Funky's Journal - The Year of DMSI - V3.1 - Starting Fresh

[CatMan]

Come on guys, rule 4!

http://subliminal-talk.com/thread-4807-p...#pid131095

[Shannon]

It's all fun and games 'till someone takes it too far and Shannon throws a spear through them as they're running away.

[Life]

Shannon speaking in third person is never good

[Benjamin]

If you're gonna throw a spear at catman then please don't hurt the cat he's holding in the picture!

[Shannon]

If you're gonna throw a spear at catman then please don't hurt the cat he's holding in the picture!

"Kitties are the only good things."

[Funky Trunks]

Ahhh a nice wake up surprise to download the new DMSI.

Will begin the new journey with A tonight and run for 1 month before analysing my situation and assessing my feelings to run B in January. Will keep you all posted about anything out of the ordinary or a shift in mindset in the coming weeks.

I'm feeling optimistic and excited about the healing aspect. I desperately want to get rid of the negative thought loops in situations and, of course, the freezing up stuff also.

No turning back now. Onwards and upwards.

[Funky Trunks]

Have ran DMSI for 4 nights now on US as I can't sleep with the masked tracks so sadly no hybrid for me just now. A few observations to note:

Every night I have had those vivid, intense dreams of women approaching me and sex dreams. Last night's dream felt so real I was a bit delusional when I woke up from it, not to mention absolutely gutted as the girl I was with was absolutely my type. Funnily enough, the dream ended with my Dad bursting into my room and shouting shocked that what we were doing was wrong and in his house too. I wonder if there is some deeper meaning to that...

I've been having a strong inclination to take up dance lessons. To learn Tango or Salsa. I did a bit of Salsa years ago and loved it, so maybe DMSI has brought up these dormant feelings. Not to mention it's as close as you can get to sex with a woman without actually doing it.

Also, just a thought, seeing as I froze with all those women around me in my OP experience in the club maybe I'm being moved in a direction of where if I'm confident enough to know some real dance moves maybe it'll force me to act upon making a move on the dance floor, through dancing! Or maybe I'm looking too much into that.

Finally, I'm absolutely beasting the gym just now and I've noticed that I'm looking stronger, fitter and leaner. I attribute this to running DMSI in general, not just V3. I finally seem to be getting beyond the stagnation and developing further through the same training programme I've been running for the past 4 years. So thanks for that push.

This weekend will be my first opportunity to report on a night out since that last time so we'll see how it goes on my next report!

[Funky Trunks]

Almost 2 weeks into V3 and I have some subtle self-effects to report. I definitely feel I have a more confident manner about me when talking with other people. My eye contact is as strong as it's ever been and talking with other people doesn't faze me, especially with good looking women. It's like a subtle sense of power and I can tell the other person can feel it. I also have less desire to go out and drink with friends, I'd much rather get my sleep and travel around visiting local towns and villages instead in my free time. I don't know what to make of this - is it my subconscious playing with me knowing that I probably won't meet women this way and knows it? Or, maybe I'm just realising there is more to life than going out and drinking with friends. Obviously, a good benefit of this has been my consistency with my training so that's been good.

I have made big plans for next year. I'm going to make next year a year of travel and life experiences and I am going to take up a new hobby - maybe dancing or photography. I'm also seriously still considering the dating coach route to perhaps give me that kick up the arse but I shall wait awhile before deciding that.

I've changed up my listening situation from my iPad speakers full blast volume to my JBL bluetooth speaker at -50db at a volume where the crackly noise isn't so noticable. I can feel the difference between the 2 speakers.

Had my first sex dream in a while last night. 2 girls were chasing me, kissing me and engaging in sex with me (it's always 2 girls for some reason) and, interestingly, an old flame from last year - who lives in another country - messaged me this morning telling me she had a sex dream about me. I have never had a message like that before so I doubt that it's coincidental.

On the flip side, I've been having a lot of memories randomly pop into my head of times where I failed with women, or been embarrassed and so forth. I'm guessing that has something to do with clearing so hopefully it's doing its magic.

[Benjamin]

Maybe that's actually what you enjoy more and you can meet women doing that. For example i've never liked clubs but I always forced myself to go. As i've become more connected in myself i've much preferred to do things during the day.

[Funky Trunks]

Maybe that's actually what you enjoy more and you can meet women doing that. For example i've never liked clubs but I always forced myself to go. As i've become more connected in myself i've much preferred to do things during the day.

Yeah, it's very possible this is the case. I've also noticed I feel fresher and more alert at the beginning of the week when I call it a night early at the weekend. As long as I'm doing something during the day I keep myself happy.

With that being said, I've been feeling really restless and irritable all weekend and my mind has been running a thousand miles per hour at night thinking about all sorts of bad things, predominantly with my parents age and death and fear of being alone as I have a terribly small family.

Strangely, I haven't thought about women at all really this weekend and had no dreams, desire or anything really to do with them. I just want the week to hurry up so I can get home for Christmas.

[Funky Trunks]

Sorry guys, don't want to be reporting negativity but just in that last hour or so of posting the above ^ I was on the verge of having an anxiety attack. I'm still surprised and body is shaking so I'll be brief as I'm not sure if it's worth posting this or not but will do in case anyone has something similar.

I think maybe it was a clash of energies between DMSI and caffeine. I had my normal 2 cups before the gym but I felt like it was too much right after the second one. Cue me arriving into my workout with several attractive women and anxiety flooded my body. Felt like a tidal wave of negative emotion. Not just that but a range of negative emotions, angry at the girl checking me out for making me feel like this (ridiculous) and despair at the thought of not being able to do anything about it. Heart pumping and just wanted to get the hell out of there, but I closed my eyes and made myself finish my work out. Couldn't look any of the girls in the eyes though, was the complete opposite of being sexy. I've not had that flooding feeling of anxiety in years and never want it again. I have no doubt the caffeine had a large part to play but it was just my normal, everyday dose and have never felt like this with it before. Probably my weekend feelings also contributed.

At the moment I just feel empty and that horrible sinking feeling in my stomach. Not hungry at all but eating something might help so will try and force something down. I need this to go away in time for work later.

Never mind, I know it won't last and at least I managed to find some strength in me to finish my workout.

Apologies again for the bad vibes.

[Zeroxmachina]

Sorry guys, don't want to be reporting negativity but just in that last hour or so of posting the above ^ I was on the verge of having an anxiety attack. I'm still surprised and body is shaking so I'll be brief as I'm not sure if it's worth posting this or not but will do in case anyone has something similar.

I think maybe it was a clash of energies between DMSI and caffeine. I had my normal 2 cups before the gym but I felt like it was too much right after the second one. Cue me arriving into my workout with several attractive women and anxiety flooded my body. Felt like a tidal wave of negative emotion. Not just that but a range of negative emotions, angry at the girl checking me out for making me feel like this (ridiculous) and despair at the thought of not being able to do anything about it. Heart pumping and just wanted to get the hell out of there, but I closed my eyes and made myself finish my work out. Couldn't look any of the girls in the eyes though, was the complete opposite of being sexy. I've not had that flooding feeling of anxiety in years and never want it again. I have no doubt the caffeine had a large part to play but it was just my normal, everyday dose and have never felt like this with it before. Probably my weekend feelings also contributed.

At the moment I just feel empty and that horrible sinking feeling in my stomach. Not hungry at all but eating something might help so will try and force something down. I need this to go away in time for work later.

Never mind, I know it won't last and at least I managed to find some strength in me to finish my workout.

Apologies again for the bad vibes.

I don't know how many of the people in this forum have had experience with different healing modalities, but part of healing is sometimes experiencing the emotion of whatever it is that needs to be healed before it can be released. It will pass. : )

[Blink]

This article was posted some time ago on the forum. Give it a read. It should help you look at you current situation from a different perspective. Hope it helps calm you down as well

[RTBoss]

I'm experiencing a lot of anxiety as well. I haven't had it for ages, and since running version A, it's back.

Shannon said previous versions had "clearing," but not "healing." This version includes scripting for "healing." I can't help but feel bringing up things that cause anxiety are part of that.