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Title: Journal | Laser Focus & Concentration (5.75g - Type A/B/C/D Hybrid)
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#15
(10-28-2021, 06:06 PM)Shannon Wrote: Amazing the difference it creates, isn't it?  The description of your time off almost makes me wonder if the reason for ADD/ADHD is not in whole or in part actually some part of the subconscious running rampant.

That's a super interesting concept. Maybe ADHD sufferers are missing an ability to somehow cause the subconscious to "tone it down" and not be running on '11' 24/7 (Spinal Tap reference). Or maybe still, if the subconscious is running all the time anyway, for people with ADHD some aspects of it runs closer to the conscious threshold. Just enough to have impact on us in a way it doesn't for other people and we lack an ability to set or maintain a boundary for it. That is, to push it back away from the threshold of consciousness. Interesting...
 
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#16
Day 4-8 Cycle 2

Note: I'm still keeping daily private journals but I've decided to do more of a weekly or per cycle summary update here. I think it gets kind of monotonous posting "nothing major happened" or similar every day. Most days it's just notes for myself.

It did feel like it took the first few days of the cycle to get back "up to speed" from the off cycle. Well I'd have to say days 4-5 feels like the program has only been maybe 50% as effective as the first cycle. I was barely productive compared to the first cycle. Days 6-8 I had almost no desire to even play the program and in fact even had debates with myself about playing it, but I did. I did get some insight into this, and I'll write it at the end. Days 6-8 I was easily able to talk myself out of staying focused. I feel like old me again. Everything that I think of that I want to do or need to do sounds boring (see the meme quotes I posted above); so I don't do anything. Everything evaporated again. I wasted a lot of time these last three days looking at absolutely pointless things on google maps and watching pointless videos on youtube, wasting time scrolling through Reddit reading about trivial things. I told myself I need to complete my coursework and work on other projects and then immediately thought "it's too boring or not interesting" and so I didn't. But it's no problem to spend hours watching stupid videos that don't do anything for me...

I feel tired but not as tired as I was at the end of the first cycle. Sleep wasn't a problem at all this cycle though. I fell asleep with no problem and had normal sleeping hours so I was really happy about that. I haven't changed anything about how I play the program. Playing it as I'm falling asleep, four loops. Daily taking two tsp of fish oil and a vitamin B supplement.

I'll be honest. Right now I'm not convinced this program is a viable option for me for my long term treatment of my ADHD. And I know there is no claim or anything that it can be one. I have hopes that it is though, and it was my choice to give it a try. After how it's been the last three days, I'm not sure. But I'll continue on and see. There is something subtly different though overall and in general like I wrote about before. So that gives me hope.

Insight : There is a very strong chance that I can be experiencing some major resistance to the side effect of success and accomplishment that I've achieved the first cycle. I've struggled with a "fear of success" mentality my whole life. And as I've worked through the first cycle and enjoyed getting things done and feeling for the first time like my life was mine and I was taking control of it; these fears can come in and sabotage everything. So what to do about that? One thing at a time I guess.
 
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#17
This definitely sounds like subconscious sabotage and resistance. I'm curious how much of boring is a real problem and how much of it is escapism from responsibility. What if ADD or ADHD is really an inner child with too much control?
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator

The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
 
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#18
As someone who also has ADHD I find your journal fascinating. If I was running OFV3 I would be very tempted to run LFC.
 
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#19
(11-03-2021, 09:15 PM)Shannon Wrote: This definitely sounds like subconscious sabotage and resistance. I'm curious how much of boring is a real problem and how much of it is escapism from responsibility. What if ADD or ADHD is really an inner child with too much control?

Thanks for your insight into that Shannon. I wish I knew so I could take action on it!
 
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#20
(11-05-2021, 05:17 AM)JCasterlin Wrote: As someone who also has ADHD I find your journal fascinating. If I was running OFV3 I would be very tempted to run LFC.

The reason I wanted to post a journal about my experience is to help both sufferers and Shannon. I'm glad it can give you some insight.
 
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#21
Day 1-2 Cycle 3

Something happened during the off cycle (which was two days this time). It's like the script is starting to gain a foothold in my brain. I just subtly had a desire to focus and got working again on coursework and projects in a more natural feeling way than before. I was expecting this strong desire to kick me like it did the first few days of the first cycle, but it hasn't worked like that. I'm happy to report that it feels like it's working but in an unexpected way. Baby steps. It's only the third cycle of the first playthrough. 

Unless something really big happens I'll write again at the end of the cycle.
 
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#22
The goal of long term use is to gradually install the script as new subconscious programming that becomes the default. The closer you get to that the less obvious it will be.
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator

The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
 
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#23
(11-07-2021, 05:29 PM)Reznik Wrote: Day 1-2 Cycle 3

Something happened during the off cycle (which was two days this time). It's like the script is starting to gain a foothold in my brain. I just subtly had a desire to focus and got working again on coursework and projects in a more natural feeling way than before. I was expecting this strong desire to kick me like it did the first few days of the first cycle, but it hasn't worked like that. I'm happy to report that it feels like it's working but in an unexpected way. Baby steps. It's only the third cycle of the first playthrough. 

Unless something really big happens I'll write again at the end of the cycle.
I also experienced this on MLS, which has some overlapping goals with LF&C.
At first, the sub is very noticeable and causes a state change. Then this state change disappears and you are almost back to the way you are before. Suddenly you notice how your "normal" has improved. And then the cycle starts again, like waves of improvement smoothing the beach.

Have a great day
MM
 
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#24
That's called the "tidal effect". It's listed in the Glossary.
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator

The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
 
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