(09-11-2016, 11:29 AM)chaosvrgn Wrote: It's resistance. And it's getting worse today. I have a raging headache. There's so much "pressure" in my head -- I'm guessing from being so tense. AM6 induced some soul sucking resistance, but nothing like DMSI. I don't even think it's the sub itself -- it's loaded with anti-resistance technologies. It's the subject matter. I feel like I'm coming down with the flu. I'm getting to the point where I'm wondering why I'm even bothering to endure so much pain over women. Looking at the DMSI sales page, wondering how the hell I let the world mess with my head so much that I would resist a subliminal that encourages you to love and value yourself.
Enraged that we should even have to deal with this. All most men want is to contribute to society, have a good job, a nice wife, some kids and a home, but the cost to do so is your self-respect, your dignity and your identity.
I keep telling myself that this will pass and I'll be in full control of my life. But man, this f*cking hurts in the process. And at the end of the day, you feel like you have no one. If you go to a woman to talk about such things, she'll only look down on you with pity, treat you like you're a lesser lifeform.
"L" asked why I act the way I act sometimes. I told her that "risk" defines my life. Everything I do revolves around risk. Risk of a failing business. She came from a super rich family. When she lost her job, her rich ass family just took care of her for a year. I'm having to hustle everyday to make money -- and I mean hard. Risk of rejection. I told her that if women had to endure rejection on the level men did, they'd lose their damn minds. As men, we're forged in the flames of rejection, but when you're in the fire ALL the time, you just wanna be able to step out and cool yourself off -- just for a minute -- before someone calls you weak and worthless and thinks they're superior by virtue of vagina.
But... I'm going to march on. Keep running DMSI until I'm healed to the point that I can function without hate. I noticed that the first week of v2.4 was filled with abundance and prosperity. Lots of motivation. Whether I want to admit it or not, holding all this disdain and hate in my heart will only hold me back. So, for now, I'll suffer and keep fighting on.
Feeling similar thoughts as well, there is some sort of anger i have against my self like why do i have to go through all this? I thought this would be all over once i do my first AM6 run. I guess even you who did it twice feel the same way.
Even more women are still ghosting me to a lesser degree than v2.3 i mean even before subs there were mad signs of attraction with women now i have to litteraly do every goddamn thing to make it happen. One little mistake and its all over. Then you have to go back convincing your self of abundance when you have nothing to work with. The more work and subs i do, the more progress i make the more i realise how damn long this road is.
Edit: also i realise the more days go by, the weaker the aura gets.
INTJ
