Yesterday, 09:18 PM
Day 131,
Today might be my last night taking in subliminal influence from this program.
I would otherwise take two or three days off, and do another seven days and repeat. But I might not.
Currently, I am of a good mood and sound mind, but I'm not as sharp in spirit as I normally am.
I don't attack things with the same fervor that I used to.
I believe that I once used to be fueled by intense insecurity and inner turmoil, which made me attack several habits and disciplines with a ton of intensity.
This could be summarized as a desire to outcompete everyone else so that I could "prove" to others and really "stick it to them"; to make my success so overwhelming and undeniable, and to dangle it over the heads of others - especially women - as a worthy substitute for commitment or emotional reciprocity.
I believe that EPHRA and OGSF have made this way of being go away, and good riddance.
Funny enough, despite this very devious mental software running, I've spun my wheels in many respects.
There was no culminating event, nothing to unleash all of this skill and talent toward, since I wasn't pulling the trigger.
Now, I'm chilling, not attacking any big project at the moment; I'm doing about 60-70% of what I would normally do. I don't have my reasons for going to 90-100% like I once was.
When I use logic to try to pull myself out to 90-100%, it's not satisfying enough for me to jump back in.
I want to do something new and make much more money than I currently am, but my level of desire, excitement, or motivation floats perhaps at a 1-3 out of 10. I know that "discipline beats motivation", but what use is it when my attempts at discipline fizzle out because I don't care about what I'm pursuing?
For this reason, I believe that I need some positive subliminal programming (i.e., to pull me toward an outcome) as opposite to subliminal programming that is made to heal and untangle. I believe that I've gotten the healing that I'm looking for from OGSF.
Very nicely done, Shannon!
For this same reason, I'll be committing to Ultimate Monetary Success v2.
I'm working with a business/spiritual coach and I sincerely haven't been able to drum myself up to fulfill his 1-on-1 action steps; he's understanding to this and realizes that I only act when I have a strong motive and vision for my life.
Fortunately, he's helping me to motivate myself from a Rule 4 perspective using certain practices (might place in Chatterbox or the appropriate room if asked).
That's why time is somewhat weighing on my decision; I've completed 2/3 months of his coaching and I'm more useless than a wet noodle in any business capacity. No juice in the business battery, so I want to recharge that battery as much as possible and direct it toward something useful and fruitful.
Today might be my last night taking in subliminal influence from this program.
I would otherwise take two or three days off, and do another seven days and repeat. But I might not.
Currently, I am of a good mood and sound mind, but I'm not as sharp in spirit as I normally am.
I don't attack things with the same fervor that I used to.
I believe that I once used to be fueled by intense insecurity and inner turmoil, which made me attack several habits and disciplines with a ton of intensity.
This could be summarized as a desire to outcompete everyone else so that I could "prove" to others and really "stick it to them"; to make my success so overwhelming and undeniable, and to dangle it over the heads of others - especially women - as a worthy substitute for commitment or emotional reciprocity.
I believe that EPHRA and OGSF have made this way of being go away, and good riddance.
Funny enough, despite this very devious mental software running, I've spun my wheels in many respects.
There was no culminating event, nothing to unleash all of this skill and talent toward, since I wasn't pulling the trigger.
Now, I'm chilling, not attacking any big project at the moment; I'm doing about 60-70% of what I would normally do. I don't have my reasons for going to 90-100% like I once was.
When I use logic to try to pull myself out to 90-100%, it's not satisfying enough for me to jump back in.
I want to do something new and make much more money than I currently am, but my level of desire, excitement, or motivation floats perhaps at a 1-3 out of 10. I know that "discipline beats motivation", but what use is it when my attempts at discipline fizzle out because I don't care about what I'm pursuing?
For this reason, I believe that I need some positive subliminal programming (i.e., to pull me toward an outcome) as opposite to subliminal programming that is made to heal and untangle. I believe that I've gotten the healing that I'm looking for from OGSF.
Very nicely done, Shannon!
For this same reason, I'll be committing to Ultimate Monetary Success v2.
I'm working with a business/spiritual coach and I sincerely haven't been able to drum myself up to fulfill his 1-on-1 action steps; he's understanding to this and realizes that I only act when I have a strong motive and vision for my life.
Fortunately, he's helping me to motivate myself from a Rule 4 perspective using certain practices (might place in Chatterbox or the appropriate room if asked).
That's why time is somewhat weighing on my decision; I've completed 2/3 months of his coaching and I'm more useless than a wet noodle in any business capacity. No juice in the business battery, so I want to recharge that battery as much as possible and direct it toward something useful and fruitful.
UMS v2 Journal (current) || Overcoming Fear 5.75G Journal
