Overcoming Fear 1.1 Journal

[SurferJoy]

Day 1

I bough it last night. I listened to the Ultra Sonic on speakers while sleeping.

I had a dream several vivid dreams.

Dream 1 - >Fear of abandonment / losing the ones I love

I met this young woman. We quickly got attached to each other.
At some point, we decide to go in a park. There is a huge slide. She wants to try it. I'm worried because it is so huge and it doesnt have side protection.
She doesn't care and she is not afraid. As she begin sliding, she unfortunately fell off the slide very high. Her body lies on the ground unmoving. I immediately try to revive her and I also call an ambulance.
I also take her phone and call the people in her contact list for help.
But, it is very clear that she is dead.


Dream 2 -> Her I'm having a perfect relationship with a woman (different that one in previous dream). This dream seems to take place at the exact same location as th previous dream.


Dream 3 -> I'm at the bank to solve a problem. There is a mistake in my bank book. They have my right address but under a wrong name. I'm very annoyed because everything goes incredibly slow.

[Shin]

Is this you first sub?

[SurferJoy]

[align=center]

Is this you first sub?

No, its not my first sub

Day 2

Money

One difficult for many people to build real wealth is problem related to survival. The fear to lose it all, followed by a certain death.

When I use releasing method such as the Sedona method or even EFT. These deep fears always come up but I always had a hard time to let them go. There is a childish desire to be protected by fear and that the alternative is much worse.
Anyway, to tackle this fear, I decided to work with the OF sub. Thats one more tool in the arsenal. I don't think, I can make much progress with such a fear.

Be happy beforehand and the world will magnify your happiness.
The only secret of success is: Be successful before the world proves you that you are successful. frederick Dodson - Prosperity Consciousness

Women

It is my belief that you do not attract what you hate or fear. I have done so-so to OK, attracting women. But, I'm sure I could do much better. Last year, I did an experiment and I did releasing on a statement about sending love to women.

It was very hard because there was really a lot of fear, disapproval and hatred. But after intense sessions, it finally worked for just one day, I was totally glowing with love toward women. It felt very intense. There was no attachment , lust, no desire in it. It was pure. It felt like my whole body was in a state of orgasm and joy although it was not sexual in nature.

During that particular day, girls I haven't heard from years contacted me.
One girl I havent heard since 2012 posted on my Facebook wall a pic where we are together in Benidorm.
Another girl, I havent heard since 2011 !! contacted me on Twitter to excuse herself back in 2011, I was supposed to go to Barcelona with her on holiday but suddenly she disappear without a trace.
2 more girls, I havent heard since 2010 I added me on LinkedIn.

Another one, invited me to stay with her family in Southern France. I accepted that offer and within days I was there in France with her.

Overtime fear and disapproval came back, AM6 does little in that department. Right now, I'm still releasing with a similar statement to appreciate and love women however 'fear/hate' is the biggest block and its hard to get around it. I started to use OF yesterday, I hope it does help with all of this.

I really like this post from a guy called Jake, he came to similar conclusion than I.

What image pops in your mind when someone says the word "Women"?

I know for me personally, being that i spent a solid 4 years engrossed in the ideas of the community before deciding to step away from that area and I'm sure most of my readers from that background can relate to this, the image that popped into my head for a long long time, was a very negative one.

This is understandable. We are constantly bombarded by negative images from the media, whether it be movies, TV, magazines and other formats that to "some" degree, women either do not like men, dislike male attention, are uninterested in meeting new people or are taken. In the community, though I do not frequently read any information anymore that comes out of that venue, but back in the day I can remember one of the biggest images/beliefs that I had installed in my mind was the idea of "pussy power". What this was, it was the belief that women flaunted their sexuality in order to manipulate or control men, and all they wanted was control and weren't interested in friendships, sex, relationships, or anything natural/human. I mean looking back on it, it's pretty laughable, but the mind is an interesting thing, and being that I was young and unable to distinguish (come up with my own opinion) I just accepted well if this guy says it's so, and he's an expert, well it must be so.

Well it didn't take long for me to start finding evidence to support that belief, and if anyone has heard any of my interviews, I unfortunately (or maybe I should say fortunately, looking at the long term effects) created a reality, or found myself in circumstances that would prove those beliefs.

This is probably one of the biggest issues, if not the biggest issue when it comes to guys having difficulties in this area. It's just simply having a negative image or belief structure about the opposite sex.

Here's the thing, as long as you have a negative image in your mind of women, well subconsciously women are going to pick up on that.

Or if you want to take it further, as long as your holding a negative image in your mind of women you're going to keep creating that in your experience or you're going to keep dreaming up experiences that correlate to that image.

So how do you knock it out? Well you just let it go that's all. When I first figured this out, I just simply wanted to be happy with myself and my life, so I just changed what these circumstances meant to me. From that point on, I was no longer holding a negative image in my mind that brought up the thoughts "There is something wrong with me." or "I'm not good enough." and instead made it mean, "I'm awesome". You can do it that way.

Another way is just let it go, let go of the ill emotions, as in just accept it. Hold the image in mind and keep accepting it over and over and over again until the image changes. If you no longer have negative emotions towards it, well the image has to change. I'm a big fan Lester Levenson and Larry Crane, and one of the techniques Larry Crane uses is he just says to let go of any dissapproval towards women and give them approval, and eventually instead of the negative image, you'll see them either smiling and being happy. That's a great technique as well.

Another way you could do it is just by using affirmations. "I absolutely love women and everything about them, and they absolutely and unconditionally love me." or something along those lines.

Because, I use Sedona style statement , the statement I use is simpler and shorter:

"I allow myself to deeply love women"

[LionKing]

Good post! I meant to comment, but didn't want to clutter your journal, so I wrote the long version on mine HERE. Comment if you like :)

[SurferJoy]

Day 3

OF is good to induce vivid dreams. I had this scary vivid dream, where I was failing an exam every single year for a straight 20 years.
hmm...
It was followed by another more pleasant vivid dream where I had a strong friendship with a woman. She was a flight attendant or something like this.

This aside, today I noticed a positive development I'm consciously starting to detach from my drama ( anger, negativity, fear, etc...)

I see it from a distance and I imagine that I'm not these things but simply the observer. One mistake its to identify with drama as in 'I'm afraid' instead of 'I feel afraid'

I began a new process of basically let in go of being in a reactive mode.

[SurferJoy]

Day 4

I had a string of nightmares last night, all charged with fear and anxieties hehehe

Today, I noticed some results from my releasing on negativity toward women and even toward myself.

I had a sense of safety about my future. I had also a lot less the feeling of being excluded.
During certain moments, I had burst of appreciation toward some of my female friends.
When I walked in the street, I felt more present and relaxed.

Usually in the past, when I work with the Goal process from the Sedona Method, it takes about 45 to 60 days to see real solid changes.


I remember back in 2012, I worked with the affirmation "I allow myself to be able to seduce any girl I want"
It worked great, It got me girls that are still in my life to this day.

But I realized that a seducer lifestyle its not what I wanted....
I remember I approached these 2 Australian students. It was easy to charm and entertain them. But, deep down, I didn't like these girls.
It was like being a PUA. Many PUAs don't like women and they end up feeling depressed and resentful.

What the affirmation did for me, it created a reality where I was able to easily approach any girls I wanted regardless of my mood.
I approached many girls in the streets, bars and clubs etc....
It was easy but eventually deep down I still had a lot of negativity and disapproval.
At one point, one of my friend challenged me to approach a "total 10" in a club. He chooses the girl for me. I did approach her and to my surprise it worked great, she was initially even more attracted to me than I was to her. We stayed in contact for a month or so, but alas my negativity got the best of me.

I have no idea what will be the outside result of the affirmation I'm currently using. It is really a surprise journey, we will see

[SurferJoy]

Day 8

I had a terrifying nightmare the other night but it was also unbelievable.
In the nightmare I just lost everything but then I'm not the sort of guy who lose everything. At least, I do not believe that.

I told to myself it cannot be true. I shouted that loudly it cannot be true and I woke up within the dream. I was lucid.
I shouted one more time, It cannot be true then I finally woke up for good.
I had a sense that the dream was at least semi real so I had to do something about the sense of loss. Very disturbing night.
I had also a lot of repressed anger coming out during the past few days.

But today, I feel slightly better.

[koshas]

Day 4

I had a string of nightmares last night, all charged with fear and anxieties hehehe

Today, I noticed some results from my releasing on negativity toward women and even toward myself.

I had a sense of safety about my future. I had also a lot less the feeling of being excluded.
During certain moments, I had burst of appreciation toward some of my female friends.
When I walked in the street, I felt more present and relaxed.

Usually in the past, when I work with the Goal process from the Sedona Method, it takes about 45 to 60 days to see real solid changes.


I remember back in 2012, I worked with the affirmation "I allow myself to be able to seduce any girl I want"
It worked great, It got me girls that are still in my life to this day.

But I realized that a seducer lifestyle its not what I wanted....
I remember I approached these 2 Australian students. It was easy to charm and entertain them. But, deep down, I didn't like these girls.
It was like being a PUA. Many PUAs don't like women and they end up feeling depressed and resentful.

What the affirmation did for me, it created a reality where I was able to easily approach any girls I wanted regardless of my mood.
I approached many girls in the streets, bars and clubs etc....
It was easy but eventually deep down I still had a lot of negativity and disapproval.
At one point, one of my friend challenged me to approach a "total 10" in a club. He chooses the girl for me. I did approach her and to my surprise it worked great, she was initially even more attracted to me than I was to her. We stayed in contact for a month or so, but alas my negativity got the best of me.

I have no idea what will be the outside result of the affirmation I'm currently using. It is really a surprise journey, we will see

I am struggling with this same issue with negativity towards women.its more of subconscious beliefs.and some rather messed up life experiences.it has gotten a lot better since I started this sub journey ,but I am not where I want to be yet.

[SurferJoy]

Day 4

......
I have no idea what will be the outside result of the affirmation I'm currently using. It is really a surprise journey, we will see

I am struggling with this same issue with negativity towards women.its more of subconscious beliefs.and some rather messed up life experiences.it has gotten a lot better since I started this sub journey ,but I am not where I want to be yet.

What sub do you use Koshas?

Day 10

I had to shoot a video for my youtube channel. I wasn't familiar with the topic so I had a bit of anxiety.
But then I was able to do it very easily with no stress/anxiety at all. I'm happy with that I hope this trend will continue to grow.

I also noticed that when I'm in the street women who met my eyes, held eyes contact or at least they do not look away in avoidance mode like before. At least, 3 of them smiled at me after they held eyes contact for longer than 2 sec.

[koshas]

My sub history is am5-Ephra-am6-currently on stage 3 wm2

[SurferJoy]

My sub history is am5-Ephra-am6-currently on stage 3 wm2

This is great, I wish you had a public journal about your WM2 journey. Not many WM2 journals around here

[koshas]

I might give an update or testimonial.I can see the benefit of keeping a journal.Its good to track your results and look at your thinking and beliefs.

I have posted a couple of times on other threads about wm2.

I am very busy right now starting a new workshop that is going to take all my extra time.for the next 3 months.

I can say it works,but you need to be congruent and take action.I have been getting more attention from women.Some not really wanted lol

[SurferJoy]

Long due update on my journey.

Ok, I was doing two things releasing on issues I have around women using the Sedona method/releasing technique and I was listening to the OF 1.1 sub.

Thats it.

In October, I was at the beach then came this girl. She was really nice and we spend the day together. She said it was her last day here and she had to take her plane tonight. During the evening, we went to a quiet beach at a bar.
There she said she got butterflies in her belly and she feels strong attraction for me. She cancelled her flight and stayed with me for a few more days.
She also called her boyfriend to told him that she is going to start to see me and she asked for an open relationship. He later declined and she broke up with him.
She stayed with me but I couldn't listen to the sub while we were spending all of our time together .
Thats was October. In November, I went to some island for scuba diving there in the boat, I met a stunning russian blondie. We quickly became friends , we took a lot of pics together. However, it was harder to speak with her , she doesnt speak well any of the language I speak .

In December, I met another girl, she is a fashion model. The style you see in magazine like Vogue. On her Twitter account, she says to the world, how great I'm .....

Right now, I yet met another stunning girl that I'm going to do a bit of travel with.

I believe I'm doing great with my releasing program. it is not yet over.
I found out the core issue of all of this , its self-worth.

If at your core, you know deeply that you are worthy to be loved by a beautiful woman, you will no longer pursue all those things that you believe you need to get them attracted to you.

I do not listen any sub at this moment. I'm not sure what sub could support my effort. I got in my library LTU, OF, AOS, AM6, NSFM and BIABW.
I found that releasing feeling around self-worth also help slowly but surely to remove fear. So I stopped working with OF.

[CatMan]

Wow...

I've wondered where you went as I loved your journal about OF and referred to it often.

WHAT a post. I'm very happy for you, you've made it. You are, where all of us aspire to be.

Good for you.

Maybe someday...I can join you.