Blink's AM6 Journal - Complete Run

[Blink]

Hey guys,

This report is overdue. Done with Stage 5 and already 10 days into Stage 6. All I can say is that this stage was hell to me. I was depressed and tired most of the time. I'll keep this short and summarize the main points.

Overall time spent was around 500 hours, 225 masked and 275 silent. That's around 15 hours a day on average, ranging between 8 to 20 hours a day.

The good stuff.

• Social circle manifestation was very obvious. Met new friends to go out with. Too bad they're leaving the country in about a month's time. An old friend emailed me out of the blue. And met some old friends when I was out at a bar.
  
• Two random guys started talking to me while on the street. And they weren't seem crazy or asking for something or anything like that
  
• Had around 3-4 dreams that I can recall that seemed to deal with fear. In the dreams, I was facing some fearful situations, which I was very comfortable with.
  
• I was called hot a couple of times, by guys and girls.
  
• For a while, I was noticing more people looking at me.
  
• I started making my bed everyday.
  
• Gym with subs is way better! I tried with and without them, just to check, and I can say my lifts were stronger with them. It could be placebo, or false judgement, but it's a better experience for sure!
  
• I picked up a girl. She's very cute and we still are together, although the relationship feels a little shaky right now. It's been a bit more than a month. I picked her up after 2 days in Stage 5 I think.
  
• Approach anxiety seems to have been dealt with. The first approach was always difficult to pull out, although some of the reactions were pretty good. But after the first, building momentum was really easy. I did all of them after a couple of drinks tho. Something that needs to be mentioned
  
• No masturbation and no porn streak still going strong. It feels like something that I will never go back to, although I still get strong urges real bad sometimes. I broke my hard mode promise to myself tho. I was on hard mode for about 60 days in total, and it's already 90 days without masturbation and porn.
  

Now for the bad stuff

• Tons of resistance. Depression and tiredness throughout. This could be related to the more time spent with masked subs compared to previous stages.
  
• Lots of sleepless night. I can remember 5 at least. And by sleepless I mean a maximum of 2 hours of sleep...
  
• I was getting emotional and reactive to the smallest, most trivial things...
  
• Trying to control everything, and not being able to obviously, which was making my mood even worse.
  
• Tons of jealousy and insecurities surfacing.
  
• I felt like quitting more than once.
  

Stage 6 already feels calmer, but that's for another report!