09-30-2014, 09:19 AM
Stage 1 - Day 6
*I felt happier today even though I haven't sleep since yesterday ....
I also feel pain in my solar plexus but there is no drama/emotions attached to it. It just pain or discomfort.
*I was thinking that if I want to be solid in the way I want to be. I need to come at peace with my own death. There is no real peace for me in being afraid or hiding to myself the fact that someday I will die.
In ancient tribal cultures , they had rites to teach that to help boys to be men.
I will see what I can do about it. I had a meditation about that topic from Hale Dwoskin (Sedona Method) but I never got something out it. At least, something, I could notice.I think I will revisit that one.
@thanks for the feedback about SM and WM. I should have given more background infos about myself before posting. Yes, I m good at socializing and I dont have a problem getting a girlfriend/LTR if I want to and most of my friends are women. I m surrounded by women hence the reason I posted that quote so enthusiastically because it reflects well my situation.
For example, I did well by being liked by two cute girls from Austria (both 22, I'm 38) . They liked me so much that they invited me in their country to stay in their house. Where I met some of their other girlfriends and they also liked me, and now, they are also in my circle.
I seek the alphamaleness that will allow me to jump from a popular loser with girls to someone who get the lays with all those girls that seek my company.
I remember, I invited one girl I recently met someplace at my house to watch a movie. We were on the couch. I could see by her body language that she was attracted but certainly out of lack of courage, alphamaleness, fear of being blamed/rejected. I choose the safety of doing nothing.
So I hope this clarify my position.
*I felt happier today even though I haven't sleep since yesterday ....
I also feel pain in my solar plexus but there is no drama/emotions attached to it. It just pain or discomfort.
*I was thinking that if I want to be solid in the way I want to be. I need to come at peace with my own death. There is no real peace for me in being afraid or hiding to myself the fact that someday I will die.
In ancient tribal cultures , they had rites to teach that to help boys to be men.
I will see what I can do about it. I had a meditation about that topic from Hale Dwoskin (Sedona Method) but I never got something out it. At least, something, I could notice.I think I will revisit that one.
@thanks for the feedback about SM and WM. I should have given more background infos about myself before posting. Yes, I m good at socializing and I dont have a problem getting a girlfriend/LTR if I want to and most of my friends are women. I m surrounded by women hence the reason I posted that quote so enthusiastically because it reflects well my situation.
For example, I did well by being liked by two cute girls from Austria (both 22, I'm 38) . They liked me so much that they invited me in their country to stay in their house. Where I met some of their other girlfriends and they also liked me, and now, they are also in my circle.
I seek the alphamaleness that will allow me to jump from a popular loser with girls to someone who get the lays with all those girls that seek my company.
I remember, I invited one girl I recently met someplace at my house to watch a movie. We were on the couch. I could see by her body language that she was attracted but certainly out of lack of courage, alphamaleness, fear of being blamed/rejected. I choose the safety of doing nothing.
So I hope this clarify my position.
Subs History: BIABW (2014)-> AM (2015) -> OF 4g 1.1 (2015)- > DAOS 4g (90 days - 2016) -> DMSI - > AYPNBL
