Subliminal Talk

(05-11-2016, 09:46 PM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]F*ck I remember that used to happen to me all the time. It's definitely a butt display, because, she could easily have gone somewhere else to workout. In fact, if she saw you as some creepy guy, she would have AVOIDED even HINTING at such behavior. Keep that in mind.

Great point.

(05-11-2016, 09:46 PM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]As for PE, try priligy. Good Looking Loser swears by it. And for getting a bigger "package", use the bathmat. I haven't used it as consitant as I should, but it's given me 1/2 in the years I've had it. Prolly would be more if I could get consistant as well.

I do own a bathmate (x30 xtreme) and love it. Gives you both short and long term results and feels more substantial than anything else I've tried.

I've been on GLL since before sub talk. My username there is Dubls and that's why I changed it here to match. I've read the PE article and the Priligy review. My problem with it is that I hate the idea of having to rely on a drug in order to perform respectably. And I hate the idea of acknowledging that I can't conquer this without medication.

(05-12-2016, 03:11 PM)yeah! Wrote: [ -> ]Afformations (different to affirmations) and visualisation.

If it happens in the mind, the body will find ways to follow.

DM me some info?

It's rough man, having this shit going on. I get into this thought pattern and then I begin to question why I've even invested in my image. Sometimes I feel like a walking sham. Good looking, well dressed, but when the pants come off there's only disappointment.

It dawned on me the other day that I am the Good Looking Loser. I'm exactly where Chris of GLL was before he got the idea to start the site.

Oh there's resistance for sure. Dzemoo wasn't kidding about Stage 3. I mean my circumstances haven't changed between Stage 2 and 3, just how I feel about them. Objectively, they suck, regardless of how easy it is to swallow that pill on any given day. I guess the positive is that it's harder to ignore these things when you feel like shit.

Fell asleep early last night. Woke up super early feeling super horny so I busted 2 nuts, which is 1 more than usual. Went back to bed. Woke up still horny! FYI my sex drive hasn't been very high over the past few days. There's nothing like sexual energy. It drives you like nothing else. I felt so sexual at work, and I was confident. A co worker of mine whom I have chemistry with really turned me on. I wanted to grab her by the crotch, pull her in, and have my way with her. Obviously I didn't. This program is whack. I had the sense that women were picking up on my vibe today.

Oh and what's interesting about all of this is that it occured despite having 0 hours of exposure on thursday, and 4 last night. Looking at at least 2 make-up days.

After a session of heavy lifting I am noticeably more irritable and aggressive. Sex drive also spikes. T surge?

Side note: I love how dominant and sexual I feel after a workout. I want to feel like that most of the time. I'm not going to start injecting myself with T so what can I do?

The way I feel post workout is probably a fraction of how Dzemoo feels on roids. It's a state of being that makes me feel alive. My day to day state by comparison feels drabby and watered down.

I'm cutting but not aggressively because I want it to be sustainable. 3/4 of a pound per week. I wonder how much my T and my mood would spike if I was at maintenance calories or slow bulking with a small surplus.

Still at it.

(05-16-2016, 03:36 PM)Dubls Wrote: [ -> ]After a session of heavy lifting I am noticeably more irritable and aggressive. Sex drive also spikes. T surge?

Side note: I love how dominant and sexual I feel after a workout. I want to feel like that most of the time. I'm not going to start injecting myself with T so what can I do?

The way I feel post workout is probably a fraction of how Dzemoo feels on roids. It's a state of being that makes me feel alive. My day to day state by comparison feels drabby and watered down.

I'm cutting but not aggressively because I want it to be sustainable. 3/4 of a pound per week. I wonder how much my T and my mood would spike if I was at maintenance calories or slow bulking with a small surplus.

Thats why i dont wont to stop roids, its addictive

Well my 20s are coming to an end and I was thinking about HRT not because I need it—my T levels are mid range—but because the idea of having high T all the time is attractive. But to say that's a serious commitment is an understatement.

I did 3-5g of maca for 2 months straight and I did not notice any difference. Now to be fair I was feeling rundown (mood, energy, sex drive) from cutting. I hoped maca would offset the drop in libido. Eventually I adjusted my caloric deficit and lowered training volume and that's around when I stopped taking it. You'd think maca would have shined under the circumstances that I took it, unless it works synergistically with libido, as opposed to standing on its own and having a cumulative effect.

I'm feel like I'm plateauing at life these days. I'm bored at my job, I'm bored with my gym routine, and I haven't had sex in five years.

I'll go through them in order.

I told myself that this would be the last job working for somebody else. It's a good place to work but I'm unfulfilled. I have contemplated leaving and going all in on a business of my own with no other source of income to fall back on. Now would be a good time: expenses are low and commitments are few. I'm disappointed in myself for having to make it an all or nothing scenario though.

I need to change it up at the gym. I'm thinking about Wendler 5/3/1. I think I should go to maintenance calories for a while and get my hormones back on track. Maybe even enjoy some strength gains.

Last point is something I haven't really given much thought. I've used the term begrudgingly celibate before. What kind of toll has it taken on my mind/mood/body to go five years without sex? Five years without any female companionship. I don't know, because this is my norm. What I do know is that I'm actively resisting what I am built to do and it's unnatural. It really hit me today. It's like a blanket on top of my entire being, and I wonder if my life has been a series of muted colours all this time. Now when I did have a sex life with the one woman I've been with, I remember dealing with shame about my body—this is long before I got in shape—and that exacerbated my poor performance. Yet I was getting that primal action; the kind I've been ignoring with my brain for most of my adult life. You already know what's holding me back, and I struggle to build the kind of momentum that I need to actually do something about it. The only explanation I have is that this reality is so strong because it's familiar, and changing it seems so farfetched, that I can't invest myself in changing it - because of doubt, and possibly fear.

PS Walked into a store the other day and at least three of the hot girls that work there looked me up and down like a strip of bacon.

Well shit Dzemoo wasn't kidding about Stage 3.

I've been down every day since my last post. Not all day long, but it's rough. Thinking about the same things I wrote about last, and questioning my commitment to diet and exercise. I started out with a vision to transform my body so I could look my best and feel good about myself. I made progress on both fronts but it feels like I emerged from one shell and walked into another. I've become the Good Looking Loser. Not to advertise, but his whole thing was that he was that he lived at the gym but there was no return on the looks that he worked so hard for. He had no skills and very little experience with women. Much of this lifestyle—if you want to call it that—is described in an article called The Plight of the Lonesome Bodybuilder. I'm not that hardcore, but I can relate. I'm spinning my wheels, and for what? I hit the gym 3 times a week and I work hard enough that I feel sore and drained on my off days. I'm so disciplined about my diet (counting, planning, etc.) that I actually turn down social outings because I'll ruin my calories or macros for that day. Or I won't get enough sleep and have a bad workout the next day. Or I won't get enough hours of SM3.

I also avoid going out at times because I know there will be opportunities with women and since I'm not willing to capitalize on them I'll just end up feeing angry/frustrated/depressed about giving into my own inhibitions. I have this default mindset of being completely closed off to relations with women beyond friendly banter. And the people around me wonder if I've dated anybody in the time that they've known me.

I suppose I should acknowledge the progress I've made. Whatever problems I think I have now, it wasn't too long ago that my body was among them. I'm not done with my body, but I don't feel horrible about it anymore. Of course my penis is excluded from this conversation. But the problems I do have now are actually exacerbated by the fact that I'm fit and good looking—because I have to acknowledge them more often and more intensely.

Odd that I'm being hit like this so late in the stage. Used to being effected in the first two weeks.

And for anybody that wants to reply with, "Stop fucking complaining and do something, or keep your mouth shut." I've already told myself that.

Being a good looking loser is better than an ugly looking loser, just sayin.

I think what you're lacking is a clear mission. Trust me, I've been there. And I mean, I've really been there. Had no direction at all, confused since birth about who I was and my place in the world. I went completely off the rails in college and burnt out. I was out to prove something, but all I met was resitance and hate. That pushed me into a deep despression, the Great Depression. I didn't talk to anybody for 6 months, locked inside my room eating crap and watching movies. Then I started reading, and gradually found my calling. My purpose in this world is to filter all the bs in society, shake it up like a halway decent Martini and toss the intoxicating liqiuds back at the world.

Since realizing this, everything I do comes back to this. It's been 2 and a half years since I got out the personal hell. Hitting on chicks is a creative and scientific endevour, not just pleasure. They go hand in hand for me. I currently have over 50 000 dollars to my name after working harder than a bloodhorse. I only seek 3 things out of life, making a living as an artist, be mentally and physically strong like the Hulk and get laid. That's it.

When I wake up in the morning, I can't wait to hit the gym. I work out every day and go as hard as possible every fucking time. I work full time in a physically demanding job, I mean sometimes I have to load long-ass steel pipes weighing 60kgs into a container all by myself, and that's a couple of hours after doing heavy deads and squats. Don't care, I don't stop for anything or anybody. Even at 60 years old, I'm gonna be pimp. The young guns in the future better watch out, I will snatch your 20 year old hot girlfriend while you watch in utter disbelief. Every guy could get laid, there are no excuses. You simply stick your dick into her and what happens next is outside of your control anyway. Sometimes it won't be good for you, her or her curious cousin. That's just the way it is, it's a quest to figure out what works for you.

So what I'm saying is that it was necessary for me to go through that stage, rock bottom. I had to completely self destruct before rising from the ashes reborn, transformed and DRIVEN. Just know that I relate to everything your saying here.

Not to sound negative but I don't understand why you guys are so into body training. I used to be fu**g crazy about it before but as soon as I realized that the body isn't the most important, far from it otherwise I would have get laid easily when I was 16. Then when I realized that, body training became just a nice hobby that I practice only from time to time just to keep the minimum requirement. And this is just laziness on my part here because it seems you can get attractive with the bare minimum body when you are a man, I should have been born a woman

So this is me asking why you are so crazy about body training? I don't understand coming from that scene when I was young, I used to be almost as muscular as Arnold, my friend used to call Arnold. But now well I'm procrastinating on bodybuilding, I still have a good decent body though. Where do you get the motivation?

Sidenote: Stage 3 sucks.