them started to make out with an old man. The girl lying next to me (I know that girl in real) didn't want to see it any more and went out of bed. It looked like she was sad because she wasn't even able to get such an old and ugly guy. An other woman (from another bed, which I also know in real) went with her to comfort her. After I realized the old guy is putting his elbow in my back I turned to him to talk to him about that. At this moment he turned to me and I got shocked. It was probably the most ugly guy my subconscious was able to create without becoming completely non-human. I would say the hillbillies from wrong turn look even nicer but less human. I told him that he is taking my space what's not okay. I think I said also something else but I don't remember. After that the guy disappeared (or just left, I am not sure) and I woke up.
Besides of the dream I was in the city today and most people just drove me nuts. They seemed all so slow and undecided. I was happy when I was at home again.
Things starts to change. First how I think about certain things. In the past when setting up a date I was thinking things like "I hope I get a girlfriend" or "Hope I get laid" of "Hope I get at least a second date". You see the patter? Get, get, get... Unfortunately it doesn't work that way. I wanted to get things like that but I didn't do anything or just little about it and sometimes just the wrong things. And one more thing I realized is being too much goal oriented in terms of sex brings you nowhere. Probably I knew this stuff already on a certain level but now it comes all to the surface. However, two days ago I wanted to set up a date with someone I met online. And while messaging her I was just thinking "I hope we have a good time together". See the difference? And this time it wasn't like "Well I have to think this way so I get sex", no, it was what I really thought and felt.
I am also more enjoying just to have a quick chat with a woman. I doesn't have to be for long, but I feel just good about it. And like Geodude I am also starting to get free stuff and discounts. So for example I needed new photos and got two extra. She said it's a special offer. But looking around in this shop there wasn't a single hint that they had an offer like this. Later I got thirsty and went to the supermarket just to grab something I can drink. I ended up just paying one third of the listed price... Had also some more of them the week.
In the city were also people who try to sell some stuff. I usually don't talk to the people anymore but the girl stopped me was cute, so I thought a quick chat is fine anyway, maybe I make an interview with her when she is done and ask her for her number
Unfortunately a guy (who sells the same stuff) joined us and I wasn't comfortable anymore, at least not for some more private conversation and for asking her for her number. So far for now.
Free stuff and discounts is a sign that they like you. In men, it's usually an attempt to bribe you into liking them back, and from women the same, but they have an ulterior motive... in this case, usually they're hoping it leads to some sort of sexual interaction. It's her way of trying to get something started. Reward her by making it so. :-)
(09-20-2014, 02:17 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Reward her by making it so. :-)
I will do my best
(09-20-2014, 04:16 PM)sebastian Wrote: [ -> ]I will do my best
Wow, i see you're making progress dude... keep it up..
This night I had a pretty intense dream about a particular girl. I wanted to leave the town but she didn't want I leave because she liked me and I knew I was important to her. But because of the situation I got with her I decided to leave. I wrote a brief letter where I told her that I really like her and she is important for me, too, but under this circumstances I had to leave. While leaving the town two dogs joined me. They want I lead them but they even wanted me to feel better in this situation. Don't know how to interpret the dogs in the dream, because dogs don't have a special meaning to me. But anyway, it was so intense that I was already crying before I woke up.
After the dream I also realized that I don't want to play some manipulative pua games with women (much of the stuff is just manipulative), I want something real with women. And with something real I don't mean falling in love or becoming exclusive. I wanna have a deeper connection and enjoy the time with them, no matter what we are doing. It also doesn't men I don't want sex anymore, but it's not the only thing I got in mind. It's impressive because it is just day 10 of the first stage and actually I feel like I am growing on steroids.
Last week I tried some PSTEC on an issue I couldn't handle with FEFT. At least there was almost no effect with FEFT. The good thing is it worked and the thing I cleared has no effect anymore. The bad thing is from that time I cleared this issue with PSTEC it seems like I lost my light and flirty state and feel serious and heavy instead. Have been thinking if it has something to do with not being able to focus on that topic too good. But maybe it's just some resistance came up, don't know. But I think I will avoid PSTEC in the near future just to be sure. Besides of this I was in the city and noticed that some women looked at my crotch after taking a quick look into my eyes - which is new. Anyway, I feel still somehow heavy and yesterday in the city I felt really needy and was looking after almost every good looking woman. Hope I get over it soon.
(09-28-2014, 06:21 AM)sebastian Wrote: [ -> ]Last week I tried some PSTEC on an issue I couldn't handle with FEFT. At least there was almost no effect with FEFT. The good thing is it worked and the thing I cleared has no effect anymore. The bad thing is from that time I cleared this issue with PSTEC it seems like I lost my light and flirty state and feel serious and heavy instead. Have been thinking if it has something to do with not being able to focus on that topic too good. But maybe it's just some resistance came up, don't know. But I think I will avoid PSTEC in the near future just to be sure. Besides of this I was in the city and noticed that some women looked at my crotch after taking a quick look into my eyes - which is new. Anyway, I feel still somehow heavy and yesterday in the city I felt really needy and was looking after almost every good looking woman. Hope I get over it soon.
I'm having this too. I wonder if it's a "shock" reflex that your mind does now that the thing is gone. Almost like you have no security. I feel very needy right now, also vulnerable, and helpless. I'm wondering if when you erase an issue, it may also bring a deeper (and more problematic) one to the surface.
Just guesses. Geodude or stratos might know more.
(09-28-2014, 06:31 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]I'm having this too. I wonder if it's a "shock" reflex that your mind does now that the thing is gone. Almost like you have no security. I feel very needy right now, also vulnerable, and helpless. I'm wondering if when you erase an issue, it may also bring a deeper (and more problematic) one to the surface.
Just guesses. Geodude or stratos might know more.
Yeah, had this thoughts, too. Let's wait what the experts say.
Tap on the heavy feeling or pstec on it. If you have a light and flirty way of being, and pstec one day brings up deep & heavy stuff to the surface inadvertently, in my opinion it's a gift because you can remove it and get back to the light and flirty state. tap or pstec on it being there, not knowing what it is, not liking it, etc.