RERUN 3 AM5

[aswase]

stage 5 day 5,
Anxiety.. just a little at the end of the day for some reason.
Ive been contemplating some issues which I haven't aggressively been attacking lately.
Due to my lifestyle, I get every food vitamin/mineral/salt/molecule in more than sufficient quantities, as well as pro hormones from food... except low calories.
Im never really hungry, so ill go weeks into a deficit without even noticing, but currently im going to make calories my focus.
Ive dropped down to very low bf, lost a little muscle, and my thinking has become.. erratic. Atleast, when I do think. Anxiety.. im thinking thats also from not eating enough, and a little from not enough sleep, but ill work around it.
I think its a reason as to why ive been such a loner for quite some time too. Food brings people together. Healthy or not; and Ive been neglecting it for too long.
My goal is actually to reach double digit fat %, and to eat as much calories as I can to re-jumpstart my system, even if its force fed.

Also. Ive been asking a lot more questions to people lately. From my science side, its from the low serotonin in my system from low body fat. Thats my consensus, and ill start from fixing that. >3000 calories a day.

Soon after, Ill go back to searching for a mentor aggressively.

Other than that, life is great. I just got a number from a cute girl, and invited her to go hiking with me and some friends this weekend. It'll be awesome. She ended up saying no, and didn't give another day or time though, so I guess she isn't interested for whatever reason.. Im fine with that Ill go look for someone else who's interested.
And another thing.
I cant stop saying awesome at least in the very least, three times a day. I never used to use that word, but.. That really stood out to me for some reason. Its my usual response to how I feel about everything lately. I kind of like it. Now I just need to work on having more detailed opinions other than just "good", or "awesome".