Journal of Alpha123

[Benjamin]

Yes sounds like she does like you, the only suggestion is to take the lead more, instead of asking 'where do you want to sit' take her to where YOU want to sit and she will follow.



I don't usually reccommend first dates at a cinema or such, but it seems like it went okay.

Just spend time with her, talk some more, relax and take things forward physically, like grab her hand, put your arm around her. And one hint is if your dropping her off or leaving and she just seems to hang around like "umm" at the end and doesn't just go straight away, it means she wants you to kiss her!

Good luck.

-Ben

[Shannon]

Definitely lead more. You're the leader... not the follower. That's the role most women want to play.

[alpha123]

Thanks. I like her. She is very sexy and nice, and high class too. Yes, I will take the lead. In fact, she told me I could be a bit more aggressive. I looked at her, as though she meant towards her. Then she said, "No, no, not towards me, I mean at work". The same night we met a friend of her while walking, they talked a little, I forgot to introduce myself. Then suddenly I decided to look into her friends eyes. That must have been the subs. Her friend seemed happy with that.

The point with the dating site is that I have never really dared to do it. But now I do, and I want to try it. I just want to be able to say what I feel. I tried to capture some of what I felt on the date with the woman and summarized it in my profile as what I was looking for. Let's hope she does not find out. :-)

[alpha123]

I have started on Stage 2. Stage 1 went without any problems.

I have fixed another date with Lovely Long Legs. :-))

I female co-worker, who is also a very good friend, is helping me to write a profile that women will find attractive.

This is going to be a roller coaster. I am going to feel extremely well, but I am also going to feel really down. I am looking forward to it. I am finished with the steady curve of approaching depression, instead it shall be pleasure and pain!

I will do some meditation, in order to stay reasonably sane. :-)

I will focus on doing a good job at work.

[alpha123]

My difficult job situation is about to change. I have gotten a new job. I am really looking forward to this.

[AVB2011]

It is really tough to find the job now. Congratulations for your new job!

[alpha123]

Thank you. I am very happy about it. A big weight is about to be taken off my shoulders.

I am a couple of days into stage two of SM 2.0. I feel very tired. Perhaps also because I was out several hours with a search party looking for a girl that has gone missing in our community.

I am struggling a bit with online dating. In fact, I now think I will do better if I get to meet them in person. This is a new idea. A very good idea. It is a little difficult to write about myself, but I will probably get the hang of it.

[alpha123]

I have just been on a date with Long Legs. We went to a comedy show. I decided where to sit. It was quite good. Afterwards, we talked about relationships and stuff connected with emotions.

I am chatting online with another woman. She wanted me to send her more pictures, I said she could see me in person instead. Previously, I would have sent her the pictures without thinking, now I started to feel irritated. The one picture that was there, was good enough to see how I look. I am very happy with this response. Even if I showed a little irritation, she came back, wanting to continue the conversation. This is major stuff for me.

While doing SM I plan to talk to, and be in the company of, as many women as possible in order to let the subs do the work. Also, I hope to have sex with one or more of them at some point. This I am a little nervous about, I must admit. But sex or not, it doesn't matter, I am having a good time.

I am going to stop masturbating. Nothing wrong with doing it, but it is counter-productive in my plan to have sex with women.

Everything is going very well.

[alpha123]

I have a friend who is a natural seducer. He says he has always been like this. We are a little different, to say the least. The other day he confided in me, "Yesterday I went on an arranged bicycling tour. There I met a women. When we came back, we went on a nudist beach. Since there was nobody there, we had sex on the beach" "Great," I responded, although in my heart I felt I could never do this. The positive side is than he tells me this stuff, I guess he feels that I am on his side, which I am. Still, women are getting more interested in me, and this is definitely going somewhere.

[Shannon]

Comparing yourself to other people and their accomplishments is a waste of time. You are your own measuring stick. What someone else does is not of consequence for you. They are not you.

[alpha123]

Thanks. I will keep it in mind :-)

Yesterday I got compliments from several women. One nurse kept going on about my lean body. A female friend, who is extremely open, asked me if I was in love or have had sex, since I appeared very attractive to her. Surprisingly, I seem to take these compliments as a matter of fact. Previously, I would have felt awkward.

I feel comfortable doing SM 2.0. In fact, I would like things move even quicker.

[alpha123]

I know this macho Texan. Yesterday he said, "You should be careful with what you do with that light coming out of your eyes."

Another girl I have been flirting a little with suddenly took her two hands up in front of her, like she was a little puppet. I asked her to tell me what positive things had happened in her life lately, and she was stuttering.

It feels weird, but I like it!

I told my doctor I am looking for a woman. He said, "I imagine that should not be too difficult."

Today, I am taking a (male) priest I know out on a dinner and a movie. I need to talk a little bit about all this with him.

The important thing is to be around women and interact with them. It seems I don't care if their are young or old or thin or fat. It is their ability to interact that is of interest at the moment.

[alpha123]

I have been dreaming a couple of nights, about destruction and complications. Something is going on.

[alpha123]

I am going on a date with a second women. She seems really nice. I also have a good connection with a third one on a dating site. I want to date her too.

In a couple of instances the women has been given indirect sexual suggestions. I am a little unsure about what to do about it, it is probably best to give some indirect suggestions back in order to show them that they are attractive or just go on as normal.

I will remember to take the lead, suggest the place, choose the seat. Be decisive about what to order. Often, I catch myself thinking about what they are thinking about me. This is undermining my goal. I want to stop that.

All in all, everything is going very well. I am making progress, and that is what is important.