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Ran 2 loops ultra sonic. Today is a great day. Baseline seems to turn upwards, lots of "fog" has been parted, I feel confident, good, sure and lit. Had a great talk this morning with a new psych. Im not so sure about her personally wise, but her work model is great and effective. I was comfortable in public and things are being worked out smoothly. Future looks bright. Temper is way down, which is cool as I feel more alpha aswell. Its as if tge clouds are moving and am back again to my heart-self. Lotsa inspiration, leadership qualities and creativity. Creativity is key!
Also, my neighbours dogs dont piss me off anymore. Its funny to me now while feeling bulletproof.
Everything turns up and is positive!!!!
Autoconfig is clear in instructions. Amount of loops, format, days on and off. Lately I had the recurring thought of "playing it safe" so, I had 5 loops US in this morning, and im pleased. I just pressed the repeat button to see when I got the "stop signal" which is ALSO autoconfig. Lmao. Im feeling good, playfull. Unfiltered. Some heavy things going on internally. Lets go. I feel like damon salvatore and his cockiness. Getting under peoples skin, like a continuous push pull, calling people out, knowing the impact of names, seeing women as nature. Energy introduces before the physical appears. So you can penetrate her subconscious by going off on that. Pure intent. Also mind, soul and heart. Parts you can engage in. Oh man, this is so lethal. You dont have to touch her to touch her. Pimps know that.
Highest form of game = no game. Honesty truth love.
Giving orders and directions waving your finger to tell her we go, to come over and what not, aint something offlimits at all. Fear is just in the way, be the director. Its frame holding. Organically so. You already are frame.
OF teaches me also that im already all that and can relax and let people come up go me.
I do had some strong realisations yesterday around my upbringing but do not want to share, but it was good. Made lots of sense. Funny how, when I was on the way there, how some talk over psychologist incompetence surfaced. Not to entertain abd going in depth over it, but IML falling on deaf ears, IML being to out there for them to understand being it a guessing game and not truly getting what we are doing here.
Edit: DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH FUCKING CHOICE WE HAVE?! We take so much for granted, are plugged into shit that we aint have to, thinking we aint got no choice. Bruh. Its chess. F*CKING OFv3!
AM6 vibes... so it begins.
"I know that you are in love with me, and anybody capable of love is capable of being safed" this destroyed me. I dont believe I can be safed on some level. The trauma hurts and im crying like a lil bitch. Lonely, being alone, everything. Some very very young part of me, early years are being hit by OF. Around 5 years old if not younger. Healing. Very young parts of me are expressing and being expressed and idk why im even writing this.
Bordering hyperventilation right now. The tears wont stop. Like the plug is being pulled out.
Im so sorry. :'(
This is the video that cause me to break down. It did the same on AM6. Healing never finished. OF is simply going deeper.
There is lots of sadness and emotions behind my day to day actions.
After the purge, a slight headache came up, my energy got noticed by way more by people in traffic for example aswell as just on the streets. Got even a car-dance with some random chick. Instant vibe till the lights got green. Dunno why there was no fear in her. Direct overwrite? Pretty much DMSI like goals in nature, the kind Shannon is after. My perception of myself is success and more mature. Its amazing how it acts like a free agent. With OF things simply flow. Journalling makes no sense really due the speed of the sub. Its already done, old news, nothing out of the ordinairy, relentless acceptance. Moving through the motions, ut is what it is, events.
Vibe wont lie. She can say that she is single or not, but is she single for you?
After running those 5 loops of ultrasonic, there is no craving anymore for loops at all. I do sense some roll-calling going on internally, which could be autoconfig determining the loops to be ran, but other then that? Nope. My way of talking is changing positively. I remember a post from Shannon, which was in his ums journal, in which he wrote how he talked to his parts and how they are becoming wealthy. Now, OF seems to handle this as I caught myself doing this. Other parts encouraging eachother. Its pretty neat. I caught myself saying 'we will succeed" to "We succeed" to "we are succeeding" to "we are successfull, we succeeded".
Fear is nowhere to be found, other then subtle maybe.
Anyway, im facing perfectionism, which seems to stem from my dad, and thus have integrated it. I talked with my dad on this subject, and maybe it comes from his militairy background, but according to me and my psych, we concluded that my fathers way of upbring in the form of criticism discipline, has integrated in me. Prolly as far as an introject in my psyche/energy body. It does feel like that. And when we talked about this, I literally had flashbacks and what.
Anyway, perfectionism is a response to it. Procrastination another, fear of failure, fear of whatever. It can lead to never even beginning the task.
Another is noticing the "what will others think?" It might not be vocal, but more an energetic link, something that latches. Ive broken off from an group of people and its been 2 years now, and still it sneaks in at times. Crazy how it influences behaviour in such as way. Like a hidden drive.
2 ultrasonic loops in. ( 12/7/21)
My idgaf is vitalized. Unattached, filled with lifeforce. Pinnacle of being alive. A sense of being at home and grinding tf out of anything and everything. Blocks no longer there, just get to work. Organic expression instead of perfectionism.
Lost interest in all distraction. Dropped like a house of cards. Radiant energy from within like an aztec emperor.
Felt locks coming off within like captain america
This sense of a river with huge undercurrent that accelarates is pretty neat.
Fears mean nothing to me anymore. Strength is generated from within like the sun.
Journalling seems to be unwise right now. Just live life. Fears are busted down 1 by one. I dont even know what fear is anymore
Almost foreign. Alien. Something that irrational to even acknowledge and just strange, like "why?"
Tindr texts says now "the one your mother told you to stsy away from" eh? *shrug* not that im that active on it, which is fine. I have the choice to jump on it whenever the fuck I want to
Wanting to hop on gear is stronger lately. My testostorone levels seem to be higher aswell. Guess fear removal free's up testlevels. Dunno where this came from.
When I was done training and drove home, I saw this fine brunette walking. We locked eyes and I thought "being in love is so cool" followed by "those redpill coaches are bitter af" today I wanted to be left alone.
Some scarcity is surfacing regarding wealth and finances. I tried to squash it before ( seemed to be similar while running ums, this actively trying to make it work) but I merely supressed it. Adressing and going through it now. Fear of death(?) It proved to be smoke and mirrors. Resisting and coping keeps it alive. I found myself saying it out loud, repeating what it is, and it dissolved. Fear of adressing it and avoiding it? Check. Acknowledging and going through it opens up new ways and options.
Im already taking 2 days off again. Less is more. Trusting myself more.
Im doing really really well on 2 loops ultrasonic. Im still somewhat in the mood of "leave me alone" but thats pasding/fading slowly. After running 2loops this morning, I executed instantly and things simply unfolded. Its the sweetspot for me. First sub I favor ultrasonic and do very well on.
Im really damn comfy with myself in public, which is awesome.
Fears are noticably letting up.
Noticed a strong attitude in the gym bordering antisocial seeking conflict, a eort of tempting and certain fearlessness. I actually want to get in the ring now, which is a huge contrast.
Saw this woman on a bicycle. Obese. My go to thought is "how can someone let it come this far" now, I was thinking "but it could be medical" which peaked my interest in the medical field and im thrilled about it. On DMSI, I started studying and learing radiology. CT-scans, MRI-scans, fluor scans, that kinda stuff. Still got it in me merely writing this feels like a vocation and coming home to myself.
Im thriving. Euphoric. Im viewing myself as very good looking. Headturns are present as ever and I catch myself locking eyes after I already locked. Autopilot.
Im singing while driving nowadays. I was fearless at the phone this morning. It was amazing.
Fears are removed one by one. You did it Shannon, you did it!
(07-14-2021, 06:37 AM)Kol Wrote: [ -> ]Im doing really really well on 2 loops ultrasonic. Im still somewhat in the mood of "leave me alone" but thats pasding/fading slowly. After running 2loops this morning, I executed instantly and things simply unfolded. Its the sweetspot for me. First sub I favor ultrasonic and do very well on.
Im really damn comfy with myself in public, which is awesome.
Fears are noticably letting up.
Noticed a strong attitude in the gym bordering antisocial seeking conflict, a eort of tempting and certain fearlessness. I actually want to get in the ring now, which is a huge contrast.
Saw this woman on a bicycle. Obese. My go to thought is "how can someone let it come this far" now, I was thinking "but it could be medical" which peaked my interest in the medical field and im thrilled about it. On DMSI, I started studying and learing radiology. CT-scans, MRI-scans, fluor scans, that kinda stuff. Still got it in me merely writing this feels like a vocation and coming home to myself.
Im thriving. Euphoric. Im viewing myself as very good looking. Headturns are present as ever and I catch myself locking eyes after I already locked. Autopilot.
Im singing while driving nowadays. I was fearless at the phone this morning. It was amazing.
Fears are removed one by one. You did it Shannon, you did it!
Very pleased you're getting such good results!
Awesome! Im brimming with gratitude, while OF simply is going deeper and deeper. Im running OFv3 for aprox 50 days now and already I have this sense OF is hitting the final fear. All other things I was semi fussing about already showed itself to be irrelevant, im good in all the other areas. Then again, this "final fear" thing could be sabotage yet I have zero inclination to not fulfill the 6 months. Im really looking forward whats next in excitement with this sub. Nothing but love and gratitude. Its just fascinating what is unfolding with this and how much selflove it brings.
From the bottom of my heart, im gratefull for what youve done Shannon. Thank you.
Survival mindset hit me LIke a truck. I have no words...
I have the humor of my dad
I never even thought I would become like this or even admit this. The growth it reflects, jeeeeez
F*CKING OFv3! <3
Edit: im having so much fun in public right now. Just being social, loud, playfull, extravert. My journalling starts to become a way of re-enforcing nothing but positivity. I aint capping, its writing down realness.
I notice attraction aint binairy. I saw this mesomorph guy just singing on his bike, and I was suddenly thinking "women are attracted by such display of masculinity" he was pretty big, so protection? Its been a thing and I realise how much influence other coaches can have in boxing you in, thus missing a shitton of women that are attracted to you.
My communication with my subconscious is way more clear nowadays. Its a huge theme with OFv3. Removal of fear is the main factor. Im realizing as im journalling. Its limitless, endless possibilities with my subconscious.
I do have a huge headache. Its just there. OF shielding works amazingly well. It just there. I aint doing anything with it. No biggie.
Im greeting people left and right. The responses are diverse. I realize its not always me. I used to blame and statecrash, which would throw me in light depression, guilt and shame, but now im considering the other person. Im releasing more trauma, I now see. With people I used to have light polarizing friction, I seem to really deepen on a positive note. Its amazing. It opens doors to possible attraction.
(07-16-2021, 03:38 AM)Kol Wrote: [ -> ]Awesome! Im brimming with gratitude, while OF simply is going deeper and deeper. Im running OFv3 for aprox 50 days now and already I have this sense OF is hitting the final fear. All other things I was semi fussing about already showed itself to be irrelevant, im good in all the other areas. Then again, this "final fear" thing could be sabotage yet I have zero inclination to not fulfill the 6 months. Im really looking forward whats next in excitement with this sub. Nothing but love and gratitude. Its just fascinating what is unfolding with this and how much selflove it brings.
From the bottom of my heart, im gratefull for what youve done Shannon. Thank you.
Thank
you for USING IT, EXECUTING IT, and CONTINUING TO USE IT. That's how shit gets accomplished.
At my parents right now and feeling lightly drained and depressed, clearly something going on under the hood. Memories are surfacing. Im now getting out of the rut. OF is like a rocket going off, without anytjing able to stop it. Meanwhile fears are selected, exposed and released. Fear around age ( its something that bothered, fear of missing out, not good enough ) aswell as fear masquerading as morality.
Im somewhat emotional right now. My isolating tendencies are exposed as beaing fears. As another excuse.
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