And today I feel terrible. Tired of the world, myself, and everything in these two things. Thoughts of running away from the sub. Getting strong pangs of resentment towards women in general; that is very much unlike me! Also resentment towards myself for having wasted so many opportunities in my life. Ahh, it is so tiresome.
I'll think I'll stick to it nevertheless. Be it the gambler's fallacy, my usual obtuseness or actual will, I know not.
I think I'll do more loops today, don't know how many. I want this to break through.
EDIT
And now I'm all out crying. Jeebus.
EDIT II
Feeling slightly better now. Consciously, I do not really know what this is all about. This something deep in the subconscious, I think. Something seems to be playing out. Wish I had some guidance in all this.
And today I feel very, very good, and have the feeling (and evidence + more than one coincidence) that things are starting to take off in the right direction yet again. Heh.
Yup, it does seem that ver. B is going to give faster, better results for resistant types, but it really depends on whether you can actually withstand the psycho-emotional side effects of your subconscious reacting to and trying to execute the script. It seems to be hitting directly and taking no prisoners, so to speak. I am pretty pleased with myself that I am able to take it and roll with the script. Actually kinda proud of the various layers of my subconscious of being willing to accept changes in beliefs despite all kinds of fears or misgivings they might be having.
EDIT
Added a signature to my posts here. Just chanced into this quotation and it's really resonated with me.
Crap, I overslept today and we had to cancel one of our touring shows because of that. Nothing earth-shattering (we still played 4), but unpleasant, stressful and unprofessional. I missed the alarm completely, and I am getting slight indications that my subconscious is complaining of overload. Otherwise, feeling great. So this might be either actual overload or maybe some sort of devious self-sabotage, as things are going really good. Anyway, I might have to cut down on the number of loops until Friday (I was thinking 4), because this cannot happen again; it's a general no-no in showbiz.
So I went back home today early, even though I am in general driven to keep working and/or interact with various females (I often chance into or am contacted by) throughout the afternoon, to maybe try and fit in 7 loops today simply by starting to listen earlier, so that I don't oversleep again.
If I decide that I unfortunately have to cut down to 4 loops, I'll be back to 7 ASAP, maybe doing 9 once or twice a week.
Huh. So the touring shows today and tomorrow got cancelled because the pianist is out due to personal reasons and we didn't have backup. We shall see about Friday.
On one hand, I can rest a bit. On the other hand, I wanted to use the money to finally purchase either MLS or UD.
C'est la vie. Oh well. I'll use to the time to listen to high-dosage DMSI and work on other stuff. DMSI keeps feeling increasingly good; the elated, morphin-drip sensation is with me pretty much all the time (unless I'm 100% focused on something else that requires a lot of brainpower, f. in. singing), and I literally cannot wait to put on my loops for the day.
Today was quiet on the female front, as stuff interfered. One girl did send me a message saying "careful or I'll fall in love with you <3" after I sent her birthday wishes, though. Also, the ex keeps sending me info on various cute young girls she's gotten to know lately, and offered to invite me to some parties that they will be probably attending. That's a very interesting result. Oh yes, the ex herself still wants me and we meet from time to time (as she keeps inviting me to come over), with various levels of physical intimacy during those meetings, so to speak.
(09-17-2017, 09:18 AM)Have at ye Wrote: [ -> ]And today I feel terrible. Tired of the world, myself, and everything in these two things. Thoughts of running away from the sub. Getting strong pangs of resentment towards women in general; that is very much unlike me! Also resentment towards myself for having wasted so many opportunities in my life. Ahh, it is so tiresome.
I'll think I'll stick to it nevertheless. Be it the gambler's fallacy, my usual obtuseness or actual will, I know not.
I think I'll do more loops today, don't know how many. I want this to break through.
EDIT
And now I'm all out crying. Jeebus.
EDIT II
Feeling slightly better now. Consciously, I do not really know what this is all about. This something deep in the subconscious, I think. Something seems to be playing out. Wish I had some guidance in all this.
Stay strong my man, this too shall pass in no time and continue to trust the process
(09-20-2017, 09:52 AM)Sanbosay Wrote: [ -> ] (09-17-2017, 09:18 AM)Have at ye Wrote: [ -> ]And today I feel terrible. Tired of the world, myself, and everything in these two things. Thoughts of running away from the sub. Getting strong pangs of resentment towards women in general; that is very much unlike me! Also resentment towards myself for having wasted so many opportunities in my life. Ahh, it is so tiresome.
I'll think I'll stick to it nevertheless. Be it the gambler's fallacy, my usual obtuseness or actual will, I know not.
I think I'll do more loops today, don't know how many. I want this to break through.
EDIT
And now I'm all out crying. Jeebus.
EDIT II
Feeling slightly better now. Consciously, I do not really know what this is all about. This something deep in the subconscious, I think. Something seems to be playing out. Wish I had some guidance in all this.
Stay strong my man, this too shall pass in no time and continue to trust the process
Thanks! It sure did.
There's still some negative emotions/fears popping up every now and again, but they are manageable. I'm sticking to DMSI ver. B at least up until 10th November.
Who am I kidding, I'm probably sticking to DMSI until the next version is out. Then I'm switching to its ver. A for 3 months, and then I may start switching the glorious 5.5g subs every 3 months.
(09-20-2017, 09:57 AM)Have at ye Wrote: [ -> ] (09-20-2017, 09:52 AM)Sanbosay Wrote: [ -> ] (09-17-2017, 09:18 AM)Have at ye Wrote: [ -> ]And today I feel terrible. Tired of the world, myself, and everything in these two things. Thoughts of running away from the sub. Getting strong pangs of resentment towards women in general; that is very much unlike me! Also resentment towards myself for having wasted so many opportunities in my life. Ahh, it is so tiresome.
I'll think I'll stick to it nevertheless. Be it the gambler's fallacy, my usual obtuseness or actual will, I know not.
I think I'll do more loops today, don't know how many. I want this to break through.
EDIT
And now I'm all out crying. Jeebus.
EDIT II
Feeling slightly better now. Consciously, I do not really know what this is all about. This something deep in the subconscious, I think. Something seems to be playing out. Wish I had some guidance in all this.
Stay strong my man, this too shall pass in no time and continue to trust the process
Thanks! It sure did. There's still some negative emotions/fears popping up every now and again, but they are manageable. I'm sticking to DMSI ver. B at least up until 10th November.
Who am I kidding, I'm probably sticking to DMSI until the next version is out. Then I'm switching to its ver. A for 3 months, and then I may start switching the glorious 5.5g subs every 3 months.
lol I hear man, sounds like you are doing excellent on B.. I am still on A. I plan to run A for a month and B for a month then switch back to A for another month like each ver for a month for 6 months
(09-20-2017, 09:57 AM)Have at ye Wrote: [ -> ] (09-20-2017, 09:52 AM)Sanbosay Wrote: [ -> ] (09-17-2017, 09:18 AM)Have at ye Wrote: [ -> ]And today I feel terrible. Tired of the world, myself, and everything in these two things. Thoughts of running away from the sub. Getting strong pangs of resentment towards women in general; that is very much unlike me! Also resentment towards myself for having wasted so many opportunities in my life. Ahh, it is so tiresome.
I'll think I'll stick to it nevertheless. Be it the gambler's fallacy, my usual obtuseness or actual will, I know not.
I think I'll do more loops today, don't know how many. I want this to break through.
EDIT
And now I'm all out crying. Jeebus.
EDIT II
Feeling slightly better now. Consciously, I do not really know what this is all about. This something deep in the subconscious, I think. Something seems to be playing out. Wish I had some guidance in all this.
Stay strong my man, this too shall pass in no time and continue to trust the process
Thanks! It sure did. There's still some negative emotions/fears popping up every now and again, but they are manageable. I'm sticking to DMSI ver. B at least up until 10th November.
Who am I kidding, I'm probably sticking to DMSI until the next version is out. Then I'm switching to its ver. A for 3 months, and then I may start switching the glorious 5.5g subs every 3 months.
lol I hear man, sounds like you are doing excellent on B.. I am still on A. I plan to run A for a month and B for a month then switch back to A for another month like each ver for a month for 6 months
Yeah, I've mostly been doing ver. A up until this point, B was too much to handle emotionally for me. But it's working much faster than A; pure anti-resistance/anti-self-sabotage scripting works better for my personality type, I guess.
I will probably do a month of ver. A in either November or December, and see how that pans out.
(09-20-2017, 10:07 AM)Have at ye Wrote: [ -> ]Yeah, I've mostly been doing ver. A up until this point, B was too much to handle emotionally for me. But it's working much faster than A; pure anti-resistance/anti-self-sabotage scripting works better for my personality type, I guess.
I will probably do a month of ver. A in either November or December, and see how that pans out.
Sweet! See for me I still get results (laid) on ver A like every weekend when I go out just on A. I can only imagine what B would do with all your results I am tempted to start B on Friday
Well, I'm not getting laid like crazy yet, but when I do it does happen like the product description page says
and I do get tons of other effects, like the ones mentioned above, which seem to indicate I'm going in the right direction.
With your results (I did read your journal
) B might be crazy. I do remember getting "cold feet" after about a month of ver. A back when ver. 3.1 was released when things started gaining true momentum, and basically spent the entire summer fighting that fear-based reaction. So do not worry if you'd rather stick it out with ver. A.
I'm one of the more resistant guys around here with quite a bit of emotional baggage which had to be unloaded.