10-23-2014, 03:21 PM
@Shannon
Apparently one time was enough. I think I scared her a bit because she didn't talk to me for a couple of days. Now we just keep the conversation short and simple.
Stage 2
Day 9
I have been feeling very tired lately. Even typing this is exhausting but I have something to say.
This is going to be embarrassing to admit but for the last few days I have been trying to get over this limerence. It's really got a grip on me. The good news is that reality settles in more often for me which is a good thing. I just wish it would go away. Actually I thought I had it taken care of months ago but it's back it's not as bad though so that's another good thing. Earlier today it hit me real hard.I kept having memories of looking into his eyes and for a minute seeing myself in his eyes. Kind of like mirror. Hearing his voice and it feeling like I had known him forever. The whole feeling like time stopped and there is nobody else is around. Blah.... it feels gross typing about it.
I could type some more but I'll leave it at that. I think whatever happened was just a hallucination to make me feel connected to him.
I just want it over. I'm tired of feeling this way.:@
I haven't been in the mood to deal with people lately either. My motivation has dropped but it hasn't went away completely. I haven't been feeling well with the nuasea and weakness. Earlier it felt like something inside of me was dying and that I being separated from something. I still feel it a little.
Watching Avatar the last Airbender is really bringing up a bunch of emotion. It the last two episodes of season 2.
I also think that for the first time ever other people are starting to pick up on me not feeling to upbeat. Usually I'm good at hiding it but lately my boss asked if I was okay and then my mom. Of course my mom asked more often. It's just weird for that to happen and I don't think I'm doing anything different.
I still feel like the sub is still working in the background so I don't doubt it working. I'm just trying to figure out what all of this stuff means. Maybe I just need to let it be, I don't know feeling very confused right now.
Apparently one time was enough. I think I scared her a bit because she didn't talk to me for a couple of days. Now we just keep the conversation short and simple.
Stage 2
Day 9
I have been feeling very tired lately. Even typing this is exhausting but I have something to say.
This is going to be embarrassing to admit but for the last few days I have been trying to get over this limerence. It's really got a grip on me. The good news is that reality settles in more often for me which is a good thing. I just wish it would go away. Actually I thought I had it taken care of months ago but it's back it's not as bad though so that's another good thing. Earlier today it hit me real hard.I kept having memories of looking into his eyes and for a minute seeing myself in his eyes. Kind of like mirror. Hearing his voice and it feeling like I had known him forever. The whole feeling like time stopped and there is nobody else is around. Blah.... it feels gross typing about it.
I could type some more but I'll leave it at that. I think whatever happened was just a hallucination to make me feel connected to him. I just want it over. I'm tired of feeling this way.:@
I haven't been in the mood to deal with people lately either. My motivation has dropped but it hasn't went away completely. I haven't been feeling well with the nuasea and weakness. Earlier it felt like something inside of me was dying and that I being separated from something. I still feel it a little.
Watching Avatar the last Airbender is really bringing up a bunch of emotion. It the last two episodes of season 2.
I also think that for the first time ever other people are starting to pick up on me not feeling to upbeat. Usually I'm good at hiding it but lately my boss asked if I was okay and then my mom. Of course my mom asked more often. It's just weird for that to happen and I don't think I'm doing anything different.
I still feel like the sub is still working in the background so I don't doubt it working. I'm just trying to figure out what all of this stuff means. Maybe I just need to let it be, I don't know feeling very confused right now.
