09-11-2014, 09:44 AM
(09-11-2014, 07:39 AM)Natious Wrote: Day 24: So I've decided to quit alcohol for good. The feeling of this decision is powerful, normally I've tried cutting down and having just a certain amount, but these exceptions keep becoming a smaller deal and I end up back where I started.
It's going to be hard having social events (in the future) without a drop of alcohol, hopefully AM helps me with my social anxiety enough so I can make some immense progress with it. Although I have to admit that I don't go out at all at the moment and have no friends where I currently live, somehow I don't even care.
Been feeling insecure throughout pretty much the whole stage. I think I'm becoming more responsive instead of being reactive. Something I wouldn't have been able to identify before. Not yet totally sure about this, but I do think of expressing my opinion with less shame when I feel strong emotions toward a situation or when someone says something.
Emotions are more on surface then I'm used to, I have kept everything bottled up for a very long time and made an impression on people that I have no feelings, or don't care about anything. Sometimes when too many emotions start to surface I feel like I'm going crazy.
All of these things are rather positive than negative, but really hard to deal with for now. Thinking about how most people here are in a certain distance in their lives on this forums shows how deep in a rut I'm in. I know I have a longer way to go and I don't know how much action I'm willing to take, currently not much, I'd sit around and play or watch something. I am thinking of starting a workout routine though, which I've enjoyed a lot in the past.
I often go to pubs and order coffee. Used to feel embarrassed by it but now its kind of quirky and different.
