My Emotional Healing Journey

[Why So Serious?]

I agree the mind will find anyway it can to resist change, it's not usually your friend. I find I have the biggest breakthroughs in life when I go against everything I logically believe in. Good luck with your journey, I will be reading for I'm also using the same sub.

I can definitely see where your coming from right now my minds feels like my worse enemy. I guess that saying is true about your worst enemy coming from within.

However sometimes it can friendly too so I agree with what Manic360 says.

[Benjamin]

I'm also glad that everything is still working.For a moment I really was going to give it all up. I still feel like doing that unfortunately. How long is this going to last?

Unfortunately nobody knows.. depends on the person. It's important to stick with it and eventually it will clear. Sometimes it gets the most intense before the breakthrough or release. Of course it's hard to keep that in mind when you are going through it yourself as I know all too well.

-Ben

[JackOfHearts]

I see him really like myself/friend but he needs refinememts. He is more like a computer taking commands from the exterior. He is working/behaving differently than us. But we are actually the master and his he is receiving orders. We are the one responsible. So the one to blame the "devilish" behavior is us. And yes not everyone has the same inner self obviously like normal human beens.

[Why So Serious?]

Thanks Ben, Maniac and Tao. You guy's have been pretty helpful.

Day 49

It's weird as of this morning I want to listen to this more often. I guess I can't complain but it is weird either way. I don't think I have any results to report on than that. Other than it feels like that part of my personality that I have been hiding is starting to come out little by little. I just hope that people won't look at me in a bad way.

And for some odd reason since day 20 I have been focused (too much at least I think so) on losing my virginity. It's like that's the number one thing on my mind for some odd reason.

[JackOfHearts]

I just post an update about your personality, you might want to check it, especially for the virginity part

[Why So Serious?]

Thanks that defiantly put things in perspective

I have been listening to sub for a couple of days. I have done some thinking lately and I think its time to start AF. Some life events are happening that is really pointing toward that direction. And I may have procrastinated on doing it say several months. Every time the opportunity to do AF showed up I would pick something else. I would always tell my self I will do it later when this or that is taken care of. I guess it is true what they about the path with the least resistance. I have even procrastinated the last couple of days.

So it's to move on to something that is definitely out of my comfort zone.

[Why So Serious?]

Change in plans with everything that has been happening lately I'll have to continue listening to this sub for a couple more weeks. My money is really tied up right now.

Day 57

It's been difficult I mentioned that above. And to make matters even worse a couple of friends won't be around anymore. I'm just sad right now. It seems like everything isn't going right all of a sudden.

[Why So Serious?]

Day 60

At first it felt like everything was coming apart with everything happening, however a friend of mine told me that this is the time to reevaluate my life.
Also for some odd reason today I just don't feel as bad about everything that happened. I'm still upset but it will all take of itself in the end.

[Why So Serious?]

Day 61

I woke up feeling really angry with myself about the situation I am in. I feel like something is going to give. Even with me out of transportation I should still have been able to go out or at least talk on the phone. I should be enjoying every minute of my life but I keep putting it hold for some reason I don't know. Fear maybe?

Also I started the special meditation set yesterday. After I did a session I just wanted to break the tv, computer screen anything that was a waste of time. I was just so upset that I and anyone could waste there time in front of these things is insane. I wanted to cry and scream. The session did bring up other stuff I'm just not sure if it will be good to post it here

I think I'll make a separate journal about the meditation set. I'm still debating on whether it will be a good idea or not.

[Shawn]

Looks like some things are coming to the surface. Just keep going and you will overcome it. Journal about a meditation set sounds harmless initially. But if it's really so bad maybe you want to post it in the 18+ section (if you decide to do so)

[Shannon]

Are you using the Special Meditations set according to the instructions for long term training, starting with the highest frequency first? What is the specific frequency of the track you are using?

[Why So Serious?]

Are you using the Special Meditations set according to the instructions for long term training, starting with the highest frequency first? What is the specific frequency of the track you are using?

Yes I'm using it as instructed for long term use. I started with stage one which is 43hhz.

[Why So Serious?]

Looks like some things are coming to the surface. Just keep going and you will overcome it. Journal about a meditation set sounds harmless initially. But if it's really so bad maybe you want to post it in the 18+ section (if you decide to do so)

Yes it is and it's very painful to say the least.

I guess it is harmless so I'll give it shot.