Transcendent Sith Lord's DMSI 3.3 D Journal

[DarthXedonias]

Thanks guys. Yeah, I kinda of knew I had resentment but I didn't know I had this much along with these other things that I'm uncovering. Its seems like Version A is peeling back the layers and I'm finding more and more reasons as to why I'm resisting so much.

In other news I leave for work in a few hours but I do have a minor update. I do think that what my co-worker did really did do a number on the relationship between me and this girl. I'm thinking the celebrity affect, without the sexual affect, probably got her to start leaning towards a intimate relationship (whether it be FWB or long term) but once he did that, without the more sexual aspects of the aura in play, it kinda of killed of what little sexual attraction there was. I got 3 text in a row from her asking something of me. Basically there is a guy at my job that I know who needed someone to switch shifts with because of a doctors appointment. He has a female friend ,who I also talk to, who then asked the girl i'm "slightly" interested in if she would text me to see if I could do it.

The reason this annoyed me is because by this time she hadn't initiated a text with me in about 2 weeks. So basically out of the blue she texts me asking for something which in general annoys me. I'm assuming the lack of initiation is back to what my co worker did. When we first hanged out at my house, about 3 months ago, she kinda remained a respectful distance from me. The second time though she became more mirthful and touchy feely. After the second meet up that's when she first started really initiating texting with me. Some time between the second and third meeting is when I think my co-worker decided to stick his nose in where it didn't belong because I noticed at the third meeting she was distant again not to mention on her phone (more on that later).

Unfortunately, it would seem it wasn't only my co-worker who was trying to cockblock me. One of her friends did so to. The back story is that she really liked this guy and they were friends. He liked her as well but he went off to Japan for a while. When he came back he admitted he had feelings for her but he realized while he was in Japan that he was gay. So they just remained friends. The Wednesday we were thinking about hanging out she wasn't sure if her friend had anything planned for her that day (since he might only be here for a while) so we waited until that Tuesday to confirm. He confirmed that he didn't have anything planned with her on Tuesday night so we were free to hang out that Wednesday. She gets to my place and I noticed while we are watching movies she takes out her phone a lot. I think the guy from the previous night still has feelings for her and realized "who" she might be hanging out with. Apparently he after the previous night of saying he didn't have anything planned the next day, he starts blowing up her phone trying to convince her to meet him at the mall later -_-'.

For clarification, I was going to end it a little bit earlier than usual because I had work that day but not by much. But she ended it 2 hours and half earlier because she finally gave in after he kept blowing up her phone asking her to meet him. We haven't met up since. We had thought about meeting up again but I will admit after she gave in to that guy and cut our own meeting short my interest kinda of took a nose dive and then add on top of that my co-worker and this other "guy friend's" meddling, it doesn't seem like it might go anywhere. I'm still interested, maybe in a FWB because of the chemistry we have but more than that not really. I admit too, its not out of neediness that I might still want something to happen. I know there are more women out there than this but it feels like I want something to happen so that I can prove to myself that I can sleep with any chick I want. I've only gotten this added determination to prove this to myself since running the last couple of versions of DMSI.

Getting back to the text last night I'm going to just ignore it and if she brings it up I'm just going to point out: (1) It was late when I received it , (2) This guy could have easily talked to me himself when I saw him earlier in the day, and (3) I don't really appreciate it when people that rarely text me now to begin with, start texting me all of sudden asking for stuff or favors. I think that should get across to her that "Fine, you want to distanced yourself because you think people are talking about us, but don't think I'm going to be your orbiter and start doing you favors".

Comments and Suggestions are highly appreciated.