Path to Greatness - Journal

[Javier Gerardo]

I think you and I are almost at the same usage with ASC 5G. I know what you mean about it hitting you hard. It makes me feel really exhausted and tired and depressed at times like it's changing some deep rooted things related to confidence. A break of a day definitely helps and I've been trying to do the 3 days on and one day off routine. I would suggest giving that a try to allow your brain to process some of it.

I might give that a try man. However on my days off how can I make up for it? Like what Shannon has said that to add 1 1/2 days for every day that I have missed listening to the sub? Or should I continue with my planned 90 days of using it?

Anyway, last Saturday night my MP3 player stopped playing due to low battery. I had a very vivid dream or I might say a nightmare that night. I can feel that my brain did process the sub the sub. In this case as to my dream, was it showing the resistance of my sunconscious? My dream was horrific and trying to show my deep rooted fears.

I also understand what you mean about that gentleman nice guy mindset because I've come to realize that I have it too though it is less than it used to be. I grew up with a step mother that repeatedly quashed my confidence since I was a young child and made feel ugly and unlovable. On top of that my culture taught me that one should only get intimate with a woman after getting married. I grew up thinking that I must wait only for "the one" and that I must always be nice to women and listen to what they say even if it's total crap, etc. I was wound up so tight in trying not to do anything that would in my mind hurt them that I could never really relax around a girl I really liked and thought that teasing and flirting with them would hurt them if I didn't seriously like them. When I finally made it through all that crap and started dating girls in the final year of college and after college I was still afraid that I would hurt a woman and found myself analyzing everything and still being way too much in my head. I like you pushed away so many chances at dating some amazing women. I can see now the actions I took that pushed them away and it really pisses me off that I missed those chances and that I still indulge in those actions today.

Thanks for sharing and understanding my point man. This is the reason why I posted that here because you guys understand and can relate to my situation. Most of the friends nowadays are naturals with women so they can't totally understand what I have gone through before. But they have taught me a lot about the game.
All those years of watching too much romantic films and disney fantasies have taken a toll on me. I imagine my love life to be also like that. Like marry my "princess" and be like prince charming. Add the fact that I was raised Catholic and went to numerous Private Catholic schools when I was still studying.
However my family was really loving and supportive towards me. They are quite conservative though. In contrast to me being liberal and free spirited.

I do think that getting rid of the old nice-guy mindset is a must to become the men we want to be! I've made a lot of progress but I am still bumping into that old mindset even now at times. Don't get me wrong, I do believe in being kind, loving, polite and am all those things to my friends, family and people I care about. I'm considerate of people and do try to help whenever possible but not at the expense of my own principles, integrity, decisions, and time. I've realized that I can be all those while being strong and being my own man with a spine. I've realized that the nice guy mindset must be destroyed to really have the success with women that we want. To be able to interact with women without any agenda or investment is what I'm aiming for. To Share from Strength, not weakness and to realize that girls are far stronger emotionally then we give them credit for and that sex and everything related to sex is not hurtful to them even if it's only a one time thing. The key is being honest about it an not leading them on to think that the relationship is more serious than it is.

The other thing that struck me this past week was the realization that you can look at flirting and etc with women that you are not interested in long term can be seen as just practice and a way to make both of you feel better. As long as you're honest about it then it's a good thing. Look at it as just practice and a way to build your confidence.

Yeah practice. I would like to think that all of this is just practice and every time I go out and socialize and even try to approach I get more xp. XP points that makes my social skills increase one level. Lol!