Shannon's Journal Discussion

[chaosvrgn]

Not sure real experiences can be 'stupid ass'. I was commenting on the superficiality of women, not getting angry about anyone stealing white women. And as I said, the black men I was talking about were friends. There wasn't resentment, just observation, over and over and over again. Oh and it wasn't their pickup ability or personality, the women made a beeline for them without them doing anything.

Oh yes, "real experiences" can MOST DEFINITELY be stupid-ass. You claim that you'd go to the club with your black friends, and the women would make a beeline straight for them because they're black.

While that MAY be a true story, what's "stupid-ass" is the assumption that they went for your friends because of their race, all other considerations notwithstanding.

Women tend to go for the highest value, highest status male in a group, PERIOD. If your argument is that society perceives black men as "higher status" than white men, I've got a bridge to sell you.

And since women don't NATURALLY approach (women are selectors, men compete for their attention), it's much more likely that your black friends were also:

* In better shape
* Taller
* Better dressed
* Better groomed
* Better at seduction (pro-tip: polarize the situation quickly, trying to be a "friend" puts you in the friendzone, regardless of the nonsense that women will tell you -- just look at what Shannon was saying a few threads ago about their cognitive dissonance)

And what's pissing you off about this situation, what's making you resentful is this: You thought your +5 white man bonus would elevate you above your black friends, and when it didn't, your ego and your feelz got hurt, leading you to resent black people.

And THAT'S what makes your "real experiences" stupid ass. It ain't the fact that it happened. It's your interpretation and subsequent response. Instead of lifting yourself up to the best that you can be, you blame an outside force beyond your control (and of all things to choose, "man, if i were black, my life would be better"). That's some serious mental gymnastics. I don't think you'd be able to handle life as a black man in America, holmes.

Like seriously, this is some Eliot Rodgers kinda mess. I think E2 to clear out faulty emotional beliefs and AM6 to make you feel like a high status man would help.

[RisingSon]

Western white women have been conditioned by the media for YEARS to see white men as effeminate/weak and black men as strong/dominant.
Same thing is going on in Europe with the refugee situation.

Like the late great Patrice O'Neal has comically stated, you are just her FOOD and she is playing with you.

Here's a bonus vid on how the black community was destabilized first as an experiment (starts at about 5:00 min):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15iuq9OTTsE

[dissonance]

Is it ok to listen to the 5 loops not consecutively, but rather spread out in the day? Like 2 loops here, 2 loops a few hours later, 1 loop later? I'm one of those that don't like listening to subs while sleeping.

[Dilettante]

I am a hispanic-looking shorter asian man but I can relate to terry's and catman's dilemma. I don't get a lot of attention either. so yeah I don't have my +5 bonus either but I'm just as disadvantaged as white men in the dating game.

women like confidence and black men have self confidence whereas I willingly admit have doubts about myself. women in the west tend to be very self assured and confident this seeking a mate that supercedes her confidence.

it's also a pattern I've observed over and over, that black men, who are self confident (willing to approach hard and risk rejection) tend to go home with women from the club/bar/whatever at the end of the night. whereas my charming but demurred self goes home alone. It's definitely frustrating when women seem to choose the same type of guys over and over.

will you be discounting my experiences as stupid ass too?

[dissonance]

I am a hispanic-looking shorter asian man but I can relate to terry's and catman's dilemma. I don't get a lot of attention either. so yeah I don't have my +5 bonus either but I'm just as disadvantaged as white men in the dating game.

women like confidence and black men have self confidence whereas I willingly admit have doubts about myself. women in the west tend to be very self assured and confident this seeking a mate that supercedes her confidence.

it's also a pattern I've observed over and over, that black men, who are self confident (willing to approach hard and risk rejection) tend to go home with women from the club/bar/whatever at the end of the night. whereas my charming but demurred self goes home alone. It's definitely frustrating when women seem to choose the same type of guys over and over.

will you be discounting my experiences as stupid ass too?

it also largely depends on the area, and the city, or crowd even...

[eternity]

I know first hand that being Indian gave me a disadvantage.... BECAUSE I ALLOWED IT TO affect my reality. It used to be a major hang up of mine, until I ran sm3, then E2. Now I don't suffer from that self limiting belief anymore.

TheRealJustin and I had a back and forth discussion on my sm3 journal, and it really put things into perspective.

If you have enough of what she's looking for, the race factor won't play as strongly as you think.

And chaosvrgn, I know you make your judgment based on data from okcupid, but I don't think the way a woman thinks on a dating site is congruent with the way she thinks in a 1 on 1 interaction with a new guy she just met.
She HAS to make a selection, based on pre set parameters, in order to access the site and see her options. So the site gave her a bias before she even started browsing.

In reality, If he plays his cards right with her, she'll go home with him. I doubt in the heat of the moment she will say "OH SHIT HE'S INDIAN" or "OH SHIT HE'S BLACK" and then realize she is really racist on the inside and cut the interaction short.

I never pictured myself dating a black girl but one time the opportunity presented itself during my sm3 run, and I thought to myself "hey let's see where this goes".

It's not so black and white, to make a punny. Interaction can be dynamic, and race is only a small part of it, but it won't be an issue if you don't allow it to be.

I was thoroughly surprised to find out through the grape vine the variety of races that had the hots for me during my sm3 run... various white women, a Puerto rican, 2 black girls, (1 hood and 1 Nigerian), mixed white and black..... that almost ENTIRELY squashed my preconceived notion that being Indian was a handicap.

[chaosvrgn]

I am a hispanic-looking shorter asian man but I can relate to terry's and catman's dilemma. I don't get a lot of attention either. so yeah I don't have my +5 bonus either but I'm just as disadvantaged as white men in the dating game.

women like confidence and black men have self confidence whereas I willingly admit have doubts about myself. women in the west tend to be very self assured and confident this seeking a mate that supercedes her confidence.

it's also a pattern I've observed over and over, that black men, who are self confident (willing to approach hard and risk rejection) tend to go home with women from the club/bar/whatever at the end of the night. whereas my charming but demurred self goes home alone. It's definitely frustrating when women seem to choose the same type of guys over and over.

will you be discounting my experiences as stupid ass too?

You recognize that there's other elements in play, such as self-confidence. You openly admitted that you lack confidence and it prevents you from approaching women with the same level of boldness as your black peers. Dating is a high-risk (arguably) high-reward process. If you can't handle rejection, you won't succeed. As men, we're molded in the flames of rejection. We're mentally and physically built to withstand rejection and failure. Women couldn't handle the sheer amount of day-to-day rejection that we experience as men.

See the difference? Terry said that his black friends "weren't any better at pickup and didn't have better personalities," insinuating that race was the ONLY difference between them. While it may be frustrating, at least you're recognizing that there IS something you can work on and that's what turns the situation into a moment of mental and spiritual alchemy, rather than "why all da white wimmenz with da black menz."

But, I'll make myself clear: Screaming, "omg, you're discounting my experiences," means little to nothing to me because we're talking two different languages. I don't believe that every opinion is equal, I don't believe that every opinion has value, nor do I feel like I should respect everyone's opinion on virtue of "reasons".

[terry44]

Not sure real experiences can be 'stupid ass'. I was commenting on the superficiality of women, not getting angry about anyone stealing white women. And as I said, the black men I was talking about were friends. There wasn't resentment, just observation, over and over and over again. Oh and it wasn't their pickup ability or personality, the women made a beeline for them without them doing anything.

Oh yes, "real experiences" can MOST DEFINITELY be stupid-ass. You claim that you'd go to the club with your black friends, and the women would make a beeline straight for them because they're black.

While that MAY be a true story, what's "stupid-ass" is the assumption that they went for your friends because of their race, all other considerations notwithstanding.

Women tend to go for the highest value, highest status male in a group, PERIOD. If your argument is that society perceives black men as "higher status" than white men, I've got a bridge to sell you.

And since women don't NATURALLY approach (women are selectors, men compete for their attention), it's much more likely that your black friends were also:

* In better shape
* Taller
* Better dressed
* Better groomed
* Better at seduction (pro-tip: polarize the situation quickly, trying to be a "friend" puts you in the friendzone, regardless of the nonsense that women will tell you -- just look at what Shannon was saying a few threads ago about their cognitive dissonance)

And what's pissing you off about this situation, what's making you resentful is this: You thought your +5 white man bonus would elevate you above your black friends, and when it didn't, your ego and your feelz got hurt, leading you to resent black people.

And THAT'S what makes your "real experiences" stupid ass. It ain't the fact that it happened. It's your interpretation and subsequent response. Instead of lifting yourself up to the best that you can be, you blame an outside force beyond your control (and of all things to choose, "man, if i were black, my life would be better"). That's some serious mental gymnastics. I don't think you'd be able to handle life as a black man in America, holmes.

Like seriously, this is some Eliot Rodgers kinda mess. I think E2 to clear out faulty emotional beliefs and AM6 to make you feel like a high status man would help.

Oh dear, you really do make a lot of 'stupid ass' assumptions. You know nothing about me or my experiences, or what my black friends looked like (not taller than me, or any better dressed, or into PUA - this was in the 90s) but think you know more about me and my friends than I do. For stupid ass arrogance that really takes some beating. I see absolutely no need to continue such a stupid conversation.

[4Kingdoms]

Poll: Would you pay extra for Soft/Medium/Hard??
http://subliminal-talk.com/thread-7701.html

[Dilettante]

But, I'll make myself clear: Screaming, "omg, you're discounting my experiences," means little to nothing to me because we're talking two different languages. I don't believe that every opinion is equal, I don't believe that every opinion has value, nor do I feel like I should respect everyone's opinion on virtue of "reasons".

so that's a yes, you will discount everyone's experience and yours is the realest experience. Thanks for proving your arrogance. Goodbye.

[chaosvrgn]

If you have enough of what she's looking for, the race factor won't play as strongly as you think.

And chaosvrgn, I know you make your judgment based on data from okcupid, but I don't think the way a woman thinks on a dating site is congruent with the way she thinks in a 1 on 1 interaction with a new guy she just met.
She HAS to make a selection, based on pre set parameters, in order to access the site and see her options. So the site gave her a bias before she even started browsing.

The book I cited, Dataclysm, goes into exactly what you're talking about. It focuses on the incongruities between what people say on their profiles, and how they actually act. For example, women saying they don't care about race, but only messaging members of their own race.

Or, the most enlightening of the dating related extractions (there's a dope ass section on how Twitter is affecting language), he points out that when rating people on a scale of 1-10, men tend to rate women very fairly, resulting in a perfect bell curve. Women, however, rate men as either a 1 or a 10 with absolutely nothing in-between. According to his data (which has been verified as mathematically and statistically sound), the majority of women believe that 80% of men aren't good enough for her (there's that Pareto principle again) and yet, she STILL messages them.

There's a lot more at play here.

[chaosvrgn]

Oh dear, you really do make a lot of 'stupid ass' assumptions. You know nothing about me or my experiences, or what my black friends looked like (not taller than me, or any better dressed, or into PUA - this was in the 90s) but think you know more about me and my friends than I do. For stupid ass arrogance that really takes some beating. I see absolutely no need to continue such a stupid conversation.

so that's a yes, you will discount everyone's experience and yours is the realest experience. Thanks for proving your arrogance. Goodbye.

Used to respect and "consider" everyone's opinions even when they were clearly illogical and riddled with inconsistencies: Ended up losing everything I owned and went bankrupt.

Started taking people to task for saying things that made no sense, stopped making excuses and forged my own way through life: Became a successful entrepreneur in six months, making 2-3k/week.



** Goes back to "stealing" white women with DA POWER OF irresistible blackness. **
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGQ-ISsDm8M

[JJ54]

I am a hispanic-looking shorter asian man but I can relate to terry's and catman's dilemma. I don't get a lot of attention either. so yeah I don't have my +5 bonus either but I'm just as disadvantaged as white men in the dating game.

women like confidence and black men have self confidence whereas I willingly admit have doubts about myself. women in the west tend to be very self assured and confident this seeking a mate that supercedes her confidence.

it's also a pattern I've observed over and over, that black men, who are self confident (willing to approach hard and risk rejection) tend to go home with women from the club/bar/whatever at the end of the night. whereas my charming but demurred self goes home alone. It's definitely frustrating when women seem to choose the same type of guys over and over.

will you be discounting my experiences as stupid ass too?

What chaosvrgn is trying to say that it is all in your beliefs. If you think you don't have the confidence to get women, then guess what, you will never get the women that you desire. You set the tone of your reality, the women and the outside world only verifies it to you. That's why beliefs are important for the subconscious mind. Because what you believe is what your subconscious will verify to you.

I'll use myself as an example. I'm a black man myself, and I have a preference for Asian women. Am I their first choice most of the time? No, because they will usually go for white men before they go for black men. Now I can easily create a belief in my mind that "Asian women only like white men." However, that's not my belief. My belief is "Asian women love black men." And wouldn't you know it, I'm now attracting Asian women into my life.

So no, I'm not discounting your belief as stupid. But I will say that you need to change your belief that you're not self-confident. If you know women are attracted to you, then you will have no problem attracting the women you want.

[Dilettante]

For the record, we were arguing about superficiality.
Second, I find that my charming but demurred nature works overseas and I've had more attraction and dates outside of the anglosphere.

I am merely reporting my observations and concurring with others.

The issue was not self confidence, the issue was superficiality.

but it was reinterpreted as something else which I will not go retreading over.

but I appreciate the advise. thank you.