DMSI journal

[whome]

I thought you had to listen to all the subs for 21 hours per day! I'm listening to E2 for that long. Am I making a mistake in doing so?

Each sub's page says how to listen to it. For E2:

To use this program, simply calibrate the volume and choose the track you wish to use. Then, play that track on loop for 8 to 21 hours per day, up to the amount you can handle. [...] Expected optimal usage per day will be between 8 and 12 hours for most people. Your mileage may vary.

Other subs have explicit directions as to the number of loops recommended, and my comment was in the context of one of those subs.

[Benjamin]

The main thread is all "you think you have it rough and are complaining about 8 loops a day? we used to listen to our subs 21 hours a day".

Sigh.

I'm not complaining, I'm still trying to figure out how to do it. I've been trying to switch from sleeping with earplugs to my new Kokoon headphones. I could go back to using earplugs and do ultrasonic on my phone. I could put in a wire to my Kokoons (since no one seems to like Bluetooth for these subs), turn off noise cancelling, and do the masked subs. I could run the ultrasonic track on my Phantom all the time and get extra hours in that way. Options, options.

The current plan that I have is to wire the Kokoons and play it from my phone. The problem there is that I'm not yet good at sleeping in the Kokoons, and that's already disrupting my sleep, so how will adding DMSI to the mix alter things? Who knows. Sigh.

I'm going to take tomorrow and Thursday off, and then starting with Friday (or really starting with Thursday as I go to bed) I'll start the 7+3.

[Edit: on my iPad, of course, because my phone needs to plug in to recharge and it has no headphone jack. AAaaaaaaaargh!]

[Edit: OK, the Kokoons aren't going to work with a cord. If I use them without turning them on, then they're just sound dampers and I can use ultrasonic on my phone.

The reason I liked listening at work was because when I sleep I have something blocking my ears, and I don't know how it attenuates the sound of the sub playing. When I listened at work, at least I knew that I could listen with good headphones. I don't see that as a good option any more.]

I thought you had to listen to all the subs for 21 hours per day! I'm listening to E2 for that long. Am I making a mistake in doing so?

Have you actually read any of the instructions?

E2 is basically 5g instructions http://www.subliminal-shop.com/5g-instructions/ minimum of 8 hours. 21 hours evey day may be a bit much.

And other 5.5g programs after E2 the amount of loops are on the description page, 1 loop is 1 playthrough.

[whome]

Hello, DMSI journal!

For those following this journal, I moved to LTU5 and have been journalling that. In my last post I was hoping that it would be kinder to me, and I was wondering what the "improve your love life" module would do.

So, it's been kinder. Sleep isn't a lot better, but I am sitting in my body more, and while I'm wobbling between grief and being OK, it's not as bad as how DMSI was crushing me. The love life module is not showing up, but that's not unexpected.

The reason I'm exhuming this thread is because I posted a reply about existential terror, and I was thinking about it in relation to sex.

I'm thinking that my subconscious's strong reaction to DMSI is because of the existential terror.

I'm not a virgin. I've had sex a few times, but every time I've done so I've felt disconnected. I've never been able to lose myself in the moment; I've always been extremely conscious about what I'm doing, what her reaction is, am I bringing her pleasure. Being with someone has always felt like I have to manage what's going on, and sex is more of the same.

One of the reasons I was drawn to DMSI was that I'm scared of relating to people. I don't have many friends, and I'm anxious about what it means to be in a friendship, and what they're expecting. I don't have a lot of sexual experience, and being in a relationship with a woman is terrifying, the idea of locking myself into a connection with expectations that I am not sure I can fulfil. So DMSI was all, "hey, have sex with hot women who are in it for the sex and not the relationship".

But having sex with hot women is even more terrifying. What are their expectations? With the women I've been with, who've been of moderate attractiveness, I couldn't get into my body very well, but at least I had somewhat of a pleasurable time. If I'm with a hot woman, I'm wondering if the concern is that my sheer arousal will pull me into my body, and into a space of terror. After having sex one time I fell into a space of deep grief; hitting a space of terror seems quite plausible an outcome.

Which is why I'm not sure if DMSI is right for me. Either I won't be enjoying myself, or I'll likely fall into a space of terror and have the women be scared by my reaction. I started DMSI in the hope that it would be healing to my self image ("oh, look at all of these hot women who want me; I must be good") but now I wonder to what extent I need to heal before using DMSI would even be possible.

[whome]

I'm looking again at the DMSI page and particularly at goals #2 and #4.

Goal #2: To support goal #1, we have to develop, enhance and improve your self esteem, self respect, sense of self worth, self liking, self love, self validation, self support, self confidence, self image, feelings of deservingness and overcome fear and so forth.

Does the existential terror qualify as something to be cleared with goal #2?

Goal #4: To get you past any and all self sabotage and resistance to fully accepting, acting on, acting out and experiencing the goals of this experimental program.

FRM is there to accomplish this one. Suppose that it really is the case that my subconscious is resisting DMSI because it foresees that having sex will trigger my existential terror. In that case, I would consider my subconscious's resistance to be legitimate. Is the FRM smart enough to know that the terror needs to be healed first so that any resistance is then safe to remove?

(These are my thoughts, @Shannon. Not meaning to imply that I know better than you, but wanted to check in with you to share my understanding of myself and see how it corresponds to your programming.)

[Benjamin]

Does the existential terror qualify as something to be cleared with goal #2?

It is technically something that is in the way, so 'maybe'.

But from what you've written, if that's what you're dealing with and with how strong it sounds, DMSI is not really the thing you want to be using for that.

[whome]

But from what you've written, if that's what you're dealing with and with how strong it sounds, DMSI is not really the thing you want to be using for that.

The reason for this post in my old DMSI journal was because I had some new thoughts about DMSI and some new ideas about why it had failed to help me. I'm not currently doing DMSI. I'm doing LTU5 (journal here) and have been for 1½ months.

I tagged Shannon in because my thoughts form an interesting theory about why DMSI failed to work for me. It might be useful, or it might be predicated on a misunderstanding about how DMSI is built. I hope my thoughts about my understanding of myself can help Shannon improve his products.

[whome]

Hello again!

So I’m probably going to start running DMSI. Why?

LTU should be clearly a far better product for me to use. It’s more appropriately targeted for healing, and more directly addresses my issues. However, I ran it. LTU5 wasn’t powerful enough to overcome whatever I’ve got in me.

Meanwhile, the new DMSI has new FRM scripting, and specifically in areas that sound promising. I’m not thinking that all my issues will be solved with it, but I think enough of my issues are around sexuality and human connection that they’ll be in scope for DMSI.

As for LTU, I don’t know what I’m going to do with it. I have 6 months from the end of my running it to decide if I want to ask for a refund, and it’s been about two. If DMSI works, and if the next LTU has that tech, then I’ll upgrade/buy the next LTU. Perhaps clearing enough stuff with DMSI will allow the old LTU to work?

All questions.

[whome]

Before starting up with this, I want to lay out my intentions and my hopes.

The main thing that I’m looking for healing with is a ball of pain in my chest. It’s a combination of existential terror/panic, and self-hatred, with the occasional freakout when I experience what I describe as “the worst acid trip you’ve ever been on”. I tried running LTU (see my LTU journal) but it wasn’t strong enough to get through.

The reason I’m trying DMSI is that a lot of the same issues are connected to sexuality. When I feel sexual arousal, I feel intense grief. When I feel sexual desire, I can feel the burning of self-hatred and worthlessness. I experience the grief and pain in my chest in all areas of my life, but facing sexuality focuses things down.

Which is why I’m hoping that DMSI will be useful. FRM is in there to achieve the purposes of the program, but so many of the larger issues that I want traction with in my life are also issues that are directly in the way of me having sex and a sex life. So fingers crossed.

[Paul1131]

Before starting up with this, I want to lay out my intentions and my hopes.

The main thing that I’m looking for healing with is a ball of pain in my chest. It’s a combination of existential terror/panic, and self-hatred, with the occasional freakout when I experience what I describe as “the worst acid trip you’ve ever been on”. I tried running LTU (see my LTU journal) but it wasn’t strong enough to get through.

The reason I’m trying DMSI is that a lot of the same issues are connected to sexuality. When I feel sexual arousal, I feel intense grief. When I feel sexual desire, I can feel the burning of self-hatred and worthlessness. I experience the grief and pain in my chest in all areas of my life, but facing sexuality focuses things down.

Which is why I’m hoping that DMSI will be useful. FRM is in there to achieve the purposes of the program, but so many of the larger issues that I want traction with in my life are also issues that are directly in the way of me having sex and a sex life. So fingers crossed.

Man, I hope you get what you want out of this.  You deserve to feel better.

[whome]

Man, I hope you get what you want out of this.  You deserve to feel better.

Thank you. I appreciate your support.

And here we go! Downloading.

[whome]

http://www.subliminal-shop.com/product/dmsi-3-3-2/

FRM 4.8 so good it’s listed as two features, #19 and #54. I’ll take it.

[Shannon]

http://www.subliminal-shop.com/product/dmsi-3-3-2/

FRM 4.8 so good it’s listed as two features, #19 and #54. I’ll take it.

LOL  Steve told me I should list it, so I looked through the list and didn't see it and added it again.  I guess I missed it.

[Omni3]

FRM FRM, so good they named it twice..

[Omni3]

I wish you rapid healing Whome