02-13-2016, 12:08 AM
(02-12-2016, 12:40 AM)LionKing Wrote: "50 men, and made myself vulnerable and shared where i'm at in my journey, and what i struggle with"? Wow, I can imagine that must've been pretty great! Really sounding good.
"nice guy", but she said she was nervous about meeting you. The platonic type of "nice guy" you're thinking doesn't make women nervous. But of course still avoid being too boyfriendy so she won't associate you with that too much.
I am a nice guy as well, and I used to hate it when I thought I need to act like an asshole in order to not have women attach to me too much so I could continue happily dating whoever I please. You don't need to be like that, BUT you gotta have no shame/fear/quilt of being honest with her, and of dating multiple women. Having issues around those makes you become "closed" about them, which makes you avoid expression when they come up, which makes you possibly supplicate and/or lead them on, which makes for bad feelings for you both down the road. Ask me how I know. But sorry, not preaching, its just something that's been really clicking into place for me lately.
yeah man! i do believe in being upfront with the women. If I knowingly put a woman in a position to be hurt just so I can have a little piece of her, that's wrong and totally NOT alpha. I must be willing to risk not moving forward with her to avoid paying the cost of putting her in a position to be hurt. there's plenty of other women anyway.
so we went out to a rave tonight, where it was a group setting... some of my friends showed up and some of her friends showed up... she was all over me when she was around, but she was freaking glued to the bar getting shot after shot, so i hardly got a chance to really interact with her. But I was having a perfectly good time dancing with my own group of friends that I just didn't give a flying rat's ass... In fact, I spent my time more productively, by interacting with a beautiful hispanic girl who was wearing a sexy pikachu costume that I had just met while I was there and dancing with her. here's the kicker: i had no approach anxiety introducing myself to this stunningly gorgeous woman. i even met some new people in this setting and really enjoyed myself, and found another guy who loves to dance like I do, and talked to him for quite a while. we'll be seeing each other soon. I will soon meet his friends, and hopefully there's a couple nice girls I can meet through his network! =) I've been to countless raves before, and I write about it all the time in my journals, as they're great testing grounds for pheromones and subliminals for me. I felt FAR MORE comfortable in my own skin than I ever have before. I felt like I was at home. My eyes still wander quite a bit, though.
I catch myself constantly looking to see who's watching me (yeah i know i'm a great dancer so i wanna see which girls are looking ), and plus i'm a self proclaimed attention junkie... i don't know if that's necessarily related to a fear of mine, though. since I tend to do this just as much as before, giving me either 2 possibilities I can think of: 1) It doesn't stem from a fear of being unimportant or 2)It's a deep rooted fear that's so deep that OF5g hasn't scratched the surface yet.
whatever it is, we'll see.
back to the multiple partners ordeal... I've been exploring polyamory as a possible "label" to my evolving taste in love. i'm finding it more and more comfortable to identify myself as polyamorous, in that love and affection can be shown to multiple partners, in an OPEN and HONEST manner. not 3somes or orgy's or anything like that, but openly having multiple partners at any given time, and allowing each partner the liberty to do the same. although that doesn't mean i'll grab any ass that comes my way, i still have a screening process that is evolving constantly as I grow myself.
so yeah lionking, you're not being preachy at all i appreciate and encourage your feedback and thanks for commenting.
=)