08-27-2015, 07:34 PM
==First 32 days done==
The first 32 days are done. I don't know what to focus on, since during this first month with ASC my life has been a Splash Mountain but with muddy water.
I started on a prescription of Prozac for anti-depression yesterday and started school today. My one-itis has a class with me again this semester (in the spring we had three classes together because she desperately wanted to be in my classes, and with my help she passed all three) and chose to sit next to me again even though I left things really badly with her over the summer. She seems to want to still be friends but also it still feels like she wants to use me; I keep my conversations with her to a minimum now because she keeps making excuses about various things and trying to one-up me in the "whose life is worse contest" (I admit it's partly my fault for indulging in such a topic), but part of me still wants her in my life.
My financial situation is terrible (posted earlier), I'm in dire straits and would like to know if it's within forum rules to ask here for donations to my Paypal. (boldfaced to highlight). Given my programming abilities I've been referred to a few "code bounty" sites like Top Coder by a few people I know in other places as a way to potentially earn money, but I've found that many of the problems with few to no attempts at them on sites like those are above my current abilities, and the ones that could be within my abilities have already been spoken for.
On the flip side, I seem to be paying more attention to people, men and women, when they're speaking to me, focusing on their faces (especially the eyes) while they speak and if I'm sitting I seem to feel more comfortable with them the longer the conversation goes. I don't know how to feel about that because I usually feel my life is crap right now with my lack of timely positive results and impending financial doom and the dissonance is relatively new to me. Am I finally starting to be more present in my interactions with people?
The first 32 days are done. I don't know what to focus on, since during this first month with ASC my life has been a Splash Mountain but with muddy water.
I started on a prescription of Prozac for anti-depression yesterday and started school today. My one-itis has a class with me again this semester (in the spring we had three classes together because she desperately wanted to be in my classes, and with my help she passed all three) and chose to sit next to me again even though I left things really badly with her over the summer. She seems to want to still be friends but also it still feels like she wants to use me; I keep my conversations with her to a minimum now because she keeps making excuses about various things and trying to one-up me in the "whose life is worse contest" (I admit it's partly my fault for indulging in such a topic), but part of me still wants her in my life.
My financial situation is terrible (posted earlier), I'm in dire straits and would like to know if it's within forum rules to ask here for donations to my Paypal. (boldfaced to highlight). Given my programming abilities I've been referred to a few "code bounty" sites like Top Coder by a few people I know in other places as a way to potentially earn money, but I've found that many of the problems with few to no attempts at them on sites like those are above my current abilities, and the ones that could be within my abilities have already been spoken for.
On the flip side, I seem to be paying more attention to people, men and women, when they're speaking to me, focusing on their faces (especially the eyes) while they speak and if I'm sitting I seem to feel more comfortable with them the longer the conversation goes. I don't know how to feel about that because I usually feel my life is crap right now with my lack of timely positive results and impending financial doom and the dissonance is relatively new to me. Am I finally starting to be more present in my interactions with people?
A Better Alex (ISTJ): EPRHA → ASC → AM6 → …
A Sexy Alex (ESTJ-T): BIABWS+DAOS → DMSI → …
A Better Alex (ENFJ-T): AM6 → …
A Sexy Alex (ESTJ-T): BIABWS+DAOS → DMSI → …
A Better Alex (ENFJ-T): AM6 → …
