Stage 3, Day 28. Christmas holiday season, ugh.. What that means is that, yes people are out to get drunk and girls may even think hooking up more than usual, but... the better clubs are packed full of drunken people who are all trying that.
I'm gonna went for a bit, so feel free to pass this if you have stuff to do. I'm fine, just gotta set some priorities when going out.
As my 1st approach, I grabbed a very hot passing girl who was sober by the hand and pulled her to me. She was very confident and challenged me on anything I said that left something to interpretation, but she was just testing whether I was legit or some drunk who'd turn all supplicating beta the moment she questioned anything. She remained quite open, didn't leave, held solid eye contact up-close the whole time and after a while visibly decided that I was someone interesting and started laughing more, investing, introduced herself and so on. She was of course taken, but I enjoyed the chat and the chemistry. That's the sort of interaction I like (obviously more with single girls, but still). Lately I've been feeling fine just standing at whatever visible spot at the club by myself, moving to the music slightly and waiting if something interesting comes up. I was in observation mode a lot tonight, and what I saw was that every guy who managed to somehow "get with" a girl (pair up dancing, exchange numbers, talk about after parties) was acting quite beta and pleading the girls for their attention. Or at least that's what it looked like to me. And of course they're forced to do that; there's a horde of drunken guys around competing for the girl's attention, and the girls seldom select anything actively, so the guys must act that way to get the girl's attention and drag them along. But I just don't have any fucking interest to do that. I don't feel its something that a self-respecting man does. Its a lose-lose deal; the guys are forced to supplicate and the girls don't get to experience a stronger male presence. So what I end up doing is a lot of nothing, which of course isn't what I want either.
I feel like the advantages I have are confidence and sexuality when I'm actually with the girl one on one (sober or with only a little alc) and my intentions of being open, honest, loving and so forth. The solutions I see for myself are to:
(1) do more daygame or internet dating (ugh, texting and flakes...)
(2) avoid the larger clubs in the holiday seasons, or
(3) when in these really packed club situations, drop the normal connection stuff altogether and really go for a screening for dtf girls attitude. Aggressive, non-supplicating, high risk, high reward. But still kind of gentle, because I wouldn't enjoy it otherwise. I don't live in a very big city so I'm still a bit wary of doing that, but.. well. Actually I was already a lot more aggressive a month ago. I feel fine about it when I'm just going up like that "voluntarily", but I feel like a sorry little fan boy if I have to go and compete with 5 other guys who start trying to imitate me on the dance floor and shit (had a few tonight).
I'm gonna went for a bit, so feel free to pass this if you have stuff to do. I'm fine, just gotta set some priorities when going out.
As my 1st approach, I grabbed a very hot passing girl who was sober by the hand and pulled her to me. She was very confident and challenged me on anything I said that left something to interpretation, but she was just testing whether I was legit or some drunk who'd turn all supplicating beta the moment she questioned anything. She remained quite open, didn't leave, held solid eye contact up-close the whole time and after a while visibly decided that I was someone interesting and started laughing more, investing, introduced herself and so on. She was of course taken, but I enjoyed the chat and the chemistry. That's the sort of interaction I like (obviously more with single girls, but still). Lately I've been feeling fine just standing at whatever visible spot at the club by myself, moving to the music slightly and waiting if something interesting comes up. I was in observation mode a lot tonight, and what I saw was that every guy who managed to somehow "get with" a girl (pair up dancing, exchange numbers, talk about after parties) was acting quite beta and pleading the girls for their attention. Or at least that's what it looked like to me. And of course they're forced to do that; there's a horde of drunken guys around competing for the girl's attention, and the girls seldom select anything actively, so the guys must act that way to get the girl's attention and drag them along. But I just don't have any fucking interest to do that. I don't feel its something that a self-respecting man does. Its a lose-lose deal; the guys are forced to supplicate and the girls don't get to experience a stronger male presence. So what I end up doing is a lot of nothing, which of course isn't what I want either.
I feel like the advantages I have are confidence and sexuality when I'm actually with the girl one on one (sober or with only a little alc) and my intentions of being open, honest, loving and so forth. The solutions I see for myself are to:
(1) do more daygame or internet dating (ugh, texting and flakes...)
(2) avoid the larger clubs in the holiday seasons, or
(3) when in these really packed club situations, drop the normal connection stuff altogether and really go for a screening for dtf girls attitude. Aggressive, non-supplicating, high risk, high reward. But still kind of gentle, because I wouldn't enjoy it otherwise. I don't live in a very big city so I'm still a bit wary of doing that, but.. well. Actually I was already a lot more aggressive a month ago. I feel fine about it when I'm just going up like that "voluntarily", but I feel like a sorry little fan boy if I have to go and compete with 5 other guys who start trying to imitate me on the dance floor and shit (had a few tonight).
Thoughts, opinions and beliefs subject to change without prior notice.
