02-09-2016, 06:22 PM
Day 11:
I feel so angry I could kill somebody right now. For the last couple of days Ive had this energy stirring up in me. I keeep having these thoughts of someone pissing me off and me just raging on them.
A lady served me at the cafe this morning and she was being generally friendly, saying hello, asking me questions and I was so blunt, didn't respond to half of the things she said. I was not in the mood, and what was weird was I didnt care whether or not I was rude. Usually I'm trying to be all nice and lovely even when Im feeling shit. I guess thats fear based conditioning from childhood.
Whats interesting is the biggest reason for me suppressing my emotions around others is a fear that ill be abandoned. Im happy to let that go!
I feel so angry I could kill somebody right now. For the last couple of days Ive had this energy stirring up in me. I keeep having these thoughts of someone pissing me off and me just raging on them.
A lady served me at the cafe this morning and she was being generally friendly, saying hello, asking me questions and I was so blunt, didn't respond to half of the things she said. I was not in the mood, and what was weird was I didnt care whether or not I was rude. Usually I'm trying to be all nice and lovely even when Im feeling shit. I guess thats fear based conditioning from childhood.
Whats interesting is the biggest reason for me suppressing my emotions around others is a fear that ill be abandoned. Im happy to let that go!
