Subliminal Talk

lol if that were the case blueness im in trouble because i have the grim reaper tattooed onto my arm. I actually see it not as a sign of bad things or death but as a reminder that he can come at anytime and to live life to the fullest. Something i did when i first started changing my mindset for me not to fall into how i was in high school.

its been a week and one day into stage 3... not sure but i feel different like i could care less about anything or anyone...

i was supposed to go drinking with a friend this weekend before i left for Denver (which i leave next Sunday) i told him ill have a drink just 1 because i need to save my money for my trip. He went into full on D*** mode and told me off saying i was using it as an excuse i told him off saying ill say what ever they hell i want to say so as for him to know im not getting drunk and wasting money if he wants to hang to stop trying to be my parent. I know he is mad at me because when Saturday came i didn't pick up his calls or text and i refused to hang out with some one who dose not treat me with respect.

I must be on a down swing because i keep feeling negativity and resistance. but i know when im on the upswing it will be great again.

time for another update: prepare wall of text :p

stage three has been different to the other 2 because its the first big gun to the alpha set. I have been speaking my mind more lately or not saying much. I had two dreams i remembered one about me with a woman i don't know and the other winning some money in the lottery. Mood swings seem to fluctuate from happy to not caring about anything or anyone mixed with uncertainty i suppose. I think i have discovered what is causing my resistance My reluctance to grow up and be a man not a man child im only 22 but i have no license but i have a car and a permit, live with my mom and step dad, and have tried not to do much to actually grow up and be self sufficient. Now to take the actual steps since i feel more confident

the girl who cut her fingers was back at work and we had our Xmas party in Wednesday and all day she kept checking me out. even more so during the party and she asked me what cologne i wear. I smirked a little and with a laugh said Axe chocolate. She had a big smile on her face and said o because it smells great. (funny thing is almost every girl i have seen or known says the chocolate smell is the best) I had talked to her a bit more with some slight flirtation and a lot of eye contact

Tomorrow i begin my trip to Denver for Xmas. So im doing a lot of new things like taking a train to Portland then flying out. I have flown tons of times before but i have never taken a train anywhere across the state or nation and have never been on a public bus or light rail... Good thing my sister lives there or id be slightly lost... Hopefully i can find better earphones for my zune so i can listen to stage three more then a few hours a night...since i probably wont be in a room to myself and don't want to expose anyone else.

You're experiencing the same thing I am. I'm almost done with Stage 3 and the mood changes from happy to simple indifference is typical. It's good though, because I'd rather be indifferent than sad. I actually believe this is the main goal of the Alpha Set, to make you more indifferent to the outside world and become more happy just by being yourself.

Also Woceyes, how do you think the Flirting sub has helped aid you so far?

I'm only 1 day into stage 3 but I get what you are saying. I've been experienceing some indifference the past week because I had an extra two weeks added to stage 2 and things started cementing in my head and now I started stage three yesterday. I woke up like a zombie and for a little while I began to doubt myself and became uncertain about things but then I said "whatever. it doesnt matter". I felt very indifferent all day.. more talkative and just at ease pretty much. I was able to let go but I wouldn't say I was overly happy or smiley. I def. didn't procrasitnate today either like i did earlier.. I'm feeling proactive so hopefully this continues. I hope for the best for you Woceyes and I hope you enjoy stage 4! have fun on your trip man!

its been hard trying to listen to stage three off my laptop earplugs wont stay in...

some times it feels like its not working anymore but the funny thing is for my trip here to Denver i have rode a train,took a shuttle,rode a light rail,rode a bus,flew in 2 airplanes and had one hot chick who looks like Olivia Wilde sit next to me and trying so hard to get my attention. all except the airplanes i have never done especially by my self. She was the first woman to approach me with me doing nothing i didn't even look at her and there were plenty of seats for her to sit down. So i know its still working and Heck i didn't even feel any social anxiety or nervousness doing any of the above i felt so comfortable in my own skin people.

I guess i should finally tell you guys the one girl that is my moms best friends daughter. well i decided to ask her out and things are going well pushed myself out of my comfort zone with her and im actually improving

Yay! I pushed myself out of my comfort zone a little today. feels good doesn't it

yeah it dose feel good

im not gonna lie i have never really done much when it comes to relationships,women and everything that leads up to a relationship and keeping one. All i know is i have pushed myself out and continue to do so. Not just women but anything im more crass in how i say stuff, my humor has grown tremendously even with self deprecating humor which i had pointed out the other day i was doing it and made a joke off of it. I just dont really care but at the same time i feel needy on a lot of stuff and i still feel a tad bit of the nice guy syndrome pleasing people but instead of everyone i seem to be targeting certain people a step in the right direction i suppose?

I've gotten a lot of response to chocolate as well

(12-17-2010, 08:10 PM)K-Train Wrote: [ -> ]Also Woceyes, how do you think the Flirting sub has helped aid you so far?

sorry K Train i would say yes the flirt sub has helped tremendously with how i interact with Women i tease on almost everything they do or say but not to the point of them getting angry or upset. Alpha has made it more powerful with a quick wit thrown in. I can always get a smile for my jokes weather there good or just plain dumb. Its not just the teasing, my eye contact is stronger and the energy i give off seems different as well during my interactions and i can almost always feel when a woman wants me to talk or interact with them its strange but awesome at the same time.

hmm ok guys i had been dating my moms friends daughter for 2 months and this past week has been hell she was a total B**** to me and i got mad an stood up for my self and it seems her mom was trying to start shit between us by making sh** up about me which ended up swaying her to be pissed at me. One thing led to anouther and i ended up getting angry for the disrespect she showed me and asked her things like " if you didnt want to do this anymore just say something dont lead me on and beat around the bush" and found out whatever her problem seemed to be. After i asked her " if she wanted to anymore and she said i dont know im confused" i go "stop with this bs and stop wasting my time" and she gave anouther vague answer to which i responded with changing my relationship status back to single and she said can we talk about this later tonight if you even will or feel like it because you already changed your status i said you didnt even have our relationship anywhere on face book so whats the difference....

Alpha is definitely working in the past i would not have even said anything and continue to wonder why she was acting strange. I got tired of how she was treating me this week. I knew i should of just did what i said and not get into any relationship till i was ready....she did say i acted like i wasn't there and didn't care about her or her family and how i seemed to be distant or aloof.. i just wasn't like her exes being all needy and creepy...

yeah im amazed as well like i said i usually would have not done so and been all nervous but i was angry and blurted it all out to make sure she understands...

yeah it would be funny if we all did have a "connection" and it will be interesting when we all finish alpha to see our results and compare how each other has improved. I feel stronger as a man already and ill be done with stage 3 on the 5th can't wait.

well we talked and have agreed to be friends.. she said that she just dose not feel a connection to me anymore like a shift... I feel bummed out but not entirely i really did like her.

Well at least i can continue focusing on my alpha training at 100% focus rather then what i was giving to her and alpha.

Its also almost time for me to leave Colorado and head back to Oregon its been a fun two weeks with my family and an experience with my ex girl...Alpha is making me want to return back to Colorado and finally come home. I decided i will move back

(12-24-2010, 11:12 PM)woceyes Wrote: [ -> ]sorry K Train i would say yes the flirt sub has helped tremendously with how i interact with Women i tease on almost everything they do or say but not to the point of them getting angry or upset.

I enjoy the fact that when you are a strong man who has his options with women, you can get away with A LOT of shit around women. And I mean A LOT

(12-29-2010, 07:20 PM)Blueness Wrote: [ -> ]I wonder if we all met each other in real life, if we would all have a ''connection'' LOL

I can already tell we do, via the forums. I have a natural friend and I would say out of all the people I know, I have the strongest connection with him. There is even flirting going on and no we are not gay ;P