AM6 Run-2 tolgaocal80's Journal

[tolgaocal80]

stage 3 day 27

today, was like shit. I remembered my old beta behaviours and thoughts all day long. When I look at the girls or any situation about related to me, instantly I am feeling sad about what I had done, I am asking "Why I was a loser, why did happened to me, why my parents made me like this etc,?
I know all these are beta thinking,  I dont know what to do,  first  month was good, very good,
2. stage was like hell, I was crying all night, when  I see an emotional or motivational video on youtube etc, but now on stage 3 I am feeling too needy, and "rude".
I believe stage 3 started to take effect just now.
it says stage 3 where is the big guns out, anyone knows about that? what means the core of the alpha training?

very unstable mood for now. Contuining.

Yes it’s the core script. My first run of stage 3 had me in pain,thoughts of suicide& also girls saying I was hot or that I was making them wet,or that I was a player.

In stage 3 a few girls came and asked about me too also, in myself I can feel this time somethings are changing:

I began to give straight answers to anyone whom ask me about anything. For example if s/he are asking me if her nose is warped? I instantly give them the right thing, no concern about will they like my answer. I am figuring out what does it really mean approval seeking now.

I had dream from last night:

I was near to my old home, It was almost night and than started to rain. when I looked at the sky, it was like actually space, I mean it was very large and deep, spectacular view. I was with one of my old friend.
Suddenly it started to change, the idea of that day should be doomsday came to my mind. I was trying to get home, to look for my family, there was a wall from pumpkins at the sky, it was like a tsunami wall but much higher. they were all falling from sky to the ground, and killing people. and also, "breads" were falling from the sky, as like pumpkins.

I  searched for interpretations, but I couldn't find much. 
Maybe my subconscious has gathered this symbols from the collective mind, to show me their means?
What does these things mean in USA culture or you know any nation who celebrates hallowen etc I don't know.
I saw these symbols very clear. Bread and big pumpkins.

[tolgaocal80]

stage4 Day 3

It's interesting that I was feeling very beta and stucked a few days before, in stage 3.
But now I again started to feel relaxed and confident. stage 3 got something in it that I beware. I was feeling something that is very clear but I dont know what it is.

People around me behaving obivious submissive behaviours howbeit I dont feel anything different than normal. I mean I don't see these as a reward or something to celebrate.

I am working more effectively, longer and concentrate.(about 2 months)

Less procastinate (about 3 months)

There is one thing about I see as a problem:
My sex drive is ver low. I dont know why but I just can't have enough willingness to go for a woman and try to seduce her.
For now I dont know how to overcome this. I will try take some zinc and magnesium pills maybe this related to low t rate.

Sometimes I understand how LTU5 users feel the world, relaxed and focused.


A dream:
There was a girl on my highschool, I sent her a text that time, and after that, she just tell everyone in my class about that. I saw this girl in my dream with the same situation but she call me back and I didn't answer, she was asking why I didn't answer the call, I told her because I dont want to do. I think again OGFS doing its job.

[tolgaocal80]

stage 4 day 8

I am finding myself very angry for cold jokes, and giving response right then. I mean I don't even realize how I look from outside but they say, how can you shifting your mood so quickly? its just a joke. and this is getting solid about 2 months.

Procrastination decreased significiantly,

More focus at doing my things and saying others quickly " No" I am doing another thing.

Acquaintances, friends trying to do some favor for me, paying meal, doing my homework reports and spending time with me. and when I say I am doing this and this they wanna involve in it.

Stabile mood contuining, dreams a lot.

I was wandering around the forum and I saw a qoute from Shannon on a question that about long-term usage multistages.

"""Eventually, as with all periods of sleep and dreaming, you will awaken quite naturally.
7G? I'm more than a year in working on 6G, still wondering if 6G is even possible, and you're assuming 7G?
Let's stick to reality.
Let's say I build all three of those programs again. Let's say I build them in 5.5G. Let's say you use them for 10 years back to back.
Okay, now we're in the realm of "possible".
What would happen? You'd become fully potentiated in those directions. As in, you would end up becoming the living, breathing expression of those scripts.
That would be true even with the current versions.”””

very well said. after this run I will do one more run and I guess another one after that.
I am doing my runs on ocean masked with high sound, because of this stubborn personality issue. 6.40-8 hours night with speakers and more than 5 runs on headset, with a total 12-14.4 hours listening time.

[tolgaocal80]

stage 4 day 12

I am receiving IOI's almost every girl I saw, although it seems some strange, they are displaying IOI's whom are older than me (30-45 y.o) with some fear I guess. they are acting like uncomfortable with the situation but giving IOI's either.

Its still continues and I guess this became solid in me, that everybody I interact, acting really nice and polite to me.

I saw IOI's from girls almost all the time in my life. but I could never do something about that. something is just stopping me from getting sexual or even interact with girls. Maybe I am afraid of expressing sexualty or women. I dont want this. Its really mean nothing receiving IOI's from girls if you don't do anything to make things happens.
I understand AM will not cover that or this thought is just a tactic that using by s.c. but doesn't matter I will cover that.

AM making me relaxed about small-talks I can speak everybody with a relaxed postures and a clear voice. But when I feel some way to sexuality, some feeling just starting I dont understand them, they just shutting me down.

[tolgaocal80]

stage 4 day 16

I just wanted to report some, I am really feeling stage 4, everthing around me getting clear and clear, I am watching people's behaviours, actions and can feel their self-esteem, self-confidence level according to how they move or responds to situations.

Girls started to trying to talk with me, they are displaying respect indicators, IOI's and some shame, maybe this fast change in their behaviours get confused them.

I am feeling very good, just figured out how its like The James Bond effect. Before (I cant remember exactly when) that Run, I wasn't "able to" even talk to anyone who I dont know, no need to say girls. Now things getting up starting and speeding up.

I am just doing my thing and I don't feel any uncomfortable. Slowly understand what is the real mean of Transencend Alpha Male.

[tolgaocal80]

I want to ask a question about manifestation methods:

The manifestation methods or ways in the multistages (AM_WM_SM) , are the same way in MYP subs?
Are we have to wait to see manifestations on multistages like MYP. Are they complex as MYP subs. for example AM friends manifestations?

Thanks for answers
I didn't create a thread for this short question.

[tolgaocal80]

stage 4 day 28

I realized that since run 1, I became highly sensetive to any kind of "stimulus". Coffe, cola and any kind of drink with high sugar causes to headache, one cigarette (normal cigarette) and I am like high, a beer and I am drunk.

I remember I was drinking 3 cups of coffe a day and everything was normal, or some kind of drink with sugar.
Especially for coffee:
I am just drinking 1 coffe sometime in day and, the time I take the sip, my head starts to ache, very strong and long ache.
I am ashamed to say, one time mstrbting and the hell headache starting very hard.

I think this kind of effects are showing that my brain responses for various happiness hormones like endorhpin, serotonin, are healing and regenarating. This headache is like something that stopping me from doing this things, I am not smoking cigarettes or drinking any alcohol for 2-3 months. I just dont need them. Very good.

My perceptions of women, I think getting more warm and stabile and without anger.
I now want to talk with some of them, and I have no expectation from them.
I am starting to enjoy company of them. and they are really feeling that.
This was the most wanted thing about women for me to enjoy of them and developing some relationships with some women.
Now this is happening.(about 3 weeks)

This aura of high value non-neediness self-actualized dominant male, are really hitting, but seems not stable yet. I am in %70 of time up and %30 of time down mode.

[tolgaocal80]

stage 5 day 5

dreams started with day 1, first day I was having a girlfriend. I was waiting her after school, I was loving her very much in dream. and then my mom told me she was also attracted to her. In this dream there were too much of emotions, rather then vivid images. I was still feeling that love, warm when I woke up.

last night, I was petting a black cat in my dream. I was caring "her" all things. I cleaned her in bath etc,

And something really grabbed my attention with starting the stage 5, when I take a nap , I am dreaming like real, I mean I am seeing myself as sleeping and waking up but actually I am still sleeping that time,

yesterday, I fell asleep on my couch, when I open my eyes,( in the same position in bed and as the same situation just before I fell asleep) I saw, 2 butterfly in front of me I tried to cath them, but I couldn't. I was thinking what the hll? how they came in the room, and then I woke up and see everything normal. it was so strange.

another time, again I was lying on the couch, fell asleep. I wake up in my dream in same position just before sleeping, and sister come my room told something to me, I was really thinking this happened. but then I really woke up, and went to ask my sister if she came in the my room, but the door was already locked . anyways

I am taking vitamins, zinc, d3 for a long-time. a habit from my fitness days.
Better try to make immun system stronger than struggle with all this shhit.

[tolgaocal80]

"Sleep Magic"

I used again "Sleep Magic" bwe. And, man it is just perfectly working. I am using sleep nap for a long time, it is giving me a wonderfull and strong nap. the other "Sleep Shuttle" thing. it is also perfectly working every time. For a long period of time I was sleeping late night it became a bad habit for me. Last day I want to sleep earlier than I did. and boom just put my headphones on my ears and after 5-10 minutes I slept. soo good for that price.

I will use Self-Esteem 5.5G after that run, my 2 run of AM6 went so good. I almost got all things what the product description page says. stabil mood for now.

[tolgaocal80]

stage 6 day 21

I cant difference changes now for now because of lockdown, I cant go outside for hang etc. Not new inner changes for now.
stage 5-6 are generally had a weaker effect on me than other stages.

After this run I didnt decide what to run? I got SE 5.5G for now and AM.
My primarily thing is AM programming actually. I always want live the life with my own terms and decides,
Actually a year before, I just wanted to find a girlfriend and became a lovable person, but Idk that things doesn't take my attention any more, Now I want my financial freedom, and living life fearless, without regret, and peacefully

If a I do SE, then this means at least 4 months. but in this time I can almost finish next AM run.
I know I am not there yet regarding AM ,
But if SE will help me "a lot" to getting there, I will do SE. Maybe SE could make things fast to get there. I am confused .
and I got some suspicion, If I do SE, between AM runs, can SE make fade AM programming in that time? (because of newer technology)

[tolgaocal80]

Stage 6 Day 32+1

here is a short summary of the entire improvements from Run 1 and Run-2
12-16 hours ocean masked. 4-6 hours on headset.

I copied and listed this statements from AM descriptions page. I will put the percent of how I see myself about these statements. These are the results of run-1 and 2 together. and most of these statements didn't start from 0 for me, they started mostly sub zero.

• Be easily able and willing to walk away from people and situations you don’t like, and TELL HER NO — whether it’s to her asking for sex or anything else. 80-90 STABILE.

• Exude an aura of confidence, commanding presence and authority, which gets you respect, attention and obedience. 70-80 MOSTLY ALL THE TIME. STABILE.

• No longer seek approval from others, nor be concerned with what they think of you or what you do or say. 80-90 STABILE.

• No longer be, or come across to others as “needy”. 80

• Be unaffected by rejection. 70


• Treat women as people to enjoy the company of, without taking them too seriously, needing them, or being easily upset by them. 70

• Have released expectations towards women, which often lead to bad choices, actions, attitudes, thinking and responses. 70

• Display the attitude, thinking, actions and speech patterns of an Alpha Male. 70

• Be a better, higher and more refined quality of man. 65

• Have let go of any negative self image, attitudes, thoughts and beliefs about yourself. 60

• Have a powerful, positive sense of self respect, self esteem, self image and self worth.60

• Take good care of yourself, your hygiene and your appearance, not just because you want to be attractive to beautiful women, but because it makes you feel good about yourself. 60

• Be selective about whom you spend your time with, and which women you give your time, interest and affections to. 60

• Be entirely unconcerned about “getting the girl” or achieving sexual interaction, which will make the ladies perceive you as higher status, higher value, and more worthy of both. 60

• Exude an aura of sexiness that makes you much more attractive to the beautiful women you encounter. The more beautiful they are, the more attracted and interested they will be. 60-70

• Have a Zen attitude, which keeps you calm when other guys would lose control, thus demonstrating your self control and mastery of the situation – an Alpha male trait. 50-60

• Display graceful, confident body language, which broadcasts your power and dominance to all, but especially females (for whom body language is a very important way of communicating, and thus determining the men they are interested in). 50-60

• Be entirely comfortable in social situations of any type, whether they are familiar to you or not.50

• Be self sufficient and self reliant mentally, emotionally and otherwise. 50

• Have unshakable self confidence.50

• Be your own man, who does what he wants, when he wants, how he wants, where he wants. 50

• Develop and display a fantastic sense of humor, which will make you socially popular and attractive to others, especially beautiful women. 40

• Be in complete control of yourself and your environment, and YOU will be the one who controls when, how, and with whom you have sex.

• Be in control when dealing with women, and especially beautiful women or women you are interested in. I EXPLAINED BELOW.

• Be able to effortlessly approach any woman you want – and the more attractive you find her, the easier it will be. NOT YET. STILL APPROACH ANXIETY AND UNWILLINGNESS.

Plus:
• now, I got some intuition or Idk this word, in every conversation I had with other people, I know exactly what they really mean, and how to respond that. when talking to a girl, a feeling or some thoughts comes in my mind and guiding me for a good answer.
• I just don't care, what others say about me, really, not even a feeling.


But there are somethings still unsolven. and I really should deal with these.
About women, love, and money. the well-known threesome.

on women side,
I raised by a very controller mother and relativetly weak father. and my mom was "always saying about how it is a bad thing to have a relationship with a girl or having a girlfriend. or any kind of sexual encounters."
I guess, this is the my primaly issue when dealing with women, because I really dont have any attraction problem.
but I just dont want them when they come to me. I want a girlfriend but when someone came I just back off. Some of girls offered me sex, really,. but I didn't want. So this is a real problem for me, ofcourse for now. I dont blaming mother or father, things just did happened and, the past can't be changed. I am not in a self-pity mode. I will solve this problem.


after this, I will run SE. for a block. then go back to AM. I wish 6G come quicker than expected. There are so many things I want. AM has an effect on me like LTU. I really appreciated this AM sub. it is like LTU for men plus masculinity.
see you later, on my SE journal.

[GreekGod22]

@tolgaocal80 Are you running AM6 again in 2021?
Saw it in your signature.

[tolgaocal80]

yes stage 7, it will be finished about one week