06-10-2013, 07:08 AM
(This post was last modified: 06-10-2013, 07:12 AM by AlphaScorpio.)
Day 20 - stage 2: I'm pretty damn sure stage 2 is removing some limiting sexual beliefs/energy or something cause I've had so many dreams about sexual related stuff, Being massaged by a woman, flirting and wanting to have sex, getting angry at a guy who stopped me from having sex and challenging him, tigers (animals of sexuality) etc.
Figured out kinda what the massage dream means, I was sitting in a chair looking out of a window, I was kinda reclining in the chair, this woman comes over and asks me if i want a massage, so i say yes and damn it felt nice!
my interpretation is that I'm opening more oportunities for myself and taking them (window) but I also lack sexual intimacy maybe I need to relax? (massage) the fact that the woman massaging me was my old councillor is intersting too ;p
Yesterday me and this swiss girl who stays with us were watching TV and we were talking, laughing and flirting a little (I still kinda hesitate when it comes to flirting, I guess it's fear of being laughed at or noticed for flirting still feel guilt or shame) but often it doesn't happen that I make a girl laugh so genuinley that she put her hand on my shoulder as she was laughing, I also noticed she was behaving kinda femenine, slightly more than usual... yanno, open and receptive smily and giggly I was like o.0 interesting... hehe.
I want girls damnit! -_-
Also haven't busted a nut in 3 days (on and off nofap), love the feeling in your stomach/sexual organ areas, feeling of being fully loaded LOL. sexual energy is strong.
keep getting hunches that there's a possibility that i'll get laid this year, dunno just a hunch. (18 in november can't wait)
Figured out kinda what the massage dream means, I was sitting in a chair looking out of a window, I was kinda reclining in the chair, this woman comes over and asks me if i want a massage, so i say yes and damn it felt nice!
my interpretation is that I'm opening more oportunities for myself and taking them (window) but I also lack sexual intimacy maybe I need to relax? (massage) the fact that the woman massaging me was my old councillor is intersting too ;p
Yesterday me and this swiss girl who stays with us were watching TV and we were talking, laughing and flirting a little (I still kinda hesitate when it comes to flirting, I guess it's fear of being laughed at or noticed for flirting still feel guilt or shame) but often it doesn't happen that I make a girl laugh so genuinley that she put her hand on my shoulder as she was laughing, I also noticed she was behaving kinda femenine, slightly more than usual... yanno, open and receptive smily and giggly I was like o.0 interesting... hehe.
I want girls damnit! -_-
Also haven't busted a nut in 3 days (on and off nofap), love the feeling in your stomach/sexual organ areas, feeling of being fully loaded LOL. sexual energy is strong.
keep getting hunches that there's a possibility that i'll get laid this year, dunno just a hunch. (18 in november can't wait)
