06-22-2020, 08:37 PM
Today I started actually working on what's been waiting for 10+ years for me to do. It's not so much making me nervous anymore as, I really don't know what I'm doing with this just yet. I feel frustrated because circumstances are making this unusually difficult to do, and I ended up throwing out my whole day's work because I realized it wasn't what was needed. But I'm doing it, no more hiding behind excuses or ignoring it.
Caught myself a couple of times today doing things in public that I normally wouldn't do. For example, while waiting for a host at the restaurant I went to for dinner, I was "dancing" with my girlfriend (if you can call it that). Didn't care who saw me. That's definitely not my normal.
The experience was very "still" for me emotionally today, fear-wise. I don't know how else to describe it; like the surface of a lake that is perfectly smooth and still. There just wasn't any. I am concerned with doing this new thing right from the get-go, but it's not fear. Fear was preventing me from doing it. Now I'm going to do it even though I have no idea where I'll find the time. And I'm going to do it because it's going to make a huge positive difference.
I am increasingly pleased and impressed. This program is going to have huge impact on my life in several directions, I can already tell. Very much looking forward to the changes and improvements this is resulting in, and will eventually to result in. Very surprised how smooth and easy this process has been so far. It shouldn't, this is what I designed it to do, but I've failed enough times with FRM to be skeptical of big changes. I'm going to let time show me what FRM 4.9 can actually do before getting my hopes up, but so far we are definitely on the intended track of making the process smooth, easy, simple, natural and comfortable compared to the previous version.
Caught myself a couple of times today doing things in public that I normally wouldn't do. For example, while waiting for a host at the restaurant I went to for dinner, I was "dancing" with my girlfriend (if you can call it that). Didn't care who saw me. That's definitely not my normal.
The experience was very "still" for me emotionally today, fear-wise. I don't know how else to describe it; like the surface of a lake that is perfectly smooth and still. There just wasn't any. I am concerned with doing this new thing right from the get-go, but it's not fear. Fear was preventing me from doing it. Now I'm going to do it even though I have no idea where I'll find the time. And I'm going to do it because it's going to make a huge positive difference.
I am increasingly pleased and impressed. This program is going to have huge impact on my life in several directions, I can already tell. Very much looking forward to the changes and improvements this is resulting in, and will eventually to result in. Very surprised how smooth and easy this process has been so far. It shouldn't, this is what I designed it to do, but I've failed enough times with FRM to be skeptical of big changes. I'm going to let time show me what FRM 4.9 can actually do before getting my hopes up, but so far we are definitely on the intended track of making the process smooth, easy, simple, natural and comfortable compared to the previous version.
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
