03-29-2013, 10:22 AM
I am seeing myself go through some deep internal shifts which I believe are the cause of the challenges I have faced this month. These shifts are obviously necessary to achieve my goals. The fact that these shifts are not entirely enjoyable is one of the reasons we have been so careful screening those who were accepted to use this program: it is important that when the going gets tough, that the program is not abandoned.
Not everyone will have this sort of challenge, but I'd be willing to bet that for most people one or more stages will be hard to go through. These changes are challenging, but they're also good for you, as long as you refuse to give up. Sometimes I have had to resort this last month to blindly refusing to give up, knowing that in spite of it all, just holding on regardless would see me through. Sometimes the moment becomes so enveloping it's hard to see the big picture.
I realized this morning that part of the reason I have been having such an issue with depression the last few days stems from the fact that I have a tooth needing to be repaired, and the dentist is booked a month in advance. So chewing on that side is painful, and as a result, I have unwittingly started eating more simple carbs because softer (less painful) foods are often simple carbs. Eating steal invariably gets meat caught under the tooth and this presses on the gum in a painful way. I can't carry my water pik around with me, so if I eat meat I end up having painful gums until I can get back home. Not pleasant.
Today I focused on eating more protein and balanced it with complex carbs and I feel much better.
I also did something today that I suspect is BAMM in action. After breakfast, I wandered the plaza, exploring. I have never done that before. I discovered a discount store in which I found a lot of nice clothes that I liked, at about 20% of the price they'd have been selling in a retain shop or at the mall. Nice. Now I am set for nice casual clothes for a long time.
BAMM seems to be pushing me to socialize, learn and discover new things. I am really enjoying that aspect of it.
I also seem to be seeking out and purchasing important things, quality things that will be important but need only be purchased once if I get good quality. I seem to be building an arsenal of some sort, but I don't yet fully know what for exactly. This must be the Optimus Engine at work. I suspect it might be building me up so that I can almost entirely stop spending money when I am done. As if to say, "These are the things we need to be set for purchases for a long time, and once we're done getting this, we can save all that money instead."
Not everyone will have this sort of challenge, but I'd be willing to bet that for most people one or more stages will be hard to go through. These changes are challenging, but they're also good for you, as long as you refuse to give up. Sometimes I have had to resort this last month to blindly refusing to give up, knowing that in spite of it all, just holding on regardless would see me through. Sometimes the moment becomes so enveloping it's hard to see the big picture.
I realized this morning that part of the reason I have been having such an issue with depression the last few days stems from the fact that I have a tooth needing to be repaired, and the dentist is booked a month in advance. So chewing on that side is painful, and as a result, I have unwittingly started eating more simple carbs because softer (less painful) foods are often simple carbs. Eating steal invariably gets meat caught under the tooth and this presses on the gum in a painful way. I can't carry my water pik around with me, so if I eat meat I end up having painful gums until I can get back home. Not pleasant.
Today I focused on eating more protein and balanced it with complex carbs and I feel much better.
I also did something today that I suspect is BAMM in action. After breakfast, I wandered the plaza, exploring. I have never done that before. I discovered a discount store in which I found a lot of nice clothes that I liked, at about 20% of the price they'd have been selling in a retain shop or at the mall. Nice. Now I am set for nice casual clothes for a long time.
BAMM seems to be pushing me to socialize, learn and discover new things. I am really enjoying that aspect of it.
I also seem to be seeking out and purchasing important things, quality things that will be important but need only be purchased once if I get good quality. I seem to be building an arsenal of some sort, but I don't yet fully know what for exactly. This must be the Optimus Engine at work. I suspect it might be building me up so that I can almost entirely stop spending money when I am done. As if to say, "These are the things we need to be set for purchases for a long time, and once we're done getting this, we can save all that money instead."
Subliminal Audio Specialist & Administrator
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
The scientist has a question to find an answer for. The pseudo-scientist has an answer to find a question for. ~ "Failure is the path of least persistence." - Chinese Fortune Cookie ~ Logic left. Emotion right. But thinking, straight ahead. ~ Sperate supra omnia in valorem. (The value of trust is above all else.) ~ Meowsomeness!
