Stage 1, Day 25. Sub-titles rock, though nothing comes to mind here. "Drunken musing", let's say. Btw, its your journals, but just saying it is a bit challenging to know where you guys are going in your programs when you don't post the stage and day information ;)
Click tracks at work seem to be just what the doctor ordered. I feel this can actually increase the overall quality of my life considerably if if the indications from these last 2 days are to be believed.. I noticed I had gotten a bit chaotic in how I plan & prioritize what I do, just keeping everything in my head and to multitask. I feel a bit calmer now, and I started to again write out the 3 most important tasks for the day in the morning and check them out once they're done. Sarge - yeah, its got to do with how my manager manages finances and resources sometimes, I won't get into it. It is weird. And over soon, I hope.
I've had no sign of attraction during the week, but that's just because of circumstances. I'm going out proper tomorrow. I was also out briefly just now.. a girl texted my to come for a beer, and it turned out it was actually 2 couples, including her & her new bf, and another taken girl. Didn't know anyone but had 1 beer and got along great with everyone and flirted some with 2 of the girls without anyone minding, lol. Going out feels pretty great now, I get this endorphin rush just hanging around talking to girls. I don't know if this is NSFM (Shannon mentioned somewhere that it somehow imitates the feeling of having had a few drinks, "loosened up") or if its just me basking in my own sexual aura. The last 2 times having that first beer actually makes me feel weaker because I lose that feeling of control and sensitivity of my aura that I seem to have developed now. Or maybe substitute the word "aura" with "arousal", idk. But I do know it makes me feel good, like on extacy or something, and girls like to be around me while I enjoy it.
One thing I realized today: I thought I was relaxed before when I wasn't twichy and I was keeping myself pretty calm, actively relaxing my muscles. No, relaxed is when you don't have to think about being relaxed, its like you're on the playground wearing all dirty clothes and not caring about anything especially. It allows spontaneity for you and people to be relaxed around you. And I feel like my voice turns into this low rumble that could put a crying baby to sleep in seconds, lol.
Still working on getting to hang around more women during the day/week. My work sucks hard in this regard, but hopefully I'll have more energy for hobbies etc after some tapping @ work. I'm also going to work on getting more in touch with some of my friends and new people so that I can go out "in a normal way" more and less with my PU friends, where its almost like going out alone. And yes, going out completely alone still feels daunting to me.
Click tracks at work seem to be just what the doctor ordered. I feel this can actually increase the overall quality of my life considerably if if the indications from these last 2 days are to be believed.. I noticed I had gotten a bit chaotic in how I plan & prioritize what I do, just keeping everything in my head and to multitask. I feel a bit calmer now, and I started to again write out the 3 most important tasks for the day in the morning and check them out once they're done. Sarge - yeah, its got to do with how my manager manages finances and resources sometimes, I won't get into it. It is weird. And over soon, I hope.
I've had no sign of attraction during the week, but that's just because of circumstances. I'm going out proper tomorrow. I was also out briefly just now.. a girl texted my to come for a beer, and it turned out it was actually 2 couples, including her & her new bf, and another taken girl. Didn't know anyone but had 1 beer and got along great with everyone and flirted some with 2 of the girls without anyone minding, lol. Going out feels pretty great now, I get this endorphin rush just hanging around talking to girls. I don't know if this is NSFM (Shannon mentioned somewhere that it somehow imitates the feeling of having had a few drinks, "loosened up") or if its just me basking in my own sexual aura. The last 2 times having that first beer actually makes me feel weaker because I lose that feeling of control and sensitivity of my aura that I seem to have developed now. Or maybe substitute the word "aura" with "arousal", idk. But I do know it makes me feel good, like on extacy or something, and girls like to be around me while I enjoy it.
One thing I realized today: I thought I was relaxed before when I wasn't twichy and I was keeping myself pretty calm, actively relaxing my muscles. No, relaxed is when you don't have to think about being relaxed, its like you're on the playground wearing all dirty clothes and not caring about anything especially. It allows spontaneity for you and people to be relaxed around you. And I feel like my voice turns into this low rumble that could put a crying baby to sleep in seconds, lol.
Still working on getting to hang around more women during the day/week. My work sucks hard in this regard, but hopefully I'll have more energy for hobbies etc after some tapping @ work. I'm also going to work on getting more in touch with some of my friends and new people so that I can go out "in a normal way" more and less with my PU friends, where its almost like going out alone. And yes, going out completely alone still feels daunting to me.
Thoughts, opinions and beliefs subject to change without prior notice.
