AM7 Stage 0 Healing Bootcamp Bonanza

[Have at ye]

Now I feel way less angry, but sonewhat tired (not exhausted) and slightly down. But still relatively good.

I made some good healing progress im recent days, working through stuff, engaging both conscious and the unconscious.

Observing a definite increase in manly swagger in my walk.

[Have at ye]

Even though I'm currently in healing mode, and thus feeling more contemplative and like chilling, I really do love when US kicks in in Stage 0.

I believe USLMaxx in 6G is gonna be the bomb and a day one purchase for me. Heck, I could envision a premium US-UM-LM combo, to add in motivation to prevent people from couch potatoeing and sitting on their laurels. Now that'd be awesome.

[Have at ye]

Had a very nice day today, despite earlier trepidation and a sense of dejectedness. Had a very fruitful session with lady psychoanalyst, and then a very good piano lesson with pianist chick (didn't use ESPA today - will do it next week).

Still, though I felt pretty good while out and about, I couldn't wait to get back home to continue with my meditations and energetic practices. I'm really on the verge of clearing out some really pesky stuff, and will continue until I do! As well as other things. I think I'm being guided to do so by my subC in order to facillitate healing and GSF removal. Really working hard so that I can finally experience sex and sensuality free of GSF!

The "seat of shame", as I've taken to calling it (the perineum Wonky Sensations area) is getting worked on hard. There's also definite FRM action going on as I'm experiencing a slight (very slight) ambient anxiety (as well as aforementioned Wonky Sensations in that area).

I'm having trouble with my Internet which is making doing BSB translation jobs a nuisance (as well as being pesky in general). Oh well, I won't be making much money that way until I have it fixed/fix it (I've exhausted all I know to do, gonna have to resort to asking my crazy brother, oyy).

Also, got a phonecall today from a lady asking whether I'd be interested in a singing gig - nothing too glamorous, just educational shows for kids, but I have exerience in such and it's always a paying gig. Trouble is, they were hoping I'm an experienced driver to get around between the places - while I have a driver's licence, I haven't been behind the steering wheel in over 5 years; I use the subway to get around, and trains for inter-city comms (I live in a big metropolis. It's the New Yorkers' dilemma: "too much traffic to drive" ). So we'll see how this works out, we have a google meet set up for tomorrow.

[Have at ye]

Having a healing and chilling day today, and I really need one (or more). Still made lots of progress in my energetic workings, though.

Healing yourself the PTRA way does require ample energy but is worthwhile. I am noticing that I have way less negative enotions springing up whenever I touch upon something trauma-related, and am way less angry thanks to it.

The Internet problems are annoying. I think I'm gonna have to use a workaround until I get it fixed by using the connection in my phone.

I love the motivation aspect of Stage 0. Whenever I'm not so focused on healing/resting, I actively look for constructive things to do, and whenever I have something to do or hit a problem, I have less trouble "getting to it" and find solutions rapidly.

I have dance thing tomorrow sponsored by dancer chick with dat ass and her even hotter older sister who's going to be in attendance. Should be fun!

[Have at ye]

Had some very important healing dreams these past couple of days. Sometimes they're a bit chaotic/messy due to the amount of subjects that require PTRA-attention, but the one I just had was very focused and I'm amazed I did not wake up with a start from it. It also clarified some things for me, regarding my subconscious reactions to particular traumas. Good stuff!

[Have at ye]

Nearing the one-month mark.

I am a bit tired of the emotional state see-saw I've been experiencing on this program, but the good news is that my lows aren't as bad now as they used to be. The program is working rapidly and there's a lot to work on in my case, healing-wise, apparently.

Compared to where I was at my lowest, some three years ago or so? I'm in HEAVAN.

I am continuing and will do the full 4 months, not wanting to be a namby-pamby.

I am motivated to continue with the program, and the healing. On moments when I feel baseline-normal I find myself looking for constructive things to do, as stated before, like working out, cleaning up, piano-singing practice, looking for translation gigs and the like. On high moments I can feel the Ultra Success aspects kicking in and I'm very driven and even optimistic about my doings, and making tremendous progress and discoveries in my many interests.

In general, I'm finding that most people are being way more pleasant around me, and act respectfully which is a very welcome change from the incessant attempts at humiliation/belittling I've become unfortunately used to by now.

I've been doing some serious energy workings to help heal love and sexuality aspects of myself as well (focusing on that for now), but I can't go into details. I did find some like-minded individuals (over the Internet mostly) with whom I can discuss these interests and practices, so that's great! A nice side-effect is that my attractiveness is skyrocketing as well and I've been getting some DMSI-like results without actively running DMSI (like deer-in-the-headlights looks and such).

[callie]

How would you compare this program to PRAv1 in terms of purely healing / trauma clearing?

[Have at ye]

How would you compare this program to PRAv1 in terms of purely healing / trauma clearing?

I would put it this way - it does exactly what PRA v1 does, but does not mess around with it. It has a more of a boot-camp quality. PRA v1 is more gentle.

In Stage 0, you will be motivated to keep pressing on with the healing, and it may be at a faster pace than PRA v1.

[Have at ye]

You know what, I miss the DRS v2 so much I started employing a personal practice (using my yet-to-be patented, non-subliminal method which I've been developing for quite some time now, but now am doing so with Ultra Success!) to establish a simple directional reflection shield myself.

It's probably a sling to a bazooka compared to DRS v2, but it's always something! Noticing a significantly lessened amount of thoughts regarding certain people who've been on my mind in a negative way in recent days (f. in. my spidey-sense would indicate my lady psychoanalyst is still salty I've been doing so well, and she can't wrap her head around as to why. She's been told. Multiple times. She should cease her whining. At least my lady psychiatrist - I've got a new one - is taken aback, because after such a recent hospitalization and with my "diagnosis", lewl, I shouldn't be doing and feeling as well as I have been, but she seems to be pleased about it, as she should be, oy). So that's good!

My lady psychoanalyst does appear to have an envious streak, and in an old-school Lacanian fashion likes to present herself in the so-called "Master's discourse" in the course of the analysis. Meh. Frankly, the entire process has been a heavily mixed bag of good and bad.

Hopefully this does not detract too much from all that Stage 0 is doing, as it does require some amount of my personal energy to establish. I'll try to restrain myself and only employ it when going out in public for extended periods of time.

Just 3 more short months and then it's back to the DRS v2 extravaganza!

Been writing a book today, which I plan to self-publish in an electronic format. I'll do Kindle on Amazon and a .pdf version through a personal Internet storefront (I'll probably use something already established, like Gumroad or somesuch). Been writing like mad - or rather, inspired, haha.

[Shannon]

So do I understand correctly that you are doing as well as you are because of the subliminals, and she refuses to believe they work? Or did I miss what was causing the improvements?

[Have at ye]

Yup, subliminals.

I think she's on the fence in her belief. I won't be trying to convince her, let her enjoy her salt.

EDIT

Well, not just subliminals, but my own awesomeness. I also remember her being really salty when I was running OSC with DRS v2, she'd try to shake my self-confidence and self-belief incessantly which I may forgive, but won't forget, heh.

What she seemed to enjoy very much out of Indigo Mind Labs subliminal programs is DMSI 5.1. She was so sweet and helpful then.

[callie]

How would you compare this program to PRAv1 in terms of purely healing / trauma clearing?

I would put it this way - it does exactly what PRA v1 does, but does not mess around with it. It has a more of a boot-camp quality. PRA v1 is more gentle.

In Stage 0, you will be motivated to keep pressing on with the healing, and it may be at a faster pace than PRA v1.

Valid, thanks

[Have at ye]

One month down, three more to go! Lessgo, ya namby-pambies, lessgo!

Alright, I had this thought yesterday before going to sleep. The process I'm undergoing right now feels like recovering from serious surgery (which I went through twice for my tailbone. It was a literal PITA): it's like Jon Irenicus said in Baldur's Gate 2: "the pain will only be passing, you should survive the process". And then all the unplesantness I've been going through during the healing process will be just a faint memory, like, "whoo boy, was that unpleasant " and then I'll feel way better and will be able to function better. Smarter, stronger, sexier, closer to becoming a Golden God of Sex and Song, haha.

"Interesting. You have much untapped power."

"Do you even realize your potential?"

*Dave Warner voice*



Recently, I've been scouring and resarching certain aspects of what I call here my energy workings. I have a bit of an academic background, so I can do proper research and find the useful, practical stuff, and then incorporate it in my practice. It's fascinating, really, and my little book is shaping up nicely. I'm definitely going to publish it upon a day, but first I want to work with the system I came up with personally, to refine and tune it and be able to give proper pointers based on experience.

I have, give or take, 20 pages already. In the process I used my language/translation skills to work out two literary English translations of an Orphic Hymn, and I've shown it to some people and they loved it. So I'm pleased with that.

I also feel extremely pleased and confident in my singing technique recently. So singing practice has been a real productive pleasure everytime (but since I'm still Stage 0ing, I only do it every other day for now. It's not like have any deadline or audition lined up in the near future, so that's kinda meh, but I'm taking steps to rectify that, one day at a time).

[Have at ye]

Feeling pretty good today. I did not practice as much piano as I'd have liked lately, so I made some regression in my playing in today's lesson, but piano-chick was very kind and forgiving, which is a welcome change of pace. We still had a great lesson, she's good! (I didn't use ESPA, though, as I'm making such good progress on Stage 0 these past couple of days I didn't want to derail it in any way).

That creative frenzy I was in was very fruitful. I believe I have definitely come out changed - for the better, and good tidings are ahead! It was also very welcome as I was working through some really heavy stuff, healing-wise, and it took my mind off things, which was a blessing. I have successfully performed a self-initiation, apparently. And I've learned a ton about energetic workings, like f. in. how to make that DRS-like shield on my own, using my own method (because, frankly, I'm a word-sound guy, I *suck* at what's commonly referred to as creative visualization practices, which is the fastest way to perform energy manipulation on your own. So now I have a method that plays to my strengths. It requires some preparation and know-how, but after that, it's really simple and a joy to execute). I'll be testing it out some more, definitely!

Essentially - it's writing poetry. Ayup. I write poems and they're like guides for both your conscious and unconscious to perform, say, a particular energetic operation (like establishing a mirroring shield around your aura, to follow the DRS-equivalent example. Maybe equivalent is too big a word, because comapred to DRS v2 this one's relatively basic, but it's there and it appears to work!)

Continuing. Feeling patient and self-confident and sensual and sexy.

Tomorrow we have lady psychoanalyst and then it's the holidays. I'm visitng my crazy family. I'm actually looking forward to chilling a little, and being able to do singing practice without having to commute to my practice room. I only hope I won't gain too much weight, as it's traditional where I'm from to overeat during various holidays of this kind. Have a good one, everyone who celebrates or has a vacation during this time!