Thanks to subs and previous self imporvement I've been able to act completely relaxed and normal around my dad. Mainly because of my zen mindset I've adopted over the passed several months. My dad still gives me tone when we're on the phone or even face to face so I give him tone back but I've been able to balance it out mixing that tone with a more relaxed I could care less kind of tone. That's the best way I can describe it and he doesn't flip his shit about it. In the past he'd say "YOU DON'T GIVE ME THAT TONE BOY." or something along those lines. I usually get aggravated as well with him as soon as he's giving me tone and he can sense that. When we're face to face he can tell much more easily and he stops and controls himself. In the past he wouldn't let me get away with that behavior because of the amount of power he always thought he had over me. Sure he has some power over me now but it's more just like 1% more. Just because he's my dad. But I don't put up with his shit anymore. I'm tired of it. God knows what he would have done 10 years ago if I felt this same way.
I think things have changed for the better mainly due to the fact that I glare into his eyes now. I never used to.. I could barely ever look at him because of this trauma he caused me. I would hate facing him.. even talking to him back in the day. this went on throughout high school. I've always had the utmost respect for him but I was also afraid of him. Only in the last couple of years I've been able to release any and all fear and anger regarding my dad. I love him now.
I think things have changed for the better mainly due to the fact that I glare into his eyes now. I never used to.. I could barely ever look at him because of this trauma he caused me. I would hate facing him.. even talking to him back in the day. this went on throughout high school. I've always had the utmost respect for him but I was also afraid of him. Only in the last couple of years I've been able to release any and all fear and anger regarding my dad. I love him now.
