Spiral's Sex Magnet 2011 journal

[Spiral]

That's good to hear you guys. Thank you.

Lately things have been going fine this week. Work is fun.. been alot of playful banter from me and the girls and I'm actually just enjoying a woman's present more. I have no need for any thing sexual.. but all the banter and looks are sexual haha. I def. don't expect anything to come of it because they are married. Well... 2 of them anyways. I'm not only flirting with the girls but I flirt with the guys. But I guess you don't call that flirting if it's with the dudes.. it's just all around playful banter. Plus I havn't been stressed in the work environment this week so that's always good.

However, my parents are in town and my mom is mainly helping me deal with a doctor. Well, that already happened and they'll stay in town for the MRI but my parents have a tendency to always bring me down.. because I guess they know how to dig deep and get some issues out of me that need to be taken care of. They came up with some great ideas for me the other day to go out and meet people and I just remembered that I havn't been going out on my own and I know I have to. Also they just say you need to keep asking questions of new people you meet to find out what they do and find out any commonalities. During that conversation I realized I'm still uninterested in genuinely meeting people because of my preconceived notions of them either being stuck up or stupid douche bags. Basically none of that matters anyways and I am obviously doing better dealing with that if I'm more comfortable around everyone. It's easy to start up random conversations for me out of the blue.. even with new people as I experienced this past weekend. Anyways.. I'm still learning and dealing with issues.. Everything will be fine though.

[The GK]

Hi Spiral,
MRI? All good?

[Spiral]

No worries, GK. I'll be alright.

While it's on my mind.. today I was feeling very dominant unlike the rest of the week and last week. However prior to today I was very upbeat and I mellowed out alot today. I had an episode of almost breaking down but I could control it so easily. I was just questioning everything as usual during resistance. also throughout stage 6 my neediness has been lingering and fluctuates each day. I hope by the end of stage 6 I'll feel more motivated as I have been as well as not needy at all but ready to push forward and hang out with new people, hot girls, and be the @#$^&! man.

[Spiral]

Been having some negative talk today but I still pushed myself to go out for a bit this evening. turns out I was only gone for 1.5 hours. I went out to a bar.. chilled then hung out at a smaller club/bar venu which was a change of scenery from the bigger clubs in town. Either way... I never felt the night.. like I never got into it.

Either way.. Im not in Savannah right now so I assume when I was with friends 2 weekends ago and talking to new girls I was feeding off of their good and familiar energy. I've been having trouble re igniting that charisma and motivation I saw in myself back in Savannah. It seems to have something to do with my resistance which has been a lot of negative thinking but I really feel like I do not believe I can be independent and do things myself to create the best life possible for me ( EDIT: in this moment ). Back in savannah I was hanging with friends and dancing in the clubs... back home where I am now I can just stand.. manage a couple of smirks and gazes and some women but mostly just negative self talk that keeps building like.. "everyone's looking at me and wondering why I'm not talking to anybody." again it's heavy resistance with the limiting thoughts but I didn't think this would come back so bad to where I can't believe in myself to push through stupid stuff and be comfortable with my surroundings and just all around be a friendly guy. I think it's a good choice to do disconnect with negativity for now I cannot wait to start it. Also I will run OAA with it.. for hopefully a good solid 2 months with little to no gaps in between. Then on to alpha male. I'm ready for more boosts of motivation, focus, and optimism.

[Spiral]

Went to the buffalo wild wings we have in town yesterday for lunch because I was out and so hungry. It was good though because I got some fish tacos which is great for the kind of diet I'm switching over too. Not that I wasn't eating healthy before but now I need to eat more fish. Much more.

They were delicious.. especially the great connection I had with the bartenderess. I wanted to see what she was doing later then I was going to tell her my plans.. but I chickened out. I had this huge manly dude sitting next to me 2 seats over. and then a couple to the left of me two seats over. Which is no excuse. They can think what they want to think.. no one's out to get me of course! -_-;

Once again... I piss myself off because I didn't man up and do what she wanted me to do because our interaction went so well. None the less.. she told me as she handed me the check "Come back and see me again" and waved good bye to me when I left. This is a sure sign that she wants me to come back. I've gotten this from other women in various places. When women wave at you that's a good sign. I've known this.. now just need to capitalize on it. Now this won't be another case of the one itis but I'll def. go back around lunch time when the place isn't so loud in a week or two and hope she's working again. Build more of a connection then try to arrange a get together once she gets off work. I've noticed this girl working at the place before and we always look at each other. Now it was even better because she my server so from there it was perfect timing. Her personality is pretty cool too. Very good at flirting.. probably better than me

[Shannon]

One thing it's important to learn how to do is to tell when a woman in a service industry is flirting with you just to make a better tip or have you come back again. Not saying that's what's happening, but it's important to know about and be able to detect.

[Spiral]

This is true. But I can tell.

[Shannon]

This is true. But I can tell.

Good.

[Spiral]

This is how I can tell. I don't doubt the connection.

I used to but sex magnet has improved things like these and my senses overall when it comes to women. Now just gotta push through some fears, stay motivated, and live the life I was meant to live.

[Shannon]

I used to have a coin that had a Latin phrase on it, and I don't remember the Latin exactly, but I think it was "In tempus, omnibus" or something close to that... whatever it was, the translation was: "All things in their own time." You will get there.

[Spiral]

I'm confident I will. Thank you for that post, Shannon.

[Spiral]

Things have neutralized alot. I'm very indifferent now. No longer negative.. nor positive. But my mind isn't clouded either SO.. it is kind of frustrating. It's like I have no emotion now.. but I'm sure things will round out nicely in this last week of SM.

[Spiral]

I've noticed that when I get resistance It just brings back so many familiar feelings and attitudes towards myself and others that it's so hard to get out of. I know I said I was neutral yesterday but today I feel negative again. However I'm very carefree and dominant and ready for Friday to get here. With that being said I'm not motivated to do anything at all. Stage 6 is now just getting annoying.

[RainbowAbyss]

that sucks,
are you making changes in the actual routines of your life
or trying new things/putting yourself in new situations.
Sometimes when I feel like that is the last thing I want to do in the world
but still do it, my mentally changes..other times its just a no go.
But if your already in a mental funk you have nothing to lose..so why not.
Spiral you mention alot about how the set is effecting you internally but u haven't talked much about, or maybe I don't remember, how sex magnet is causing changes with your actually relating woman, or how woman are effected by you these days. Whats going on in that area?