LionKing's Mating Season (SM3)

[SargeMaximus]

Ok, cool. I don't think I ever see her face.. its not that I try and can't make it out, but its just that I don't think I even communicate with her too much. Its more like I know I'm not alone and that she is right there next to me, or slightly behind me. Very cool. What you're saying about the individuation process makes sense in a way, because I have been incorporating the shadow parts more & more lately. I'll have to read up about the anima.

You're aware of it then? That's good. Most people aren't.

If you feel inseperable from this female presence, it may simply be that you are becoming aware of the anima. If she plays no other role in the dream than to simply be "felt", then that would be my guess.

[LionKing]

You're aware of it then? That's good. Most people aren't.

If you feel inseperable from this female presence, it may simply be that you are becoming aware of the anima. If she plays no other role in the dream than to simply be "felt", then that would be my guess.

No, she's a separate character from me, but its like if you walk side by side with someone you can at times see her in the unfocused part of your vision and sometimes not, but you about know where she is because of the intermittent glimpses. And she's always doing the same thing I am, with me. If that wasn't some particular dream character, she sat behind me on a scooter, I remember seeing her leg (jeans) and feeling her hands on my shoulders. No particular personality to her, maybe a long-term gf, familiar friend, sister, companion.

Btw, wikipedia mentions the "theriomorphic and inferior-function of the shadow", where Therianthropy = "the mythological ability of humans to metamorphose into animals through shapeshifting.". On the same night of the wise old man -dream I had the me & the female (animus) captured by a predatory talking animal (shadow), who was very violently (and calmly) killed by an even more dangerous predator. Or I don't know if they actually talked, but they were definitely conscious and had possibly bound us. Fun stuff :)

I'll have to ask a female if she remembers a recurring male character with her in dreams... My female character is always following my lead, but I wonder if the male is following her lead in her dreams or not, because leading is a masculine trait? So do people usually see the faces of their anima/animus in these dreams? If so, is the face always the same across dreams or does it vary? It it can seem like anyone you know, it could basically be any sex dream or any encounter, or are there some special signs I could ask?

[SargeMaximus]

You're aware of it then? That's good. Most people aren't.

If you feel inseperable from this female presence, it may simply be that you are becoming aware of the anima. If she plays no other role in the dream than to simply be "felt", then that would be my guess.

No, she's a separate character from me, but its like if you walk side by side with someone you can at times see her in the unfocused part of your vision and sometimes not, but you about know where she is because of the intermittent glimpses. And she's always doing the same thing I am, with me. If that wasn't some particular dream character, she sat behind me on a scooter, I remember seeing her leg (jeans) and feeling her hands on my shoulders. No particular personality to her, maybe a long-term gf, familiar friend, sister, companion.

Ok so, if she's just hanging with you, it's probably as I say: she is your anima but you're not aware of her yet, hence why there's no face. Keep in mind, your unconscious tries to show your conscious mind things it is unaware of so that you can incorporate them into your waking life. In this case, your unconscious is trying to show you that you have a feminine side that's always with you.

Btw, wikipedia mentions the "theriomorphic and inferior-function of the shadow", where Therianthropy = "the mythological ability of humans to metamorphose into animals through shapeshifting.". On the same night of the wise old man -dream I had the me & the female (animus) captured by a predatory talking animal (shadow), who was very violently (and calmly) killed by an even more dangerous predator. Or I don't know if they actually talked, but they were definitely conscious and had possibly bound us. Fun stuff

The female is the anima, not animus lol.

But it's important to recognize what the shadow IS. It's not a shapeshifting creature, it's simply aspects of your personality that you do not like or see as immoral (especially). Now it can MANIFEST as a creature, or a person, or a situation, it doesn't really matter.

Clear signs of the shadow in your dream are:

- fear of the element/character (with characters, again, you must see the face unless you can't, in which case the fear would be of a situation or something else)
- Character/element is a threat to you, specifically
- Police or other such authorities chase and hunt down the character to save YOU from it

Again, the shadow is an assortment of aspects of your own personality that are considered "bad", immoral, or socially unacceptable. Therefore, in dreams, often times we feel threatened when the shadow is making more of it's presence felt.

This can happen in real life as well. If you've ever been around a group of guys who start talking about gay stuff and the air gets an eerie tension, it's the shadow in all of them starting to wake up.

Just like children, the shadow doesn't like being ignored, and will often act up at the most inopportune times in order to be seen. Most people experience this as sudden outbursts of anger, or sexual fetishism, afterwards they do the WORST thing, which is to reprimand themselves for the "where did THAT come from?" behavior, instead of recognizing it as part of themselves, and incorporating it.

You cannot be whole until you accept and incorporate your dark side.

Again, think of the yin-yang.

I'll have to ask a female if she remembers a recurring male character with her in dreams... My female character is always following my lead, but I wonder if the male is following her lead in her dreams or not, because leading is a masculine trait?

The anima/animus doesn't have to be a recurring character. It just has to be gendered either male or female, and have a face (except, possibly, in your case here). The anima/animus is an aspect of your personality. The dream characters are just your unconscious mind's way of trying to show you something about it.

In your case, I'd almost bet that you are unaware of your own feminine side, in which case the unconscious cannot show you WHICH girl you are like (which would be the purpose of a face), but it DOES want to show you that you do, in fact, have a feminine aspect to you.

So do people usually see the faces of their anima/animus in these dreams?

I do most of the time, but it's not required. It depends what your unconscious is trying to show you. To discover that, you kind of have to see what each thing/character/situation/place in the dream means to you, specifically, then take the feelings, the mood, the overall story, and see if you can tie that back to anything that's going on in your recent day-to-day existence.

If so, is the face always the same across dreams or does it vary? It it can seem like anyone you know, it could basically be any sex dream or any encounter, or are there some special signs I could ask?

Faces are irrelevant in that a face is just a symbol that points to something.

For example, if a girl has a dream about her father, I would tell her it's actually the animus part of herself that is LIKE her father in the ways demonstrated within the dream.

Like wise if someone has a nightmare where someone chases them in a mall and no one is there to help them. I'd first recognize the shadow element, then ask them what the mall might have to do with them putting on an act to fit in.

[LionKing]

Stage 1, Day 20. Feeling good again.

I found an affirmation that really hit home yesterday. I was feeling some anxiety about going out yesterday, specifically about either going out alone or with an old friend of mine who is in a relationship. I was anxious that I can't talk to any girls while I'm out with him or other such friends, mostly because I felt I'd be "the weird guy" who walks up to girls when others in the group are in long-term relationships. Like I'd have to perform for them. After a while, I did find the belief that "I'm a failure because I can't seem to find a quality girl to be my girlfriend" hiding underneath it all. Its not that I'm even looking for one, and I don't even consciously want one, but there it was, still unchallenged. And then I had this idea that if I don't seem to meet those really quality kinds of girls, I should at least be swimming in pussy to validate that being single was/is good choice for me.

Anyway, I did some click tracks on that and then attempted to reverse it into a positive statement. What I came up with was something like: "I love being single, because I'm always free to meet new people everywhere I go, and because every situation has that slight excitement to it (where anything could happen).". I'm feeling really good about that one and I'll hammer it in for a week or so. Its what I already though logically, just seems I wasn't completely congruent with it emotionally. Lately I've been way too focused on what causes anxiety, where I need to improve, how many subliminal stages left until something happens, etc.. but with this newly regained focus, I'm much more optimistic, I'm actually looking for situations where something could happen now, anytime. More excited about life. It puts AA in a new light as well, because I'm not expecting anything to happen most of the time I go out or talk to people, but a conversation going bad is absolutely nothing against that awesome feeling when things DO suddenly click, out of the blue.

The scene I have in mind is: I'll go somewhere, a woman who is absolutely gorgeous to me suddenly appears somewhere, we either lock eyes or I just oggle at her for a while with my jaw hanging out.. I feel to urge to approach and I go with it - unprepared. Magic happens. Doesn't really matter if I was feeling a bit tired just before that, I know it'll be like I just drank 5 Red bulls when I'm gazing into her eyes. That actually makes me look forward to going out, instead of the usual slight self-conscious anxiety.


And yeah, I did go out yesterday. No "results", but it did go very well. Obvious signs of attraction in a way that I haven't noticed before. Girls getting really flustered and giggly when I go talk to them, girls clearly expecting me to start talking to them at the bar while waiting for drinks, etc. I came to stand behind this 1 girl at the bar, slightly to her right. She never looks at me, but kinda starts holding her head more to right, so I'm in her peripheral vision (were about half a meter apart). Then when she was looking straight ahead for a moment, I decided to leave and right when her head turned back to the right and I'm not there anymore she jerks all the way around and starts searching for faces in the crowd behind her :D There was also an absolutely gorgeous blonde who I went out with a few times last year who was quite happy to see me now and started asking me lots of questions when I didn't rush to fill the silence. She's taken though. Started an interaction by complimenting (more like stating facts) this one girl from the bottom of my heart and her smile was amazing.. she kept staring at me, smiling and fidgeting with anything within arms reach, lol. The only thing that bugs me is that I sprayed on some of those pheromones I ordered in midsummer (1 Cohesion + 1 Evolve).. I haven't noticed any effect from them before, but now I wonder how much of it was due to them. Its great if they work, but I'll most likely stop using those just to be able to see my results better.

The initial attraction, comfort and me showing sexual interest seem to be pretty much handled, but much is still left to done in the subsequent leading department. I can get the "so... what now..." feeling some times and then it kinda dies out. I feel fine about dancing on the dance floor, but blocked towards just going up to dance with girls (in a "Hi, let's play" manner, not grinding against their asses). I'll clear those too.

The first stage seems really long for some reason and I am looking forward to stage 2 because it seems all the fun behavioral shifts really start there (eye seduction, escalation, sexual stamina, etc).

EDIT: The amount of spontaneous belly laughs that escape from me has also gone up lately. Started to increase during AM6 and now that seems to continue :)

[RainbowAbyss]

I really like your last post..a lot of really insightful stuff, especially
about the unchallenged belief of not having a quality girlfriend-
I've definitely fallen into that trap before...
what about something like "I love the freedom, fulfillment, and excitement of/in my life, needing nothing, but simply being myself and this makes high quality woman way more likely to show up everywhere in my life and try to get together with me, its icing on the cake"
cohesion and evolve-those are steve O's new company phermones right? I haven't used new phermones in a while but I miss them, just A314 for business stuff nowadays ...
I noticed on SM 1 that mones could make my results weaker, either because the subtly changed my natural new behavior, or cause its to much with the sexual auras. But I've gotten great results with and without so who knows..its always more how sharp I am at the time then any external factor.

[LionKing]

RainbowAbyss - Thanks. At first I thought that affirmation you wrote is WAY too long, but the more I look at it the more I like it. Very holistic. Just a bit hard to remember and use with the pstec positive tracks, but I'll try it, maybe split it into two parts.

SteveO's company yes, though I have no prior experience with mones. I was just waiting to start SM3 so anxiously while on AM6 that I ordered some to alleviate that, lol. I'm kind of finding that even if they do work (not sure) they're pretty quick to develop a mental addiction where you'd feel you can't be 100% on without them. Also, I ordered the Pepper & Nutmeg cover scent which is really freaking strong and sticks to any clothes that touch it for days.

[LionKing]

Stage 1, Day 23. Work anxiety.

I've always been easily stressed by work and I've been in a very stressful situation at work for a while now. In short, I'm working long hours but due to certain reasons outside of my control I must do all that work in secret and instead continuously report almost zero progress on the thing that I'm actually personally responsible for, and should be doing. To make it worse, I'm also completely stuck on that main problem so I wouldn't even know where to begin if I did have the time. Not a strong position for me to be in meetings. Basically I'm stressed all day, lethargic, unable to hold eye contact and completely out of energy when I finally get home. I feel like a completely different person on the weekends. Socializing feels really good in comparison, esp. anything sexual seems to really bring me back to life, but I don't have the energy for it during the week.

If I can clear a good chunk of that anxiety, then maybe I won't burn so much energy with it and I can actually solve things one at a time instead of just feeling blocked with everything at once and wanting to escape. I did 1 accelerator track, 7 eef tracks, 1 positive track and went jogging today.. I feel a bit better and got some perspective on it. I'll have to find a way to do pstec or feft at work once that anxiety creeps in and maybe I can make some progress with this.

[SargeMaximus]

Love the sub-title lol.

But yeah, tapping at work is a god-send. Literally grew my balls for me last week.

But why you have to work in secret? That's really weird to me.

[LionKing]

Stage 1, Day 25. Sub-titles rock, though nothing comes to mind here. "Drunken musing", let's say. Btw, its your journals, but just saying it is a bit challenging to know where you guys are going in your programs when you don't post the stage and day information ;)

Click tracks at work seem to be just what the doctor ordered. I feel this can actually increase the overall quality of my life considerably if if the indications from these last 2 days are to be believed.. I noticed I had gotten a bit chaotic in how I plan & prioritize what I do, just keeping everything in my head and to multitask. I feel a bit calmer now, and I started to again write out the 3 most important tasks for the day in the morning and check them out once they're done. Sarge - yeah, its got to do with how my manager manages finances and resources sometimes, I won't get into it. It is weird. And over soon, I hope.

I've had no sign of attraction during the week, but that's just because of circumstances. I'm going out proper tomorrow. I was also out briefly just now.. a girl texted my to come for a beer, and it turned out it was actually 2 couples, including her & her new bf, and another taken girl. Didn't know anyone but had 1 beer and got along great with everyone and flirted some with 2 of the girls without anyone minding, lol. Going out feels pretty great now, I get this endorphin rush just hanging around talking to girls. I don't know if this is NSFM (Shannon mentioned somewhere that it somehow imitates the feeling of having had a few drinks, "loosened up") or if its just me basking in my own sexual aura. The last 2 times having that first beer actually makes me feel weaker because I lose that feeling of control and sensitivity of my aura that I seem to have developed now. Or maybe substitute the word "aura" with "arousal", idk. But I do know it makes me feel good, like on extacy or something, and girls like to be around me while I enjoy it.

One thing I realized today: I thought I was relaxed before when I wasn't twichy and I was keeping myself pretty calm, actively relaxing my muscles. No, relaxed is when you don't have to think about being relaxed, its like you're on the playground wearing all dirty clothes and not caring about anything especially. It allows spontaneity for you and people to be relaxed around you. And I feel like my voice turns into this low rumble that could put a crying baby to sleep in seconds, lol.

Still working on getting to hang around more women during the day/week. My work sucks hard in this regard, but hopefully I'll have more energy for hobbies etc after some tapping @ work. I'm also going to work on getting more in touch with some of my friends and new people so that I can go out "in a normal way" more and less with my PU friends, where its almost like going out alone. And yes, going out completely alone still feels daunting to me.

[SargeMaximus]

Tap the alone shit! Have you seen the new breakthrough? Tap on people's behavior you don't like and it magically disappears. :o

Try that with going out.

[LionKing]

I've tried to clear it from a few angles but I'm not there yet.. I've tried:
-imagining feeling anxious while waiting alone in a long queue to enter a club
-the feeling of "no escape" where you can't see anyone interesting to talk to, and don't have friends there to fall back to
-something other angles too, can't remember

I did go into a bar alone yesterday, but I was ready to end the night already and didn't see anything interesting so I just left. Now that you said it (in your journal) I think going out alone is DESPERATE. When I go out with friends, I think it'll be fun and I'll get to joke around & stuff and then go when I see someone I like. Usually we split up anyway and once we've been in the bar for a while its almost like we're there alone. I almost always talk to girls alone, its just simpler that way. Or the other option is 2 guys and 2 girls who divide into 2 pairs. If I'd go out alone, there'd be nothing to do but to "stalk & hunt" for chicks, is what I think.. I also have this idea that I'd be very low-energy and that I'd need to drink a lot, because for some unintelligible reason I couldn't just drink coke like I normally do.. I feel I'd still need to drink something (more than with friends), because I *couldn't* just stand there for long.. and hangovers suck (excuse). I think the right way to think of it would be to just go over (to the bar & to people there) and see if there's anything fun ("socializing is just a fun game"), but I'm not quite there yet with this alone stuff.

I didn't think to run the normal click tracks for positive affirmations before, that could work. I mean, not work to install the affirmation, but to trigger those negative emotional responses and delete them. What if I thought to myself "going out alone is desperate" while doing it, theoretically I'd just well on it seemingly endlessly, until I'd start to giggle like a girl? Kinda feels bad to repeat a negative affirmation, though. Well, I'll try it.

[SargeMaximus]

Yes but you DELETE the negative affirmation somehow.

I haven't got the giggles. The best way for me to know I'm clearing is yawning, tears, and a stronger boner afterwards >>

But yeah, wallowing in your negativity is great while tapping.

[LionKing]

So, I wallowed For almost 2 hours I really tried to feel every bit of negative self-talk I could possibly bring up about going out alone, bars, being sober, pathetic, lame, low-energy, old, accidental pregnancies, drunken people are loud, I'm alone, nobody likes me, I can't connect with anyone, all that shit lol. Not sure how much progress I made, but that definitely feels useful. I didn't even think to let myself wallow like that, I thought to construct these "situations" in my head where some negative emotion comes up and clear that, or to word affirmations in the positive and positive click click. Ima do some more for "I'm meeting gorgeous, single women who want me, easily and consistently" still before tonight.

I haven't gotten the giggles myself for some time now. But I do get tearing/wetting in my eyes quite often. Boner, yeah.. but also, SM3.

[SargeMaximus]

I haven't gotten the giggles myself for some time now. But I do get tearing/wetting in my eyes quite often. Boner, yeah.. but also, SM3.

Lol, right... SM 3.

But yeah, glad you find it useful. I'm finding that it's bringing up beliefs and fears I never knew I had, so I just wallow on the new stuff that comes up till I'm full of it and clearing it all away.